Category Archives: children

Delete It!

Do you ever look at e-mails, social media, cell phones or anything else exposing your name and think…What if I deleted EVERYTHING! I never think of that either!

As I chuckle to myself about that last statement, I wonder if this is what our children think. Not deleting everything, but about life. For example, “Mommy, Have you ever felt like life was overwhelming? Have you ever felt like ‘giving up’?”

As the child, who is struggling with what may seem silly to an adult, ponders asking this question to their mommy or daddy.  I can only imagine what they think an adult would respond with. For example, “Of COURSE, I feel like giving up. Have you not seen all the crud going on? Ball practice, work, birthdays. But what do you have to worry about? You are being cared for.”

PARENTS! I am not saying you are doing anything wrong. I promise life is overwhelming at times and young parents today, have a great deal of pressure. Which is why I am writing this post.

If you have times of glaring at your connections to the world and you feel overwhelmed, then your child is probably feeling the same way.

Therefore, I am suggesting take time and DELETE IT! I know it sounds crazy, but when you are feeling overwhelmed with LIFE, make up a game with your family and have a delete it night.

Example:

  1. Explain to your children or partner, we are going to have a delete it night.
  2. Have everyone
    1. write their issues
    2. speak it
    3. sing it   Example: Child- I made an F, my friend was mean to me, Work was awful today. Everyone is allowed to share what they are feeling overwhelmed, hopeless, or depressed about.
  3. Take time to listen to everyone’s sharing of their feelings.
  4. BUT! After each complaint EVERYONE says, “Delete It!”
  5. Or you can sing “DELETE IT!”

The point is to reverse the trajectory of your thoughts on what is and has been. Because you can’t change the past…no matter what!

Deleting it allows:

  1. Acceptance that everyone has down times and feels like giving up.
  2. A switch in vibrations.
  3. Allows everyone to see how life carrys on even when it feels cruddy at this moment…IT will get better!

As always…God Bless and KNOW you are LOVED UNCONDITIONALLY!

Livelove

&

Carry On

If you would like a little help with ‘Life’ let us know. Livelove.teena@gmail.com and we will begin your Happy Coaching as soon as possible.

Life is meant to be experienced.

Www.livelovellc.org/home

 

 

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When it doesn’t fit, do you continue to wear it?

When you go to the closet and pick up a pair of pants, that do not fit any longer, do you continue to wear them? If you do attempt to ‘make do’ does it become disastrous?

At one time, I worried about being too fat, not good enough and was terribly unsatisfied with the way my clothes fit. I decided to become dedicated to the cause. I worked out and felt terrific. I reached my goals and felt pretty good about myself.

However, I had this one pair of pants! They were my favorite pair. Black silky material, elastic waist, balloon pant legs which created an illusion, I was wearing a long evening gown, but they were functional. I would tell the kids they were my ‘Fancy Pants.’ I truly did love this pair of pants.

Therefore I continued to wear them. Who cared, if they were five sizes too big. No one else knew, just me. As I daydream back to the day I remember my honey bunny saying, “When are you going to get rid of those pants?! They are hanging off of you and if you aren’t careful they will fall down in front of your class!”

What did he know about fashion? I didn’t pay any attention to his nonsense. I arrived at work early and whistled as I walked into the front door. “Good Morning, Ms. Connie,” I cheerfully said as I scooted past her office, in my flowy pants.

The day went wonderful. All of my lessons were going as planned and life couldn’t be better. My planning time came and it was time for lunch. As I nonchalantly danced by the office I heard a deep, male voice call out my name, “Mrs. Drake?”

I jumped a bit and then I heard, “We need your help in the office.”

As much as I wanted to play sick and run back to my classroom, I didn’t. I never wanted to upset Ms. Connie, she is the best.

Turns out she had left due to a family emergency and I was the only ‘warm body’ who could fill in, at least until after my planning period. Which might I add, it was always a short planning time, until today! This day seemed like forty-five minutes was forty-five days.

Of course I quickly found myself sitting in ‘THE CHAIR’ the one where all the phone calls come in, the parents, grandparents, step parents, sick kids, medicated students, vomiting teachers, and last but not freaking least the INTERCOM SYSTEM! I may seem a bit dramatic, but the office manager, in my opinion, has the most difficult job of any in the school system.

