I can’t believe it! Twenty five years ago Eric Drake, mommy and I, at four in the morning were driving to Kings Daughters Hospital in Madison Indiana. It was a cool, crisp, October morning and I can remember thinking and praying, “Lord, help me thru this and Please Please let me be a good mommy! It was 1992, I was six days shy of my twenty first birthday, Eric was 22 and working his butt off to make ends meet. I remember thinking this pregnancy can’t be over! (I loved being pregnant). It was similar to a journey down a path with another spirit, yet you can’t see them. She was always with me. Responded to my every move, she helped choose what we ate each day, she continued to push me to take care of myself. When she began to force her way out, it almost felt like she was ripping my insides out with her, but she was ready to see this earthly life. She was ready to create her own experiences, live, love and enjoy her life. The afternoon before our trip, to the hospital was beautiful, although I was really aggitated. Mommy called and I demanded she come meet me at the house. I whined so much Eric took me for a ride, on the back roads. Tim Perkinson, Ricky White and Jarod Stark were at the house, when we returned. Oh mommy as well. One look at me and she knew! Mom watched me cook supper, work around the house (which didn’t need to be cleaned), and breathe heavy, occasionally. It didn’t take long for her to look at Eric and say, “We are having a baby tonight, you need to rest up!” Eric turned white as a ghost and almost immediatly went to bed. Poop (Tim’s nickname) stayed with mom and I, to watch the rest of Fried Green Tomatoes. Oh and we can’t forget, we ate marshmallow cream and peanut butter. I was now having contractions 10 to 15 minutes apart. (We all acted like it was no big deal) The next part was hilarious! I don’t know why, but I decided I would drive Tim home. Why, either of them let me drive I will never know. Probably, I was super stubborn and demanded to drive. (Hmmm that sounds about right). It wasn’t that far! I remember the sky was almost black, with a few cirrus clouds, glowing with the reflection of the gigantic full moon! As we slowly creeped up the hill, where the headlights beamed, straight ahead, I had one of the worst contractions, I had ever experienced. About that time I slammed the gas pedal down, forcing my car to almost ramp the hill, heading down to his house. Mom and Poop screamed, then immediately stopped themselves only to hold their breath, in hopes of survival of the small, but tedious road trip. I almost came to a stop, when yep, it hit again and a repeat event happened! When Poop jumped out of the car he was terrified, his face was almost transparent, and all he could say was, “Goodluck, I will see you tomorrow.” The next four hours were touch and go! Until I began hitting the wall and rocking back and forth. Mom went to get Eric and we were off to the hospital! The next morning we had a beautiful baby girl! She was our surprise gift! Our family and friends came to support us. And our lives changed forever! It was an amazing day. You know, as I reflect and visualize for the future, I always want to share with you. LIFE is… What you make it! Eric Drake and I has no idea what we were doing October 2nd 1992! We had very little money, little life experience and yet all we knew is we loved this little human/spirit/baby girl more than words could express. She had colic for her first six weeks of life. I can remember we would trade off sleeping one hour at a time. We had our electric shut off once and our water a couple of times! However, Listen up!!! We made it! Twenty-five years later all those struggles are now funny memories! If you are struggling, right now…Please remember take everything in twos. I know most people will tell you, “One step at a time!” I do agree, but for me it has always been twos. If you can take one step why not two! If you can make it thru two seconds, two minutes, two hours, two days, two weeks!!! You can make it! I know you have sad times and struggles, but you got this!!! I have looked back over my twenty five years with this beautiful young lady and all four of our children and realized the difficult times become diluted and almost more cherished, because they always illuminate a growth period of awesomeness! A time where we all came together, depended on each other and were grateful for the good times!
It’s finally here! The birthday of the man, I have been itching to write about! Many of these stories have been tucked away, for when I let it all go and begin writing comedy, becuase I love him and his sly comical demeanor cracks me up.
See the man standing on the right? With a white shirt on? (Which is weird, he usually has a rich color of deep purple or blue, but it doesn’t matter, he always looks amazing.) This, ladies and gentleman is my Uncle Bob and after I complete this, you will wish he was yours.
