Your children conform to your expectations! As I spend hour after hour working with children of all walks of life and across the globe, I have learned, probably the MOST IMPORTANT, parenting skill…that ALL PARENTS NEED TO KNOW!
Are you ready for this?
The words that come out of your mouth as a parent, form and transform YOUR CHILDREN!
I realize this seems obvious and simplistic, especially when discussing as complex of a role as, PARENTING!However, my research is complete and it is 100 percent true!
Scenario 1: I had not met this young man before. His father & my honey have worked together for many years, since the boy was 2 yrs. old.
But all I ever heard was how much he bragged on his baby boy. All throughout the years I would here how ‘good’ he was. How talented, amazing and terrific.
Never once did I hear or even imagine… he had any disabilities OR was abandoned by his mother…who actually told him once, “The drugs are better than being a mommy to you!” (This was told to me as an example of the positivity, one parent, can utilize and redirect their child’s life).
Thirteen years later, I had the privilege to meet Nikolas, for the first time. You, as the reader of this post, now know as much as I knew about Nik, until this past summer.
As the gangly, long hair (Peter Frampton style), sweet, soft spoken and might I add, DYNAMIC, young man approached the swimming pool deck he introduced himself.
At that moment my mom & I were ecstatic to meet him. We did the regular introductions and he began a conversation about swimming. Nothing out of the ordinary.
Then I mentioned (off handed) I am so excited to finally meet the awesome Nikolas, I have heard about for so long.
He replied with, “Thank you! Everywhere we go someone tells me how my dad brags on me. He is one amazing dad!”
He has lived in several states and told us of all the people he had met. And yes they all told him the same thing.
Let me ask you something? If someone were to repeat what or how you describe your kids…what would they say? How would they describe/repeat YOUR WORDS?
I knew this young man had some difficult challenges throughout his life, but I promise his dad had genuinely talked his son up soooo much that those possible ‘issues’ didn’t even appear.
I never even questioned his learning difficulties nor thought of them. I only included the two known hurdles that this young man had, to demonstrate how influential his dad’s description was…EVEN WHEN THEY WERE SEPERATED for work.
You see…we already know our downfalls, even as children. So why not illuminate the good in our children & ourselves? And watch the GOODNESS shine?
Parents! Perfection is impossible. Even in you!
Begin at this very moment to write all the GOOD about your child. Leave out the other and watch the GOODNESS GROW LIKE A BOUNTIFUL GARDEN!
This works with adult children as well! It almost seems as though by highlighting their terrific qualities the irritating ones disappear. Same with yourself!
Need a Sunshine Message for you or sent to someone? Email me or mail your request/donation to: Sunshine Messages P.O.Box 173 Milton Ky. 40045.
Everyone has down times, our mission is to ensure you know that no matter what…This Too Shall Pass & We urge you to…
When people begin to become uncomfortable they tend to say I am unhappy or sad. Which is a needed emotion to appreciate the thrilling moments throughout life. The key is to decide how long do you want to stay unhappy or sad. In other words yes, you will experience times of sadness in your life, even once you begin to live in a happy and appreciative state, 99 percent of the time. However, those moments become minimal when you remember, “The best for me will always be!”
Are you still doubting the possibility of living happy 99 percent of the time?
Okay, Google it…Is it possible to be happy all the time? Or the majority of the time?
(The theme song of Jeopardy is playing in my head)
What did you find? Was the answer clear? Yes or No?
Yet, although you researched it, are you happy with whichever answer you chose? Based on what? Evidence? Personal Emotions? Historical Events?
The truth is it didn’t matter to Google your objective opinion, you ask a question and Google provided you with a beautiful array of choices to choose from. As well as added on a few ‘different’ perspectives, in case you didn’t find the answer which resonated with you.
Wow! Did you know life is the same way? You shout out, “I want to be happy” or “How can I be wealthy so then I can be happy?” Maybe, “I want love, peace, comfort.”
Go ahead, try again…Google it!
