Category Archives: memories

21? No way!

Yes, it is true I have a baby girl who turns 21 today. I remember the day quite well. By early in the morning on the 17th we decided she wasn’t coming therefore, why bother returning to the hospital, lol.

I had been admitted on the 16th and when nothing happened, I came home to see my four year old, Darion. Only to return the next morning for more poking and prodding. She was determined to stay, nesting in the womb enjoying mommy singing and walking her around.

It was an amazing day! We were calm upon entering the labor and delivery, had created a plan for Darion to come to the hospital and went in to finally hold this bundle of joy.

I can remember when they held this beautiful child up and said, “Meet your baby girl, Ashby Mae Drake.”

Tears streamed down my face. Of course I was elated, but I was also like that three month old, came out of me? You see, my first child was five pounds ten ounces. However, Ashby broke that record of having teeny tiny babies…she was nine pounds five ounces! Shew!!! She was mad! It was cold and she couldn’t get those screams to form words fast enough, therefore she screamed louder and sometimes in different pitches almost like she was auditioning for the voice, as a two minute old!

Everyone in the labor and delivery were scattered and shattered once Ashby had arrived. I realize that it’s normal for a delivery staff to be chaotic, but it’s how extreme the chaos was. I remember one nurse, who was tending to me, turned and as politely as she could said, “Okay, who is in charge of making sure Miss Ashby is happy!”

Really? Her first few minutes of life and she begins with that? And guess what? They did just that. People were scrambling, passing her from person to person, swaddling her to keep her warm and finally between me, Darion and Meemaw some how she became satisfied.

It was like a snap of the fingers and we are spinning around and she is 21!

The essence of Ashby…she has always loved all animals from snakes & reptiles to kittens & rats and everything in between. There was not an animal she couldn’t tame with a flick of her wrist and pick it up. Spanky the iguana, no one handled except Ashby Mae. She has been a visual artist since I can remember. By the time she was able to hold a pen in her hand, she has been drawing, way before she was walking. Her favorite way to paint from a year old on was in her birthday suit.

One time Eric had unannounced work clients come in from out of town, he called and said, “Some friends are coming over after work can you ask Ashby to dress?”

Her free spirit will take you on a whirlwind, similar to a plethora of Fall leaves being scooped up and dancing along the waves of the breeze. Then other times her vast interest in making the world a better place, but also ensuring all is fair in the world of Ashby, she will be more like a gust of wind.

Her essence of believing you can do anything is magnificent. Her determination to succeed is phenomenal. I remember when she was 15 she told me SHE would be in California by the time she was a Jr. In highschool. Of course, silly me doubted her! Boy was I wrong.

She began that day looking for reputable agents, (not the horrific experience we had at Cosmo, don’t do that). She found Wings in Cincinnati and the whirlwind had just begun. With in months we were attending workshops, meeting with several agents and finally she had decided on Jake Lang, who told her, “I am not sure you can do this.” ( I now know he knew exactly what he was doing).

Next thing I know, we are booking flights to Texas for expo, making new friends and signing on! For what? Oh sorry, of course Ashby was signed and expected to be where? By when? Yes!! California by February.

Those are just a few examples of the essence of Ashby Mae Drake. She has bedazzled us all since the afternoon of October 17th, twenty one years ago.

Thank you for being a great daughter and I love you! You are beautiful. Looking forward to many more!

God Bless

Livelove

Twenty Five!