(Aunt T and Uncle Bob)
Background: I have only heard stories about their first meeting, but it must have been wonderful. My Aunt T and Uncle Bob met in Bowling Green Kentucky at Western Kentucky University, over fifty years ago.
Both from neighboring counties, meeting at the university. After 6 months they were married and lived happily ever after. (That’s the story, thanks everyone!)
I can only imagine his excitement! He married one of the most beautiful women in the world. BUT… with beauty comes a family full of beautiful people and beautiful ideas (kind of?).
Bare with me! Yes, they have been married for a long time, they have two beautiful children, a wonderful son n law, adorable grand cats and four gorgeous grand children. But before all of that Uncle Bob married his sweet wife, who came with a sweet (Ha ha) farm family. LOL!
Uncle Bob had now acquired a brother and sister n law, who were still young, he never imagined what funny and chaotic things were in store for him, over the next fifty years or so!
Life has began:
I wonder when or if he ever began to truly understand the dynamics, of what he has taken on. I will say this he NEVER SHOWED his frustrations with all of us.
First Scott was born. My mom, Charlene, I believe was ten. In our family it is tradition for the grandmother to go and stay with their daughter for two weeks, after the baby is born. That means my Baw Baw, Violet, would be living with these newly weds. Hee hee, I giggle thinking about Baw Baw bossing everyone around and my Uncle Bob thinking what in the world have I done. He never said anything mean or hateful. (How do I know? Duh it’s Uncle Bob. I don’t have to be born to know how he is, He is just that AMAZING).
For a side note, my mom often wondered how he didn’t have a heart attack. Because she rode up on her bike with Scott in her basket and still he said nothing! We still chuckle about that.
Fast Forward: five years later my sister in spirit and my cousin for life was born, Trina Lou! Oh my, here we go again the entire family, but especially Baw Baw.
Three years later it’s me, it’s me not Sandra Dee, but little ole, meek, quiet, never says anything me, Teena Drake! What? You don’t agree? Okay, you are right, I was born talking.
Now I know, no one could have prepared this patient, gentle, kind caring, quiet understanding man about the next twenty years or more of his life, with the Ashby family.
I realize no one knows what the future holds and he would have been bored without us, however, let’s just say we put him to the test. I wish I could write ALL the funny stories about him, someday I will share them.
I do remember the day Trina Lou and I were discussing her dad’s temper. I laughed and laughed because I knew he was human, but a temper? Listen to her tell this…
“Teena, if you ever want to know if daddy is mad, watch his mouth!”
“What? His mouth? If my mom gets mad you better run because you don’t have to watch her mouth you will hear it.” (Me too, everyone knows if I am upset).
Trina continued giggling and lowering her voice to a whisper, “Seriously, he moves his jaw and licks his lips. I always know to move on. That’s how I know I am in trouble.”
Really? That’s it? She was telling the truth! Over forty years I have not heard him become angry, but I do watch his facial expressions, if I am concerned.
As years went on everyone has lived with Uncle Bob and Aunt T. Now I am not dumb by any means, however, I never realized how amazing my uncle Bob is and always has been, until I became an adult. When any of us were in limbo, needed a place to crash or live, or a hot meal or anything, Aunt T would say, “Come on over.” Or, “Sure you can live with us.”
I know she never thought twice! Sometimes, I think how the heck did my Uncle Bob do it! I am telling you it was always someone or something in our family. Card games, teenagers, Farm family, church friends even kids and grand kids of others. I bet if they had and register for all the people, who have stayed at their home, it would be filled, maybe two or three of them. Steady as always, my Uncle Bob, never faltered or gave up on any of us.
My last story to make you laugh and give you a grasp of how amazing this man is.
One of the times I was staying with them, Trina Lou and I had been riding bikes, in the neighborhood. We lost track of time (usual) and he came looking for us. When I saw the red station wagon driving down the road I said, ” Trina! We are in trouble.”