The first parent arrived within five minutes of me sitting down. She said in a meek little voice and shaky hands, “Yes, my daughter is in 6th grade and she left her book bag at home. Soooo I wanted to bring it to her…”

I quickly interrupted in a flustered voice, “What? Who did you say? You are going to have to speak up and what class is she in?”

Oh for goodness sakes that one took me fifteen minutes. Including that ordeal, I had four teachers, one cafeteria assistant calling me and the outside calls, were rolling over to an email, faster than I could answer.

It was my last five minutes and a dad buzzes at the door. I let him in, he requested to pick up his son in 6th grade. Most organized human I had dealt with in the past forty minutes. He knew which class at the correct time and spoke up. Pleased with my survival skills through the past few events…I smile really big and I politely say, “Thank you for being so organized and I will call your son up at this time.” (I almost sounded like a robot).

I call the classroom, no he is not in there. Hmmm maybe this dad made a mistake. This continues on for a couple of times. I am now using the intercom and telephone when he yells out, “OH I am so sorry, I forgot he is in seventh grade, he is in math!”

He yelled so loud I fell back into the roller chair, that I had been attempting to spin back and forth in, to accomplish more, in a shorter amount of time. When I fell I zoomed backwards towards Ms. Connie’s desk and quickly spun around, placing my elbows on the desk and hands under my chin. “I am sorry, I didn’t quite catch that?”

He repeated it in a much calmer and embarrassed voice, “My son is in the seventh grade, I am so sorry…”

As he continued to apologize I had become a little smirky and to be blunt I was ticked off. I spun around to turn my back to this man, whom I was upset with. Placed both feet firmly on the ground…pushed my behind up using both hands and my body.

AND…as fast as I stood up, my pants came plummeting down. Yes, down to my knees! My bare behind was there for this man and whoever else wanted to see! I quickly plopped back down, as I gasped for air! Not only were they down, the bottom of my right pant leg was tightly wound around the wheel. I wasn’t going anywhere.

I remember I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry and the man, he turned around and walked out in the hall. Probably to laugh so hard he had to pee his pants! Mr. Genton heard me laughing hysterically, as I grabbed my stomach and bent over to attempt and free my pants leg! Of course he helped the father find his son and all he could say between his tears of hysterical laughing, was, “Why do you wear pants that are clearly to big?”

I hope you are now laughing too! This is absolutely a true story. I guess now most of you know why, when someone suggests me working in an office, I laugh and politely decline.

You see, not only were my pants too big, but I was attempting to fill even greater shoes.

Are you doing the same thing in life? Are you continuing to wear the old YOU, who doesn’t fit anymore? It isn’t about the size, it’s about the fit. Isn’t it time you find your own shoes to fill? And if you are hanging on to those old clothes, ask yourself, “Do I want to return to this person or am I okay with brand new and a better fit?”

If the world is continually rotating that means there is never a stagnant moment. Meaning CHANGE is inevitable.

Sometimes we hold ourselves to ‘way back then’ so long, we forget to experience the now and forever more. When you fit in your own skin, life feels pretty TERRIFIC!

God Loves YOU NO MATTER WHAT!

Livelove

&

Carry on!

I am so excited about this great adventure. I would love for you to come along and see all the beautiful stops we are making along the way! If you need a little umf in your life e-mail me at Livelove.teena@gmail.com

A New Service for you: Angel Card Readings they are fun and always enlightening. Of course we continue to offer workshops and Happy Coaching.

Www.Livelovellc.org/home

The most important part of our business is assisting you in finding your happiness!

California? Again?