I can’t believe it! Twenty five years ago Eric Drake, mommy and I, at four in the morning were driving to Kings Daughters Hospital in Madison Indiana. It was a cool, crisp, October morning and I can remember thinking and praying, “Lord, help me thru this and Please Please let me be a good mommy! It was 1992, I was six days shy of my twenty first birthday, Eric was 22 and working his butt off to make ends meet. I remember thinking this pregnancy can’t be over! (I loved being pregnant). It was similar to a journey down a path with another spirit, yet you can’t see them. She was always with me. Responded to my every move, she helped choose what we ate each day, she continued to push me to take care of myself. When she began to force her way out, it almost felt like she was ripping my insides out with her, but she was ready to see this earthly life. She was ready to create her own experiences, live, love and enjoy her life. The afternoon before our trip, to the hospital was beautiful, although I was really aggitated. Mommy called and I demanded she come meet me at the house. I whined so much Eric took me for a ride, on the back roads. Tim Perkinson, Ricky White and Jarod Stark were at the house, when we returned. Oh mommy as well. One look at me and she knew! Mom watched me cook supper, work around the house (which didn’t need to be cleaned), and breathe heavy, occasionally. It didn’t take long for her to look at Eric and say, “We are having a baby tonight, you need to rest up!” Eric turned white as a ghost and almost immediatly went to bed. Poop (Tim’s nickname) stayed with mom and I, to watch the rest of Fried Green Tomatoes. Oh and we can’t forget, we ate marshmallow cream and peanut butter. I was now having contractions 10 to 15 minutes apart. (We all acted like it was no big deal) The next part was hilarious! I don’t know why, but I decided I would drive Tim home. Why, either of them let me drive I will never know. Probably, I was super stubborn and demanded to drive. (Hmmm that sounds about right). It wasn’t that far! I remember the sky was almost black, with a few cirrus clouds, glowing with the reflection of the gigantic full moon! As we slowly creeped up the hill, where the headlights beamed, straight ahead, I had one of the worst contractions, I had ever experienced. About that time I slammed the gas pedal down, forcing my car to almost ramp the hill, heading down to his house. Mom and Poop screamed, then immediately stopped themselves only to hold their breath, in hopes of survival of the small, but tedious road trip. I almost came to a stop, when yep, it hit again and a repeat event happened! When Poop jumped out of the car he was terrified, his face was almost transparent, and all he could say was, “Goodluck, I will see you tomorrow.” The next four hours were touch and go! Until I began hitting the wall and rocking back and forth. Mom went to get Eric and we were off to the hospital! The next morning we had a beautiful baby girl! She was our surprise gift! Our family and friends came to support us. And our lives changed forever! It was an amazing day. You know, as I reflect and visualize for the future, I always want to share with you. LIFE is… What you make it! Eric Drake and I has no idea what we were doing October 2nd 1992! We had very little money, little life experience and yet all we knew is we loved this little human/spirit/baby girl more than words could express. She had colic for her first six weeks of life. I can remember we would trade off sleeping one hour at a time. We had our electric shut off once and our water a couple of times! However, Listen up!!! We made it! Twenty-five years later all those struggles are now funny memories! If you are struggling, right now…Please remember take everything in twos. I know most people will tell you, “One step at a time!” I do agree, but for me it has always been twos. If you can take one step why not two! If you can make it thru two seconds, two minutes, two hours, two days, two weeks!!! You can make it! I know you have sad times and struggles, but you got this!!! I have looked back over my twenty five years with this beautiful young lady and all four of our children and realized the difficult times become diluted and almost more cherished, because they always illuminate a growth period of awesomeness! A time where we all came together, depended on each other and were grateful for the good times!

Life is meant to be lived. You will struggle, you will have losses, but no matter what if you will stop, wait and focus forward in whatever ‘two’ realm you need, at the time; you will be like me and look back over twenty five years in amazement and visualize the future as even better!!! Here’s to you kid! Thanks for the greatest journey from October 2nd 1992, until now! Looking forward to many more adventures and living! I love you Darion Alley Drake!! Thank you for being an amazing daughter!

A Bicycle?

I bought Eric a bike!! For years I have begged my honey to ride bikes with me. Then we were unsure how well I would be able to ride. Therefore, when I rode, the other day, he agreed! I can’t describe the exact emotions I had, when we were shopping. They were something like, a little girl who was buying her best friend a bike so they could play together. I was extremely suttle, I acted like it was no big deal that we were in Scheels, searching for the bike section. You see, he didn’t tell me what we were doing, he just told me to come on we were shopping. (I even whined a little bit because I wanted to stay home).

Anywhooooo…he tries to throw me off. We looked at guns, skateboards 😠, kayaks, and everything else in the store. I finally found a sales rep and said, “Ask him what you are looking for.” (Remember this is a gigantic store, it is beautiful outside and this man has walked my butt all over the store like we were bored or something lol).