I jumped up from the wet ground and waved him down. I was filthy, butt wet from sitting in the grass, hair matted in the back because I hated taking time to comb it, I looked like I didn’t know how to dress myself. He slowly pulled off the side of the road, I immediatly began telling some long, dragged out, story of why we weren’t home. (Like I knew!). He listened patiently and I can now see he was laughing deep down, but he stayed calm. He replied with, “Girls it’s getting late you need to get home.”
I said, “Shew, we are a long way from home, I am glad you came…I will put my bike in the back…”
Continues with a straight face, not a shriek, peep nothing was to prepare me for what he said. My Uncle Bob smiled, then chuckled (like he does) and replied to my simple, understandable request with, “Nope, you are riding home. I am not putting you or that bike in my car.”
Let’s rewind! What? Did my Uncle Bob just laugh at us, four or five miles from home, drove out here not to yell at us, beat us, or anything, but won’t put my bike in his car? What is happening? I was devastated. However, after our ride home I never did that again.
Wrap it up: I could tell you a million funny and heart warming stories, about this man, my family has been blessed with.
He has lived with a lovely wife that I know he has always loved dearly. Even when she said, “Sure, you can live with us.” (Off the top of her head!).
He has Spent fifty Christmases, same as Thanksgiving, always tried to ensure my Aunt came home once a month (if possible), has been through Uncle Rod going to Vietnam, all of the nieces and nephews being born, countless birthday parties, graduations, he has cried with us, and laughed with us. All of this is just from his wife’s side of the family. He still has his other side to tend to and everyone elses too. Uncle Bob stayed strong and steady and carries on like none other!
Happy Birthday Uncle Bob we appreciate you! You are awesome!
We all love you!!! I hope you get to Golf today!
Wake up sleepy head!! Have you ever questioned why you don’t hear your alarm? Why you might struggle with rolling out of bed? Hmmm I might have the answer. Look for the sunshine or clean out your clutter so the sun can peak through. Many times we don’t hear our alarm because of the negative focus. Instead attempt to see and allow the sunshine to beam in.
My Baw Baw always said, “A little sunshine is all you need.”
I hear her singing, as she always did, 🎶You Are My Sunshine, My Only Sunshine, You make me happy when skys are gray, you will never know dear how much I love you!🎶 I wonder if a little sunshine can go a long way?
I watch the raging natural disasters, political controversy and human suffering, only to be reminded of the sun will rise again. Today is a new day.
Is there good in the world today? I will let you decide.
I watch as the rescuers silently listen for a small sound of life in the middle of what once seemed to be a sturdy building, but now is a pile of rubble. I instantly feel the warmth of the sun beaming through when a small cry is heard and as the little boy was pulled out, safe and sound, the entire crowd paused for a minute to celebrate, ANOTHER LIFE SAVED HOORAY! The crowd cheered. However, with in an instant the fist goes up and the crowd is silenced. In hopes to find yet another one.
Another group of people found a man stranded in his truck, with raging waters swiftly taking him away. Oh but wait, what is that? A human chain forming, each depending on one another’s strength to ensure another will live.
Animal lovers risk their lives to search, find and feed the beloved animals. Keep the sunshine coming!
As water pours into an arena where many had went to, for shelter, a group of people, formed a circle and prayed together. They didn’t ask what religion are you nor did they shun or judge. Keep the sunshine coming.
Listen up! Devastation happens. I can not explain why. However, I can change my focus and so can you. You see it does create a sad feeling, when you think of the devastating effects of a natural disaster. However, I promise the sun will rise again and the aftermath is super natural. One by one people come together and they are sunshine beaming-bright and strong.
Inspired writing at its best. I have had a hell of a week! And rather than boring you with the details I am want to tell you an inspired thought I just had! Maybe someone else needs this as well. Also I have an appointment in like 30 minutes and I don’t want to make Ms. Debbie keep waiting on me.
Inspired thougjt: With so many questions rolling through my head. Which way is best? Is it best for me or for them or for God or Jesus, or Buddha, or another religous organizations, the government, my kids….is it best for all races? Is it best for human kind or our nation? Please someone tell me? Answer the questions. Do I pray or not pray do I believe or not believe, encourage or discourage?