(Again, the theme song of Jeopardy is playing in my head)
It is true anything you are searching for or focusing on will appear in one form or another. Whether you search it, meditate on it, or just think about it. Think about your last search. What KEY WORDS did you use? Those are your key thoughts. If they are serving you well, then stick to it, you are on the right track. However, if those key words/thoughts are not continuously returning your mind to a more pleasant place, it might be time to go back and perform another search.
If you were searching for something, on the internet, for work or any other reason and your first search was a flop, would you just give up and shut down the computer? Never to search again?
That may seem a bit dramatic. But let me ask you something…Is this what you do to your beautiful thoughts and ideas when they appear? Do you shut them down by reflecting to your past and ‘Proving’ to yourself this will never work? Yet, every time you hear about this topic your heart sings?
It is time to treat your life-like you do your Google Search. If you do not receive the desired results at first…change your key words and search until you reach your desired destination!
Okay Google…spell Success- T-E-E-N-A! (Put your name in place of mine. Doesn’t that feel TERRIFIC!)
If you would like to hear more about finding and keeping your own happiness in all of life’s situations email us… Livelove.email@example.com or Google us (haha) Www.Livelovellc.org/home
Or maybe you need a little umph put back into your life. Then Happy Coaching from Livelove LLC is something to check into. It is always positive, present and future oriented and most of all, personalized just for you!
When you go to the closet and pick up a pair of pants, that do not fit any longer, do you continue to wear them? If you do attempt to ‘make do’ does it become disastrous?
At one time, I worried about being too fat, not good enough and was terribly unsatisfied with the way my clothes fit. I decided to become dedicated to the cause. I worked out and felt terrific. I reached my goals and felt pretty good about myself.
However, I had this one pair of pants! They were my favorite pair. Black silky material, elastic waist, balloon pant legs which created an illusion, I was wearing a long evening gown, but they were functional. I would tell the kids they were my ‘Fancy Pants.’ I truly did love this pair of pants.
Therefore I continued to wear them. Who cared, if they were five sizes too big. No one else knew, just me. As I daydream back to the day I remember my honey bunny saying, “When are you going to get rid of those pants?! They are hanging off of you and if you aren’t careful they will fall down in front of your class!”
What did he know about fashion? I didn’t pay any attention to his nonsense. I arrived at work early and whistled as I walked into the front door. “Good Morning, Ms. Connie,” I cheerfully said as I scooted past her office, in my flowy pants.
The day went wonderful. All of my lessons were going as planned and life couldn’t be better. My planning time came and it was time for lunch. As I nonchalantly danced by the office I heard a deep, male voice call out my name, “Mrs. Drake?”
I jumped a bit and then I heard, “We need your help in the office.”
As much as I wanted to play sick and run back to my classroom, I didn’t. I never wanted to upset Ms. Connie, she is the best.
Turns out she had left due to a family emergency and I was the only ‘warm body’ who could fill in, at least until after my planning period. Which might I add, it was always a short planning time, until today! This day seemed like forty-five minutes was forty-five days.
Of course I quickly found myself sitting in ‘THE CHAIR’ the one where all the phone calls come in, the parents, grandparents, step parents, sick kids, medicated students, vomiting teachers, and last but not freaking least the INTERCOM SYSTEM! I may seem a bit dramatic, but the office manager, in my opinion, has the most difficult job of any in the school system.
The first parent arrived within five minutes of me sitting down. She said in a meek little voice and shaky hands, “Yes, my daughter is in 6th grade and she left her book bag at home. Soooo I wanted to bring it to her…”
I quickly interrupted in a flustered voice, “What? Who did you say? You are going to have to speak up and what class is she in?”
Oh for goodness sakes that one took me fifteen minutes. Including that ordeal, I had four teachers, one cafeteria assistant calling me and the outside calls, were rolling over to an email, faster than I could answer.