Eric asked the man where the bikes were. At that moment, my heart fluttered, I almost teared up and then I giggled and held his hand tight and said, “Sooooo we are looking at bikes?”

“Yes, I think you need a bike with gears. I know that bike you are riding has to be hurting your leg going up all those hills.”

My heart sank for a moment. I looked down as we meandered through to go back downstairs because this store is so gigantic and we just spent an hour, attempting to not look at bikes, but really, we didn’t know where they were. Therefore, now we are walking downstairs, to find the back section, in a corner that seemed like in the north pole! As we approached the bike section I knew in my heart it wasn’t for me. Thank goodness because as you all (who follow my crazy stories) know I love my pink bike and Freddy the Pink Flamingo, does as well.

Eric looks at the price tag and reads it outloud without thinking, who he was with,”On-sale for four hundred ninety nine. Hmmm it was originally six ninety-nine.”

I quickly appeared by his side, peered over his shoulder, and in an astonished, shocked and disapproving voice I said,”WHAT? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?”

In my head:

Hold up! If I am correct about three years ago, I called you almost yelling in the phone, how I had found a pink cupcake bike at Sports Academy, for fifty dollars and I was buying it! I said I would buy you a bike, but I have only budgeted for maybe one hundred and fifty.

Then it happened the swaggy, all dressed up, neat and groomed, sales rep showed up. “Hey, can I help you with something? Do you have any questions?”

In my head again, I am like nope no questions here! We are good. Obviously, we are not avid bikers so, no dude back off and keep your gazillion dollar bike to yourself! Butt… (yes, I intentionally mispelled that) nooooo, Eric says yes…???????

He began asking questions, comparing several different ‘professional’ bikes and asking about what the new electric fangled dangle things were.

The sales person did an excellent job. I will say, by the time we left (without a 500 dollar bike) I was convinced the Electra was the bike to have. It was the cat daddy of bicycles. (Who knew Schwinn wasn’t the best, now). The guy actually reminded me of when I was on a roll in selling @townecraft cookware, it seemed like I couldn’t say the wrong words to the people. They knew how excellent the product was, they could feel how passionate I was about it and therefore they bought it. He was on target! (Also we will probably own one or two someday because we both left asking ourselves if it made that big of a difference). For now we are headed to Walmart.

Skip over this part, if you only want to know about Eric’s bike!

Now let me begin with, “Walmart! I realize you don’t really have to have good customer service nor do you have to treat your employees special, but oh how I wish you did!”

Side note everyone this is my, Teena Drake’s brain so this is a side note. If the Walmart corporation wants to hire me to teach YOU- Owners and head CEO and whoever else that is in charge- How to create a beautiful environment that will encourage people to want to shop at your store my email is Livelove.teena@gmail.com.

I mean I know of very few people who want or desire to shop there anymore. However, we do because…Idk I kind of feel like yes I am getting items cheaper, especially if I am unconcerned about the quality or customer service, but I love the employees and feel like as long as I shop there many people have employment. HOWEVER, it would be awesome to restructure what could be a beautiful thing. (Okay back to the story).

Part Two

We look at several bikes. Some were way up and others trapped in a new system, to I guess ensure no one slides a bicycle under their shirt. We compared having fenders, or not, gears were a must for him. After a great deal of belly, cheek, and head hurting laughter (you know the kind that the hurt feels so good) we had decided on one beautiful, basic, black bicycle. As we were rolling out with it, Eric said, “Wow! Look at that!”

I looked up and in the far corner, tucked away, on the top rack was a beautiful turquoise bike, with brown pleather seat, brown grips on the handle bars, with a bold stitching, Indian prints-pencil thin design stenciled on the side, thin tired, with gears, a bicycle, made for Eric Drake!

We pulled the rack out, somehow figured out how to pull it down (yes we asked for help, but no show), figured out the arm holding it down and there it was! It was beautiful and perfect for my honey bunny! He was the most adorable person, I know that’s not masculine sounding, but remember at this point, my state of mind is, we are two little kids picking out my best friends bicycle so we can go out to play.

We bought it, went home and prepared for an evening ride!

From this point forward I can actual say, “They rode off into the sunset, with gigantic smiles on their faces, a bubbly feeling of child like excitement, and lived HAPPILY EVER AFTER!