As I begin to unpack my daughter in California, once again, I reflect on my past experiences. A time when I questioned everything. Was I making the ‘right’ decision? What if…? The questions would race through my head. My fears were overwhelming. Should I allow her to follow her dreams at such a young age? What about her safety? What about my other daughter, who willingly volunteered, to be her guardian? Could she handle this gigantic move and undertaking? You see, my daughter had been signed by an agent and was asked to move to Los Angeles California, at the age of 17. We were estatic! The hometown circumstances, let’s just say, weren’t the best for Ashby, at the time. However, could my girls survive in LA??? They were raised in a small little Kentucky town and Ashby was still in high school. Darion had moved to Nashville at the age of 18, but I could drive there in four hours. And I spent almost 6 months of weekends in Nashville! Once the decision was made we took off driving across the country. That was four years ago and here I am again! She is now 21 and although I knew this day would come, it doesn’t make it any easier!!! After her last adventures, I knew she would return home. Back to California. It hasn’t been any easier, but it is rewarding to know she is where she wants to be. My brain will continue to race and question, “Am I making the correct decisions, as a parent.” However, all I want for my children is for them to follow their bliss. And that is what she is doing. You know I can remember thinking I wouldn’t survive, the last time. Yet, here I am four years later. If you are struggling with anything in your life, right now. Please, remember you are loved and if you can pause briefly…I promise, “This too shall pass!” God Bless Livelove & Carryon Www.livelovellc.org/home Livelove.teena@gmail.com Need some help with a situation in your life? Email me, I would love to hear from you!

Happy Coaching 101 (day four) tbc…

Yesterday, I left you hanging because you received exactly the information, I received when I told this nice (strange, to me at the time) lady her first Happy message.

At first it was the usual, I send the message and no response. I messaged her the next day and said, “Are you okay? Do you want to continue your coaching?”

Normally, I do not feel the need to have a response, but for some reason my confidence was way down, due to the circumstances. You see, after she told me about her loss, I questioned, is their happiness after losing a child or your husband? I wasn’t sure and nor did I want to find out. Therefore, like many others I chose to not talk about those horrific events or possibilities. God had a different plan!

Please note that my first response, when she requested Happy Coaching, was No. I am not sure this is what you need! Why? Because after she told me her circumstances I was pretty sure a grieving counselor would be best. However, she sternly insisted and explained, “I have already done all of the counseling, I am going to do. I wish to receive your services.”

Now for her first response to the message. After sending it I heard nothing for about twenty four hours. The next day was rapidly ending when I receive a text that said, “NO.’

“No? What? No you do not want to continue? No you won’t create the map? No you won’t take the imaginary eraser and erase your pain? What is the No for,” I asked.

I received nothing for another twenty four hours. Then this is the explaination…”No, I will not erase anything! No, I do not want to discontinue the coaching! No, I do not want to share, but did create it.”

Okay? I thought. Then I sent the next message:

I am glad you chose to not erase all the tears, pain and hurt you have had in your life. Now it is time to create the next portion of your life map. What you want or desire? The past map was for you to recognize that you have had some fun life experiences and to see how many skills you have developed. The imaginary eraser was for you to delete the pain. However you quickly realized erasing those down times, you would be erasing the good as well because no matter what, there will always be ups and downs. But to erase the pain is to also erase the life with your child and husband and although losing them was terrible and hurt dearly, you would not have wanted to miss being with them on this journey. Enjoy, creating the life you want to lead. What does a typical day look like? Where do you want to live? Do NOT hold back allow the freedom of your imagination.

Please note, I know how difficult it must be, to focus on the future with all your loss, but this is one portion of our steps to finding your own happiness. That is to recognize the past has brought you to this point and no matter what you nor anyone else can change it. However, it is up to you to decide how you incorporate your paradigm, into your future. The main goal is to NOT live in the past, learn from it, enjoy the good parts and now only focus on the future (end of message).

I learned as much from this lady as she did me. We didn’t talk on the phone, she paid in money orders, and nor did I have her address. Even when I attempted to make excuses or bow out (due to being unsure I could help her) she would insist and deliver me a message.

From what I have learned is everyone suffers at one point in their life. Whether it be losing a child, divorce, death, drugs suicide, accidents, job loss, illness and much more. Everyone is on their own path and we all handle circumstances differently. However, one thing is for sure…Happiness is a choice. You can choose to mourn for the rest of your days and highlight the catastrophes. Or you can choose to live for the next great adventure and highlight the accomplishments.