It was my last five minutes and a dad buzzes at the door. I let him in, he requested to pick up his son in 6th grade. Most organized human I had dealt with in the past forty minutes. He knew which class at the correct time and spoke up. Pleased with my survival skills through the past few events…I smile really big and I politely say, “Thank you for being so organized and I will call your son up at this time.” (I almost sounded like a robot).
I call the classroom, no he is not in there. Hmmm maybe this dad made a mistake. This continues on for a couple of times. I am now using the intercom and telephone when he yells out, “OH I am so sorry, I forgot he is in seventh grade, he is in math!”
He yelled so loud I fell back into the roller chair, that I had been attempting to spin back and forth in, to accomplish more, in a shorter amount of time. When I fell I zoomed backwards towards Ms. Connie’s desk and quickly spun around, placing my elbows on the desk and hands under my chin. “I am sorry, I didn’t quite catch that?”
He repeated it in a much calmer and embarrassed voice, “My son is in the seventh grade, I am so sorry…”
As he continued to apologize I had become a little smirky and to be blunt I was ticked off. I spun around to turn my back to this man, whom I was upset with. Placed both feet firmly on the ground…pushed my behind up using both hands and my body.
AND…as fast as I stood up, my pants came plummeting down. Yes, down to my knees! My bare behind was there for this man and whoever else wanted to see! I quickly plopped back down, as I gasped for air! Not only were they down, the bottom of my right pant leg was tightly wound around the wheel. I wasn’t going anywhere.
I remember I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry and the man, he turned around and walked out in the hall. Probably to laugh so hard he had to pee his pants! Mr. Genton heard me laughing hysterically, as I grabbed my stomach and bent over to attempt and free my pants leg! Of course he helped the father find his son and all he could say between his tears of hysterical laughing, was, “Why do you wear pants that are clearly to big?”
I hope you are now laughing too! This is absolutely a true story. I guess now most of you know why, when someone suggests me working in an office, I laugh and politely decline.
You see, not only were my pants too big, but I was attempting to fill even greater shoes.
Are you doing the same thing in life? Are you continuing to wear the old YOU, who doesn’t fit anymore? It isn’t about the size, it’s about the fit. Isn’t it time you find your own shoes to fill? And if you are hanging on to those old clothes, ask yourself, “Do I want to return to this person or am I okay with brand new and a better fit?”
If the world is continually rotating that means there is never a stagnant moment. Meaning CHANGE is inevitable.
Sometimes we hold ourselves to ‘way back then’ so long, we forget to experience the now and forever more. When you fit in your own skin, life feels pretty TERRIFIC!
God Loves YOU NO MATTER WHAT!
I am so excited about this great adventure. I would love for you to come along and see all the beautiful stops we are making along the way! If you need a little umf in your life e-mail me at Livelove.firstname.lastname@example.org
A New Service for you: Angel Card Readings they are fun and always enlightening. Of course we continue to offer workshops and Happy Coaching.
The most important part of our business is assisting you in finding your happiness!
I recently wrote an article entitled, A Simple Message, about the one common strand ‘meaning’ of the holiday season. Which I have found that common strand is LOVE! Whether you celebrate Christmas or not.
Which continues to be the true meaning of the season, for me. However, the story of Christmas is one of the sweetest and most miraculous stories of all.
As I anxiously, await for my children to come barreling in my room and wake me up, I close my eyes and attempt to imagine the birthday of baby Jesus. (Yes, I know my children are all adults, but my babies they will forever be!)
Just think doing your regular duties and a big bright star shines super bright. Angels appear throughout the night, gifts were brought and a beautiful baby boy is born. His story has been told in many languages and is celebrated in a multitude of places.
The season is about love, but Christmas to me will always be about thanking God for sending this world a baby, baby Jesus. His message has always been strong, his story illuminates love, peace and strength.
Let me ask you something? Do you think they were always strong? Do you believe that Mary and Joseph knew HOW they were going to make it? No, the answer is no! They had no idea how they were going to do this. Nor where. They endured a great deal and yet they survived and went on to leave a Legacy.