Please if you learn nothing else from my writings learn this!

You do deserve the very best!

You are amazing!

You are a GIFT from God that loves you no matter what!

Last point (for now)- Life is too short! Have fun while you are here. If riding a bicycle creates happiness for you, do it and if you have a partner who is willing to play with you, do it! No matter what it is you enjoy…DO IT!

God Bless

LiveloveLLC

Email Livelove.teena@gmail.com

All of us will do what we want to do…

When I first heard that statement it was from one of my precious students. Her life, in my eyes, was terrible! She had been in and out of Foster homes, only to end up with family, who were fighting over her and her brother.

I can hear our conversation as clear as if it happened, five minutes ago. We spent several afternoons talking, Sometimes I think she skipped going on field trips because if I wasn’t going she knew we would paint or do some kind a fun lab, where she could research on the computer. Most of the time she would end up coming back to my desk and tell me stories of her horrific past. But never in a devastion manner. It was always the good in almost every situations.

The day she stopped and said, “Mrs. Drake, everyone does what they want to do, they know the possible outcomes and choose what’s best for them.

This was a wrap up from her telling me why she was taken from one of the Foster homes.

As I sat down, tears fell from eyes like a river overflowing, out of her banks. I remember reflecting back through some of her stories.

For example, I asked her, “Why she didn’t tell someone?”

Her response was sharp and she giggled through it which made it a bit comical, she said, “Mrs. Drake when you get a whoopin everytime you opened your mouth, wouldn’t you learn to keep your mouth shut?”

Once again, “We all do what we want to do!”

Good or bad, she was correct. To avoid a whoopin or to avoid a conflict we will always do what we want to do, BUTT! What about in everyday life? Does that statement still apply?

Of course it does! We go to the same old job and hate life creating misery all around us, yet we all do what we want to do! For our good or not so good, we do choose. If you began on a path a long time ago and it abruptly came to an end what would you do you would choose…choose what?

Idk but it will be your choice! And either way if you choose to always see the positive and best, like my friend, your life will continue to improve each day.

If you are in a valley right now, look up. Don’t look down in shame, look up the worst is behind you! You did what you wanted to do! Now you are here and if you will Look Up, you will come out of the valley with great force!

Too powerful of a message to continue…God Bless

LiveloveLLC

When my child is sick…

All of my new writings, vlogs and blogs are from an inspiration I received from a life changing event. However, I will admit I have to ask myself those WHYS????? when one of my babies are sick or feel broken. You know the why’s I am talking about. Why do good parents or any parents have to lose a child either in illness or tragic accident. Why can’t very good ‘parental’ candidates give birth to five, six and sometimes seven children? Yet, two people who love each other with all their hearts and are financially stable can not get pregnant? And my answer is…

I don’t know. All I do know is when my child is sick those questions rerurn. Then I have to stop, pray and meditate. Do I always receive my answers? 99.9% of the time I do, immediatly! That small fraction of time I have to wait a small amount of longer. That’s why I am sharing this message with all of you today. So the next time I write or say something that you wish were true becuase you don’t believe me, when I say your life is meant to live feeling good and having fun. Ready? Here it goes… (I am really nervous and almost sick to my stomach)…

Mourning I understand. However, living in a mourning state or a questioning state of why me? Why mine? Grrrrrr I hate this life ect…is similar to wishing you didn’t have that encounter, child, parent, grandparent, animal ALL PHYSICAL LOSS OF A LOVED ONE HURTS!

However, to not continue to live to be happy while you are here on earth is like saying I wish I didn’t have this experience because the good times did not out weigh the pain I I I I feel, (Yes a strong accent is on I) from losing you.

As I was writing this my good friend called and I took a short break. As I explained what I was about to write about she said, “Teena the best explanation will come out of your message. (Paused) Just remember to include if I die tomorrow and I am happy today then it’s been a good life.”

Please do not criticize or feel agitated with my message. I am going to warn you against reading it in my excerpt. But also right here…Do not read any further if you do not want to hear/read this message. Because I promise it is pure.