On a personal note…I have had some of my dear friends suffer great losses and I am super sorry for that. My only hope is for you to remember and illuminate the GOOD in those loved ones you have burried. Try not to focus on their absence as much as their triumphs. My dear friend, who lost her son to a deadly illness always told me, I don’t want him to be known for his illness, death or his name to be emotionally attached to sadness or despair. Rather, she wants him to be known for his life, accomplishments, and his kindness he brought to the world. Wow! I must say that is a phenomenal desire and wouldn’t our loved ones be so happy to know, we are celebrating them?

God Bless!

Until we meet again my friends, your legacy will live on.

Livelove

&

Carryon

Www.Livelovellc.org/home

Livelove.teena@gmail.com

 

 

 

Merry Christmas…

I recently wrote an article entitled, A Simple Message, about the one common strand ‘meaning’ of the holiday season. Which I have found that common strand is LOVE! Whether you celebrate Christmas or not.

Which continues to be the true meaning of the season, for me. However, the story of Christmas is one of the sweetest and most miraculous stories of all.

As I anxiously, await for my children to come barreling in my room and wake me up, I close my eyes and attempt to imagine the birthday of baby Jesus. (Yes, I know my children are all adults, but my babies they will forever be!)

Just think doing your regular duties and a big bright star shines super bright. Angels appear throughout the night, gifts were brought and a beautiful baby boy is born. His story has been told in many languages and is celebrated in a multitude of places.

The season is about love, but Christmas to me will always be about thanking God for sending this world a baby, baby Jesus. His message has always been strong, his story illuminates love, peace and strength.

Let me ask you something? Do you think they were always strong? Do you believe that Mary and Joseph knew HOW they were going to make it? No, the answer is no! They had no idea how they were going to do this. Nor where. They endured a great deal and yet they survived and went on to leave a Legacy.

As you celebrate Christmas…think about the sweet story of the birth of Jesus and the Love he brought to this world. However, also think of the entire story and how much and how many people were affected.

I don’t believe is was all lollipops and rainbows for the shepherds, Inn Keeper, Wise Men or Mary and Joseph. They were in a rough environment and in today’s society the family would be considered less fortunate. However, they had all they needed! A sweet baby boy who would change the world forever!

If you are in a bad spot or down and out this Christmas. Please pause, then try to remember a happy time in your past. Maybe an old tradition or just get out your Bible and read the sweetest story ever. I don’t know how, but I do know what! Merry Christmas my friend, you are loved, no matter what!

God Loves you

and

Jesus does too!

Happy Birthday Sweet Baby Jesus, we will try to exemplify your meaning and Love, Love, Love one another!

Livelove

&

Carryon

Www.livelovellc.org

Email me if you would like to start the year off with, two free weeks of Happy Coaching.

Livelove.teena@gmail.com

Change is inevitable; Self Doubt is a reminder

As we all know change occurs second by second, whether you control the change or simply allow it, now that ‘changes’ EVERYTHING! However, what about self-doubt? What part of self-doubt can assist us in dealing with or controlling the change in our lives?

Could it be that self-doubt is a reminder that you can control how the, inevitable changes, occur in your life.

If we know changes are going to happen, we know everything in our lives, is not going to stick to the plan, why not utilize those ‘not so good’ self doubting, moments to empower you?

How? Simple, recognize that self- doubt is that friend that forces you to think about the worse case scenario. No, I am not an advocate for ‘what ifs’ however, what if, this doubt serves a vital purpose in accomplishing great things or taking the simpler, more paved road and enjoying the ride.

Either or the opportunity to recognize this moment of wallowing in what has been or could be, can be (if you choose) a great asset to your ‘happiness’ tool box.

Next time you experience that moment of OMG! What am I doing? How will I find my path? I can’t do this, I am not good enough! Moments, choose a time to let it go.

For example: You are stepping out on a limb, the limb feels wobbly and you are contemplating what can, will or might happen. You would weigh all the outcomes/options and either set a limit of how far you can go or keep walking and see what happens. Either or you will have change. You will have an outcome. You also chose all of those outcomes!

Set a time frame to poop or get off the pot. If you want to control or learn to enjoy all changes, when self-doubt appears, allow it for a set time or space.

Next, be grateful for the opportunity to weigh all options and MOVE ON. Allow the short-lived negative emotion to propel you into the wonderful, terrific, fabulous life you have always wanted.