As you celebrate Christmas…think about the sweet story of the birth of Jesus and the Love he brought to this world. However, also think of the entire story and how much and how many people were affected.
I don’t believe is was all lollipops and rainbows for the shepherds, Inn Keeper, Wise Men or Mary and Joseph. They were in a rough environment and in today’s society the family would be considered less fortunate. However, they had all they needed! A sweet baby boy who would change the world forever!
If you are in a bad spot or down and out this Christmas. Please pause, then try to remember a happy time in your past. Maybe an old tradition or just get out your Bible and read the sweetest story ever. I don’t know how, but I do know what! Merry Christmas my friend, you are loved, no matter what!
God Loves you
Jesus does too!
Happy Birthday Sweet Baby Jesus, we will try to exemplify your meaning and Love, Love, Love one another!
Email me if you would like to start the year off with, two free weeks of Happy Coaching.
What? It is December 8th! 2017! I am not sure what to even say other than…YIPPEE, WOW, YAHOO, YES, HELL YES, LET’S DO THIS, I GOT THIS,!
Yes, I am a bit ecstatic today! Why, You ask? Because I am alive and well! I am celebrating the one year mark of yes, a tragic moment in my life, however, I must call it a celebration anniversary!
I learned one year ago, this is my life and I am going to live it! And…everything will work out, no matter what!
I learned so much in my year of recuperating that I have decided to collect my learnings and share with you! I feel grateful, fortunate, happy, excited and most of all in AWE! Awe of the delicious new adventures, the people being placed in my life daily and how simple this life can be as well as FUN, FUN FUN!
I could make this the longest winded posting ever! However, I choose to pause…inhale very deep…hold it…exhale! Now I leave you with this thought…
Live today like it is your last. Not by being extravagant or boisterous. More like being grateful and happy! Each time you want to creep back into the cob webs of your paradigm, pause then ask yourself, “Is this a good feeling memory or not one I want to relive?”
Then decide your next step. Meaning, if this was your last day (even if for just a brief moment, near death) you would choose your feelungs, emotions and experiences ever so wisely. You would ensure you were smiling and Mmmmm, you would want to remember a delicious, savory moment! (Exhale and enjoy).
Take the time today to choose your life. Choose your experiences, tell others about your choice and allow the journey to begin!
After tonight, Livelove’s grand debut, I am going to introduce myself and the business with the simple, four letter word that so many take for granted, HAPPY!
If you do nothing else today…Be Happy for one moment and set yourself up to receive more, Happy.
You are awesome!
Check us out we are improving our company day by day!
Chose this picture because these were all given to me to comfort me, in my time if weakness! I am truly blessed!
Of course I woke up at 4:30 in the morning, on the farm. However, this time I do not have to roll out of bed and start the Turkey. So I rolled over, tossed and turned for over an hour, finally slipped out of bed.
The sun was peeking up over the hill creating a sparkly blanket of frost across the land. As almost if old man Frost wanted to freeze time, even if for just a moment, to allow those of us up, to observe in amazement, his works.
Normally, when ‘back on the farm’ I am rushing around, barking orders, freaked out because something needs to be done, but this year I am not. Instead, I am enjoying the dancing moments where past meets the present and future is so boldly introducing herself! (In a good way).
I relish in the memories of laughters, tears, excitement and all other emotions attached to every crack, bump, or splashed syrup on the ceiling stains, still not fixed from previous years. As I reflect back I remember all the funny events of Thanksgivings. Once we moved to the river Eric knew when Baw Baw couldn’t, I would!
We have had family gatherings from Thanksgiving, Christmas, all the way to hey, its finally Spring, let’s have a get together. I remember one year, I counted 50 people and other than my farm family, there were maybe three other relatives, the rest were our adopted family members. (Which we tried counting the other day, how many of those we have. It made us laugh and get all sentimental because the number was too difficult to solidify. We would become so wrapped up in naming someone and then attaching a fun or funny story, that the list continues to grow).