To my dear friends who have suffered great hurt, I am sorry, with all of my heart. The strong love we have for one another is absolutely incedible. I know I am a wife, mother, sister, in law, daughter, niece, grand daughter. I have suffered loss and I have questioned the why’s!!! I have felt pain physical, emotional, and all the rest as well. However, that is not my desire or my good feeling vibration. I choose not to allow those precious encounters throughout my life to become a burden, due to my own pain. Instead I choose to live based on the positive, funny, wonderful impression, learning experience, joy and pure ‘happiness’ they have brought to my life. And how dull my very existence would be without having those people/animals in my life.

My grandfather created the love I have for travel. Him and my grandma rode my BMW motorcycle to at least 40 states, if not more. My grandmother taught me songs to always warm my heart, how to can vegetables, so my family would never grow hungry, and how to follow my intuition or as she called it your gut feeling. Of course my most recent loss Matthew Reed took me by a shock. Although I and many others still mourn him today, I always return to his zest for life, his genuine kindness and his funny disposition always comes shining thru. Him finding a solution for every problem like the slide is too dry so to keep from burning your butt pee on it first!! I burst into laughter everytime I write that or look at their picture!

This message isn’t to hurt you, but to free you. And to free them. They love you!!!! But they want you to feel good and be happy!

Fast forward your life no matter what age you are right now. You are now 113! (13 is my favorite number). You ride around with your sparkly golf cart, around the whipper snappers who are 85 and above and you are enjoying life. And you hit a stump fly off your golf cart, hit your head and die. If you have very many desendents left, especially young ones, and they mourned over you year after year, instead of discussing all the funny times you had or great gifts you brought them while they were growing up. Instead it was almost like they wished you never existed because your death is all they can remember. Would you want that? Does that give you a good feeling?

I feel like such a broken record and trust me times like now, I understand the sadness and hurt all of us have endured. However, I must keep telling you over and over feel good right now. Feel inspired today and if you don’t feel inspired then stop and smell the roses or take time to meditate. Catch the feeling good frequency.

God loves you no matter what!!!

Livelove

I must apologize to my family, friends and the transgender who I met in the doctor’s office…

Yesterday, was a great day!! You ask why I want to apologize? Oh keep reading! After you have finished laughing until you cry, then hopefully you will accept my apology.

The scene:  the sun is bright, heat index high, it is 9 A.M., and I am in my car with the sunroof open. Yes, it is one hot day in Kansas City, Ladies and Gentleman, but I am loving it. I didn’t realize my appointment was at 9:15 therefore, my hair is in a messy bun and I look like a kindergarten teacher with my free flowing Hawaiian dress on. Although I am a bit rushed, I feel terrific. 

Then the song that just says everything I am feeling, at the moment, comes on the radio. My mind is freely thinking and planning for my upcoming ‘Be Happy’ seminars. I am contemplating the first song to have playing, extremely loud, when the audience enters this most amazing conference. Think Teena Think!!! What song would be fun, uplifting, sets the fun filled event to help people relax and let go? Oh my goodness…the beat just started thumping and I began dancing, yes in my car. Oh I almost forgot, the song was “Who let the dogs out.” 

When the song came on,  I turned it up and began singing, dancing in my seat and waving my arms like I was the rapper/ singer myself. “Who Let the Dogs Out? Who? Who? Who?  Who Let the Dogs Out? Who? Who? Who?”

I sounded great, as far as I was concerned. I was engrossed in the song, feeling the beat, singing what words I knew, laughing dancing just having fun with me, myself, and I.

Why would I apologize? As much fun as I was having and was lost in ‘me,’  I shook my head up and down, then side to side, I was sitting at a red light, next to the gigantic Sprint Company Sign; when I glanced to my left there was a a driver starring at me. I didn’t think too much about it, but of course I had to look again. (Still rocking out like a crazy women) I glanced back to my left only to see someone videoing me, in my crazy, dancing, having hysterical fun state. I stopped for a split second, smiled real big and yelled have a great day. What??? Why do I care? 

To be honest I didn’t until this morning! I realized, if someone posted that video my family and friends might be a bit upset with me. Therefore, I am taking the time to write and apologize. I realize my life has changed. Yes, I have always been happy, but my happy now is living life to the fullest. If the music moves me well so be it. If dancing like a crazy lady is what I feel at that moment, yep I am going to dance. Therefore, if the video is posted and you happen to see it, just mark it up for that’s my mommy, daughter, wife, friend, Mrs. Drake or Teena; you either love her or you don’t. 