I am so excited for us! As I am allowing my life to be utilized as a messenger. A messenger for you and I to live for the best in and of you & me.

I know life has hit you upside the head several times! I know when just arriving in the valley, you struggle with seeing a way to begin climbing to the top, again.

This change has been since the day you were born. When you took that first breath you began adjusting with the changes in environment, how you ate and how you slept.

You have what it takes to live the life you have always wanted. It’s up to you, how long you allow the changes to hit you, like a ton of bricks. Or how you utilize self-doubt. Either or you will have change, you will experience down & out times and only you can decide how to allow self doubt to assist you or hender you.

Livelove

&

Carryon

http://www.livelovellc.org/home

Some days are diamonds…

Okay everyone you all should know (because you are a bad blogger, social media guru, author, wife, oh I almost forgot even better a BAD human if you don’t keep up with a million posts, birthdays, anniversaries, moms, dads, aunts…Oh you get the point!)

Anywhoooooo, you may know it is me and my husbands twenty fifth anniversary, today! Yes, November 13 we were married on Friday the 13th!! Because it is my lucky day, if that freaks you out, you might want to stop reading this particular post. Why? You ask? You see my dear friend this won’t be a tribute to how wonderful the past 25 years have been and how he is my hero! But rather a few funny things that enter my mind when you are celebrating your twenty fifth anniversary! with another human. That human who began with you on a journey full of lust, more lust, more sex, and YES EVEN MORE SEX! So keep reading, if you so dare because I am on a roll this morning in paradise and you never know what is going to come out of these fingers 😉!

My first thought of the morning is, on this marvelous anniversary is, get up early so I can clean up and smell good and feel all rarrrrr sexy!!! Mmmmm I am feeling frisky!!! HOLD UP!!! Were you actually about to believe that horse sh_t (Look, I know people cuss and actually in an ‘adult environment I am kind of bad with a couple of my favorites! However, some of the people who I respect in this world are so good to me, that I never want to offend them. Even if they never understand what the hell I am talking about, because I am the weirdest family member they have! You understand, right?).

Where was I? Oh I get up early because doodie calls! Literally, it’s time to pee at 6 am!!! “Come on, it’s my 25th a__ hole, you couldn’t let me sleep a little bit longer?”

Okay, get up, slip on Hawaiian dress, screech open the stuck door that when it opens the entire neighborhood knows, Teena is up her bladder named butthead and butt named donkey are at it again.

I take care of my business…and I pause and think, “Maybe, I should take an early morning shower, he might feel like twenty five years ago. (I drift off back to when hard ons were like the jungle. You saw them as never ending).

Then I thought he probably will wake up feeling frisky, but what about me? (I switch back from my day dream, look in the mirror) I say, “Ehhh it’s early and I probably have to go again, so I have got time to decide for now I will take a nap!”

I mean I was correct on my decision, I did have to get up again in like 30 minutes. Hence, that’s why I am writing this post. I mean I honestly do feel all gooey and ooey about my honey bunny and I am truly more in love with him now, than I was twenty five years ago. Fortunately, we have made it!!!

But come on yall veterans, at this 25 years and beyond! All that hoopla was horse sh_t! Yes, you still love that man if you made it through twenty five years. Yes, you have been through some hard times that won’t seem to leave you alone. YES HOPEFULLY, you have had some good sex, that’s like a cool breeze that will taunt you forever! (If you can’t hear the tune in my head that keeps playing, it is John Denver ‘ Some Days are Diamonds and Some Days are Stone!)

But I must say I am here at twenty five years of celebrating and to be honest I can’t believe some of you woman who have lied and said, ” Ohhh it gets better just hang on one more day it gets better!”

When they for d_mn sure knew it is, what it is!

It is an accomplishment!!!!!!

I will give you that! But everyone’s like what are you going to do on the ‘day’? Don’t you guys want to ‘do’ something together? Like a romantic dinner or sex on the beach or sit and sweetly tell one another how amazing he or she has been for the past 25 years.

Listen up!! If you haven’t told him or her how amazing they are a great deal of the time over the past 25 years — YOU AREN’T CELEBRATING YOUR 25TH ANNIVERSARY! Nope not happening.