Sorry, Eric tells me all the time I get off on tagents, that was one of them.
Today, Thanksgiving Day 2017 is a bit different. The kids were all busy, Eric & I just arrived and have been in paradise for so long we struggled with returning to 21 degrees. So I am so excited that I get to go celebrate with one of my favorite little girls!!! My niece Lucy!
Although change isn’t always easy, it is inevitable. As for me I choose to embrace the changes, make the most of the new opportunities, revel over the past, enjoy the now…this moment.
Maybe you are like me and you are sitting on your front porch, wrapped up in something similar to a cacoon, listening to the Crows call, and you want to be sad for a moment due to the ‘change’ in traditions. However, I ask you to tilt your head from one side and then the other, close your eyes…hold them shut for one extra moment. Now open them and wait for your eyes to refocus. What do you see? A different perspective.
Don’t worry about ‘creating’ a new Tradition, that can sometimes create more anxiety than good, but rather enjoy right now! Whether you are with one person or several, maybe you are alone, it doesn’t matter search to feel good, this moment, feel terrific. Then expect another terrific moment and another and before you can blink your eyes, this day will be another memory! Hopefully even better than you expected.
If someone forgets to tell you today: ” YOU! Are AWESOME, WORTHY, LOVABLE and AMAZING!
I can smell the bacon sizzling, eggs a cracking, batters being whipped and beaten. Come about four o’clock in the morning, Thanksgiving morning. I would slip down the stairs as quietly as the old crickety floor would let me and slowly, ever so slowly, open the door at the bottom of the steps. Sliding my small little girl body through a sliver of an opening, to ensure I did not awaken my mom and dad, who were on the hide-a-way sofa in the, soon to be magical dining room.
As my bare feet touched the cold floor, I would cringe, drawing it back in hopes I would not groan so loudly, to wake everyone up. As I approached the opening to the doorway of the kitchen, I could hear her clanking the pans (as quietly as she could) and almost methodically dancing, in her house robe like a glowing angelic human. If I didn’t disturb her and freeze like a statue, I could hear her lightly singing a sweet hymn. Usually something like, Thank you Lord, for saving my soul or I will walk with Him and I will talk with him….
I try to hold my breath for as long as possible, so I can hear and watch her for just one more minute, only to slip on a rug, lose my balance and come sliding in the kitchen, butt first. She basically, keeps going and says, “Teena Gay, what are you doing up it is too early and you will be cranky before Thanksgiving dinner is served!”
As I began to whine and explain how excited I was and I rambled on, she seem to forget what she had said and would start talking to herself. Almost as if a check list was in her head and not even I could get her off track (Which if you know me I can get anyone off track, most of the time).
Mmmmmmmmm, can you smell it? I can! I can smell the green beans a bubbling, the turkey browning, the sweet pies a cooling. One by one a family member would emerge. Poppy would slip down the steps, wrap his arms around Baw Baw, giving her a reverse hug and a sweet peck on the cheek. She would always stop, pause and embrace his hugs and his kisses.
You know as I sit and write this I can’t help, but pause, close my eyes and as the tears stream down my face, I give thanks! I am grateful for these precious memories.
I remember thinking my grandmother was super woman! You know, I might be wrong, but until my Poppy passed away I think she cooked the majority of the food. I know we all pitched in something throughout the years, but honestly that was Violet Ashby’s legacy! Not just Thanksgiving Dinners, but bringing people together, by opening her home and preparing the most delicious, blessed and cooked with love meal anyone could ever imagine.
The time would quickly come, when those who weren’t in town, would begin to arrive. Oh the smiles on everyone’s face. The big hugs that seem to be never ending as the back screen door would open and SLAM, directly behind anyone who entered. Greetings, greetings!!!! It was like a house full of laughter and the energy was so strong it seemed as though, our farm home was coming to life celebrating hundreds of years of family, would vibrate and glow.