Don’t all of those questions overwhelm you? And have you benefitted from any of those questions? Nor have I and don’t I wish I could give you a solid answer. The truth is I can not give you any ‘answer’ at all!!!! I can only offer you an emotion a flow that is in sync with you and then hopefully if you want you can find your ‘path of least resiatance” (@abraham-hicks).
You see for over a year now (way before my accident) I began a quest, let’s say it was a spiritual yet deep quest! I have been asking people from all around the world three questions
1. If you were to be told you had six months to live from today what would you do?
2. After you die what happens? Describe and explain.
3. What is the meaning of Life and why?
Now I am not letting you in on the secrets to life, that I learned through this quest, just yet. Because if I didn’t get to ask some of you or other new friends because the time was not right, therefore my data is not clear.
However, hold on I must share one theory that has come out of this, but it is not my final answer!!! Okay?
What I meant to say just then was…there is no final answer! Nope not one. Your answers to these questions and mine, will be always changing and evolving. It may change from one minute to the next or you may create a habitual thought process you hold onto for life.
I can remember when I was ‘born again’ and so new and improved I became a bit better than others. I can remember blaming God for my woes and when I felt the lowest I could go I was on my knees until they were wearing holes in my jeans. Then came the next phase…the nothing syndrome. I believe in nothing, I think we are worth nothing, life is meaningless nothing! I must admit even the phases of studying ‘religious beliefs’ around the world this one I can’t deal with. Therefore, that’s the last of the nothingness. Because no matter what the emotional attachment to that entire concept makes me wonder why to life! Sooooo we have now had a peak into my inspired thought. My phone is dying and I am already late. (Poor Ms. Debbie, she is constantly wondering what am I going to do with Teena)
To be continued…
God loves you no matter what!!!!!
First, if you recently followed my blog or if you have always followed I want to say THANK YOU! If you are reading for the first time, this blog is a little catch up on who I am, where I am going and how grateful I am for where I have been.
Recently, I began a journey and decided to share it with you by blogging, here on my blog. My journey has been magnificent with ups, downs and all arounds, thus far. I wake up each morning excited about what the universe has to offer today. I smile, run to the mirror say, GOOD MORNING BEAUTIFUL WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY IT IS TO ENJOY THIS JOURNEY. I AM READY AND EXCITED ABOUT MY JOURNEY TODAY!!!!!!!!
Okay, to be honest, I don’t jump up and scream that every morning (but after reading it, I might try it because it feels really good) nor do I wake up in a perfect mood everyday. However, I do wake up every morning anticipating what is going to be Terrific in my day. I also will admit I have a few rituals of ‘Pump Me Up’ that I perform. Sometimes it is lay there until I catch the beautiful vision I want or I will talk to myself in the mirror for a brief moment. The most important part, you understand, is my journey is to live in a vibration of feeling happy the majority of the time. The most exciting part of this journey is I am sharing it with you!
Here is what we needed to clear up! I did have a life changing experience that reminded me of who I am. I have felt some (in my opinion very little) despair over this experience. The truth is me shattering my leg, laying in a ditch, and seven months later still trying to heal changed my life, by reminding me of my life purpose. You see I have had very few catastrophes in my life. I have suffered the loss of loved ones, but always felt the love I had for them will always keep them alive. I am sure my mother and father would tell you otherwise, but according to me my life was perfect from day one! I mean my mother didn’t name me for a couple of days and when she did come up with a name it was- Teena (unique spelling) and Gay for the middle!! What? Yes, I am telling you the only thing my accident did for me, which I am super grateful for, was to remind me of my life purpose. I was born to spread, be and teach others to be happy. To find their bliss.
That may sound crazy, but it’s true. I can’t tell you, of anytime in my life, that I havent found something good or positive out of a situation. Not one. Therefore, if I write about despair, depression, loss please note I am in no way shape or form comparing my measly little issues with some of your horrific situations. Lately, I have read some blogs that I feel so sorry for some people. That is why I felt like you needed to know I understand everyone has issues in their life. The best I can do is offer you new tools to assist you in enjoying your time here on earth; because they are my gifts I am sharing with you.