Okay, so the funniest questions we have had and I say ‘we’ because I have heard Eric get asked the same questions, are, “Omg, how did you do that? That is so awesome! What is your secret?”

Let’s get one thing straight there are no dag on secrets to marriage of 25 years staying together. Even if there were they would all be individual secrets, this isn’t a one size fits most deal! And noooo, we aren’t from the generation where, “If it’s broke, we don’t junk it we fix it!”

Actually, Eric and I are from the generation of, if it fits for awhile wear it, but things do wear out so throw them away and get new, generation. So nope that’s not the reason we ‘made’ it 25 years.

Ohhh I love this one, ” Mom and dad you guys are amazing. Except, it’s difficult for us kids to live up to that because we want it ‘just like you two!”

Shut the F_ck bleep, bleep, bleep up!!!!

We worked our butts off to ensure you guys had what you needed and wanted to live a happy fulfilling life. Some days it was good we were so broke because it financially made sense to stay together.

Yes, we love all four of you and yes we have enjoyed each of you as well as each other. But kiddos, being best friends is easy because we typically choose people who love what we love to do as are best friends, but as a mommy/ daddy and husband/wife, well that’s more of a role not a choice. Therefore, our only advice to you is live each day one step at a time, if in doubt don’t go out (it says on the beaches in hawaii), but in life I disagree.

Sometime you have to go out when in doubt, nooo not into the ocean, that’s stupidity, but in life. Ensure your doubt is not fear, follow your gut if it feels right then follow that. If a little doubt creeps in or the what ifs creep up, pause to ensure its not an emotion from the past seeping into the present.

Okay back to 25 years that became to deep, but hey we owe our past 25 years to them. Not because we stuck together ‘for the kids’ but rather we stuck together because we remembered how much fun and sex we had BK! (Hahahhaha, Before Kids).

I don’t know where I was going with that!

As most of you know I wrote a ‘Sex Ed’ book and have been working on a relationships book, but I just can’t wrap it up. You see I find things so comical now, that writing any guruish deep, serious, tear jerking, sappy message doesn’t work for me anymore. I don’t feel shameful, I don’t feel judgemental yet I don’t feel judged any longer.

How did we make it 25 years? Hmmm having alot of fun. Can it be that simple? Yes, it is. We have always tried to have fun together. We don’t have the same opinions, thoughts, or even all the exact same interest. But we always have fun.

I interrupt that last thought, to announce…Eric just peeked around the corner and said, “What are you doing up so early? You have been out of bed for like two hours?”

I crouched down as I begin to giggle, I say, “I just wanted to get a little post in on our 25th.”

He laughs, starts the coffee and moves about, to get dressed. We have a funny conversation about poop. We remembered one of the grandkids told Mamaw, the elderly think about sex, poop, eating and napping. I am beginning to see the similarities.

It looks like our day of deciding what we are going to eat, where we are going to burn in the sun, or meet up with a good friend named Larry or his brother Gary. So for now, here is to twenty five years of marriage to the same man.

The same man who Let me choose some creepy day to everyone else Friday the 13th. The same man who never followed a rule book it was right for one and right for all. He is a long list of things and they are all pretty wonderful. He is a good man and I plan on keeping him around for as long as he wants to stick around. I can promise him my heart always and forever. Not because the past 25 years have been perfect however, because I have had alot of laughs. You make me laugh on a cold rainy night or when the sun is shining bright! Keep the funny coming babe! I love you, Eric Drake.

PS. As I wrap up, trying to edit this post, Eric pours me a cup of coffee, stares at me (as I try to reread), and then he begins to talk…I acted like I was listening then I heard the word work and I could feel myself feeling guilty. I began to listen and he wanted to do something for his project and he knew it was our anniversary and felt guilty. I literally paused took a deep breath in and said, “I love you and happy anniversary. You should definetly check into work.”

We have never been off work this long, ever. On just vacation. So there ya go fans of the 25 year anniversary club, you don’t need a celebration with a big hoopla on the big 2 -5, if you are having fun almost everyday the BIG ‘ONE ANNIVERSARY’ is whatever you want it to be! Because daily happiness and doing what you love, being where you want to be and with your best friend to share in this journey, well its true…it’s paradise!

God Bless

Livelove

&

Carryon