As for the beautiful transgender in the waiting room. I am sorry for not complimenting how beautiful you looked in pink. We had a great conversation about Ebay and I enjoyed our moment of conversation. However, I hesitated to say anything about your outfit why? Honestly, I didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable and I feared some of the people might have made you feel that away. Therefore, if you ever read this, you looked beautiful and you had my favorite color on. My message to you is live on, be free and love yourself! I apologize for not saying anything. 

Feel good today! Take time to dance in the car, sing to the top of your lungs, dance in the rain and love one another. If someone is watching or videoing you let them, they may need the pick me up. 

God Bless!

Livelove4ever!!! 

 

Strippers? 

I titled this writing for a very specific reason. I have been studying marketing strategies for my new business and my discoveries have been astonishing. As I have said before, good advertising and marketing experts are fearless. I unfortunately did not receive this particular talent. I am bubbly and great at one on one sells, if and only if someone seeks me out. Which poses a dilemma for my company. Therefore, I have spent a multitude of hours searching, observing and studying people’s reactions to post, how many likes, comments ect.

I have watched politics on a federal, state and even a county level become illuminated on social media. I have observed how the news grabs our attention and place mostly fear into our paradigms. (They also replay the same old horrific stories over and over again.) However, this last topic really freaked me out, how much attention it received. Strippers Celebrate by Counting Their trashbags full of Money! 

Why did this freak me out? Honestly, it wasn’t the post, my Ashby posted, it was the OVER 300 OR MORE responses. I was tagged in it and finally watched it. I thought well they are happy and that’s a good thing. Then as I began to respond to my daughter in a funny way, (because if you know her she is not an advocate for taking off her clothes in front of men, to please them. She could do it, because she is beautiful, but one bikini contest and she was like nope nope nope not for me). 

What happened next is where I became freaked out. She had 100s of comments. Each time I attempted to type a comment it would say more comments are loading. I read maybe three or four. Those, in particular, ranged from a positive shout out to say hell yea you go ladies to a lengthy response of how bad this profession is or these women are ect…

Now I am not disputing anyone’s comment and nor did I read who posted what. However, I am wondering about the marketing strategy here. Wonderful people places and events are presented or posted each day yet strippers ‘Being Happy’ caught a wide variety of peoples attention, and not very many supportive ones. 

I do have a quick story to share with you to take up for my friends, who chose their career path that was unconventional. I was 18 years old working at a little restaurant in Po Folks. A group of ladies came in at least ten of them. They were laughing and chit chatting amongst each other. None of the other waitress wanted to wait on them, so I said I would take them. What happened next was FABULOUS! They stayed an hour past my shift, ate and were  simply a blast to wait on. Their entire bill was probably 120 dollars (Po FolKS was not known for their expensive meals just good home cooked food and sweet tea.) When they left we all hugged and they assured me they would be back and only ask for me! Guess what? When I went home that day, I realized the hour in a half was well worth the extra time. Above and beyond the other tips, those ladies tipped me 150 dollars! Guess what? They were strippers!!! Did I know that at first? No! I just treated them like anyone else. Were they beneath me? No just a group of women who were comfortable with themselves and they laughed more than any other customers I had ever had. 

I told you that story to end with this message!!! I don’t care what you choose to be when you grow up. However, be careful what you choose to read or respond to. Before you click on a post or read an article think how it is going to directly affect your thoughts and attention. The goal is to be happy, but if you only feel the need to read about negative or horrific stories, then that is what you will have to talk about. Before you know it you will be living in that judgmental, concerned with others, hateful, critical life. Is that a fun frequency? Not for me.

As for marketing I guess I will just need to keep sending out positive vibes. As for those people who  continue to desire a better life they will seek me out. 

Your real message here is…BE HAPPY WITH YOU! if you don’t like where you are at this point change it. Don’t pass judgement on others, just find your laughter and the rest will take care of itself.

God loves you no matter what!! Yes, even strippers!!! God Bless You and have a great day!!!