I could have never been a baker because they would have to throw a delicious lopsided cake away, based on principal. However, the truth is I am enjoying serving more and more lopsided, imperfect, delicious, ooey, gooey, cakes. It may seem odd for me to create this comparison to life, but if you stop and think about it, maybe you will see.
In the past I would become so upset over the smallest things. Oh my if someone didn’t like me or worst yet, thought bad of me! I mean someone told me the other day they didn’t appreciate or agree with one of my blogs. I batted my eyes, truly listened to their concern and apologized. No, I wasn’t angry, hurt or frustrated! I kind of understood where they were coming from. (I will come back to this conversation later in the post).
No, I have never been a baker and I am pretty sure most of my cakes have always been losided, similar to a volcano drooping down on one side, unevenly. However, in other ways I was a perfectionist! I expected everything to be perfect. Actually that’s not quite true, I expected, for everyone else, to have expectations, of me, to be perfect! That makes so much more sense, to me.
You see Ms. Debbie’s words of wisdom rings, throughout my head, when someone misunderstands something I have written or stated, “Teena, you need to finish that thought; not everyone knows you well enough to follow the many thoughts rolling through your head. That means you could be easily misunderstood.”
It is true. My thoughts are swirling by the millions and when I become excited or extremely emitting energy in one way or another, the outcome of my words are not always self explainatory!
Back to the point! In the past I always thought I had to be perfect. Although it is unrealisitic nor possible, I placed those restraints on myself. I always wished I could blame this on someone else, but I can’t. It isn’t because of the expectations my mother had, husband or children. Not what the school system placed on me nor the parents or students. It was me! I lived in a perfect world and if anyone messed it up, I would almost fall apart just like a baker would if he/she had to serve one of my slippery sloping cakes.
However, now I just don’t have it in me. Not really that I have slowed down or my thoughts have become less and less. That is far from the truth! I rarely have any particular expectations anymore. I feel myself evolving to one of the richest parts of my life, yet. It is amazing! The feeling of butterflies fluttering in my stomach, when I know Eric is on his way home. The excitement that overwhelmes me when I get to see all my children, family and friends. I am truly grateful and blessed.
I can remember (which I will only remember this for a moment then I am letting it go forever) coming home and being filled with anxiety, stress and aggitation. I worried about how everyone, I do mean everyone in my life chidren, husband, mom, dad, grandma, teachers, peers, students, principals…I worried about! I can’t tell you how many tears I have shed over someone being ‘mad at me.’ If you have ever felt this way or continue to live this way, read on I am about to spill the beans of how it is ‘fake news.’
Come in closer, get real quiet while reading this…IT IS NOT IMPORTANT! Yes, you heard it here first! Perfectionism is not important nor will it add to your life. It is true. Being ‘Perfect’ is ‘Fake News.’ I have meditated this entire year, almost everyday, to gather information or muddle through some theories, so I could share with you! Guess what? I have even tried to Remember why I hated someone (never really experienced HATRED, nor do I want to, so let’s call it disliked their actions). Could remember very little. Almost like when you soak an aspirin to give to an elderly, attempting to swallow. The memory still had a little substance, but not enough to recognize what it was and the end result was no more pain or suffereing from that situation! Wow!!!! In other words, “This too will pass.”
Yes, some memories carry a powerful impact both negative or positive, but the strongest impact is how you felt and how you feel. Instead of struggling or wrestling with the past, go bake a cake! Make it lopsided, oozing with melted icing and enjoy the laughter about your blunders.
It is time to come out of the closet, perfectionist. You are worthy of being terrific without being perfect. Just do it! Drop your rules and regulations for yourself and let us see the beautiful YOU! The VIBRANT YOU! It makes me so excited, I just want to break into song! You know a random song that says, “You are wonderful, be happy, enjoy, mess up and laugh along the way!!!”
Hmmmm I might have something!
Back to the blog posting that might have not been a complete or self explanatory concept, I admit I have imperfections! Thank you for noticing and better yet thanks for reading my blog! As always I hope you are inspired and motivated to live a Happy Life!
Had to use this picture because all the lopsided cakes I look up were, what? PERFECT!!! Go ahead and try it, type in Google search, ‘Lopsided Cakes’ grrrrrr they were adorable!!!! Lol oh well be happy!