I am grateful for my life. I have lived a life most could only dream of. I had a strong circle of love from my family from parents to aunts/uncles, grandparents, step-parents, friends the list and circle becomes larger all the time. I married my best friend, have four beautiful children, and much more. Who am I? I don’t know, but I do know what I love and what creates a feeling of overwhelming happiness. I also know my ‘job’ ‘mission’ ‘life purpose’ ‘whatever’ you want to call it…it is to ‘be happy’ and teach you how to ‘be happy.’ Remember, what makes me happy doesn’t necessarily make you happy, but you will know when you FEEL IT!
God Bless You! God Loves You No Matter What!
Why does the word Be continually show up? As for me it’s constant because I have always been doing aomething. Working towards a goal or focusing on the perfect steps to get to where I want to be.
However, recently I have tried to just ‘Be.’ Sometimes it is awkward and I feel guilty or lazy. Then yet my paradigm kicks in and reminds my mind; how many times I have failed or how many times I have been hurt or how many times someone else did something to make ME not happy!
Really? Read that entire paragraph again! Words like guilt, not, hurt, sad (not happy) do not feel good, but just like you I feel them everyday. Now, my everyday is more like 5 fleeting moments. It’s almost like a quick, but painful PINCH under my arm, where the skin is super sensitive. OUCH! Ashby and I always said it was a bite from the love bug. (However, if that pain is a love bug it can move on because it hurts.)
Anyways, moments of soaking, sifting and reminiscing deep into your paradigm or past connections, isn’t the best path to propel your life into an amazing realm. Instead, practice the state of BE.
Be happy, kind, loving, peaceful whichever fits you today choose it and be it. If you do not feel like adding to it then go ahead and take a day to just ‘Be.’
Leave the worries of the world or I should say the worries of your paradigm in the trash. Not all of your paradigms, just those ones that do not bring you joy. Bob Proctor entitled it a paradigm shift. Therefore, when you decided what state you choose today, only focus on feeling good, enjoying the journey and let it be!
Who you? Yes, you! I don’t care who you are, where you are at this point in life, where you are going or where you have been. Not one thing could you say to me that would convince me anything different.
Why? You ask? As I woke up with the sunshine peeking through the storm clouds, this morning the ideas to write about, raced through my head. I felt super inspired and so I sat down, first meditated, then I began so sift through my social media. (As most can tell I am not the best at keeping up with Facebook and all of that.) However, I chose social media to find the feeling needed to inspire, enlighten and encourage you.
Here it is!!!! YOU ARE AMAZING!!!!! How did I come up with that from Social Media? I watched as people stopped to smile, hug, show off their new babies, find a great adventure, click and post. Freezing that memory in time in hopes, it will never vanish. I can tell you that out of thousands of students and after working with as many or more adults in life coaching, that not ONE person has ever said, “Mrs. Drake please do not tell me I am amazing or do not brag on me I am not worthy!”
In other words everyone wants and needs to be told how amazing and awesome they are. Even the most confident people need a boost once in awhile. Here it is…if you are reading this post you are amazing! If you aren’t reading it yep, still amazing. (Even if you do not know me, doesn’t it feel neat to read those statements of how amazing you are?)
After my morning meditation this is the message I was given. While you sleep a massive amount of manufacturing is going on inside your body. Just because you are asleep your heart doesn’t stop, it may rest, but continues to work along with the bone marrow, blood cells, brain activity, tissue, muscles, rna, dna and so on. Everything keeps working! If you sit and ponder just that portion it should wow you into amazement. You see you are amazing by default. You were created that way. Because you were given the gift of life you were born just the way you are, AMAZING! it makes me want to jump up and sing head, shoulders, knees and toes. However, I would add my own flare; Head, shoulders knees and toes working together to help my amazement flow.
I could probably write on just this topic for weeks or months, but today all you need to know is: YOU ARE AMAZING!!! ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT!
May your day be blessed and always know God loves you no matter what!!!!