Finally, it was time to eat. Now most of the time as we all gathered around the ‘big people’s’ table or the ‘kids’ table off to the side (I don’t think I sat at the big people’s table until after I was an adult of like 25! Lolololol), the room would be so loud, Forman Hamilton who was the neighbor down the road, could hear us. However, once my Poppy, Uncle Bob, or Uncle Rod said, “Let’s bless this food…”
We all stopped talking and immediately grabbed hands and bowed our heads. It was like a snap of the fingers when it happened! Next, BRING ON THE FOOD!!! Heavenly Ham, terrific turkey, goodness gracious gravy, pluffy potatoes, stupendous slaw & stuffing and Pie, pie, pie! Did I forget to mention Butterscotch PIE!
We would all pass the food around the table: macaroni and cheese oh my!
As Thanksgiving approaches, enjoy each person you are with. Take time to put your phones down and turn off your technology for just a moment and record those smells, laughters, moment by moment sounds and events in your memory bank. Because you can never relive this time again. Next year will be different. It may not seem much different, but it will be. Everyone will be a year older, have new perspectives, some will pass others will be born, no matter what the only way you can relive a memory, is create one!
The funniest thing happened to me today! Totally unexpected! Before Eric left for work he was kind of sad and so was I! We had been together so much lately, we didn’t want to be separated for long periods of time and that long drive was not near as much fun, alone. As soon as the garage door shut, I opened my computer. As I searched for flights home, I became quickly discouraged. Three and four hundred dollars, ONE WAY!
I closed my computer and went on packing the car. I shrugged my shoulders and thought that was silly. As I began to pour my first cup of coffee, I said to myself, “I seriously would wait to go home, if I could ride with my honey, but my ticket would have to be between one hundred and twenty, no more than 150.”
As I began to rest a moment before leaving, I decided to open my computer and look up some black Friday sales. After being logged in about five minutes, a message showed up stating, “Kentucky to Kansas one fifty-five.”
I will admit, at first the twilight zone began to play, in my head. I thought about all the new marketing techniques, but then my attention was quickly diverted back to more information on this flight. As I read it, I text mom to ask her opinion, text Eric and danced around in front of the computer like a butterfly. Oh, what do I do? I felt a little bit anxious. I know I don’t need to spend the money. I read detail for detail again! Then it happened! I received yet another incentive taking it down below one hundred dollars! My excitement and freakiness were growing. I hadn’t heard from mom or Eric, tried to call Nick to ensure he wouldn’t be mad at me, no answer. Finally, I pushed that tiny little button to purchase. Then itinerary wouldn’t show until I selected the day. It was bizarre! It turns out everyone was fine with my decision. No one was upset and I was able to ride home with Eric.
However, this situation created a unique thought process. I continually study the law of attraction, the teachings of a wide variety of religions and how it all relates to each of us. This one event is among many. Ask and it shall be given. What about you? Haven’t you had an experience similar to this one?
The reason for the title? Because isn’t it true? Have you ever said, “I want? Or I fear? Or whatever you have said, you watched it come to fruition. Not necessarily about someone else, but you,
As I scribed story after story about my husband’s beautiful family, it was difficult to stay on task. Not because they were dull, but due to the fact everything they spoke came to fruition. “We are going to get married. We are moving out of this trailer, into a new home. We are moving to the country. We are moving to Hawaii!”
(Just to provide you with a small synopsis so you can follow along.)
But truly these two teenagers were destined for failure if they based their future on the past. They didn’t come from a great deal of money and they were young and dumb.
I can add to their list from above, ten times or more. They may have had some rough times, but both of them would refer back to, “How good they had it and how fabulous their lives are now.”
They spoke it and it evolved. I am not so powerful as to snap my fingers or say abracadabra, however, it is true- speak it and speak it enough and it will appear.
I know I seem to say it over and over again, I can’t help it, “Live life, ask for what you want, enjoy each other and Be Happy!!!!”
Okay everyone you all should know (because you are a bad blogger, social media guru, author, wife, oh I almost forgot even better a BAD human if you don’t keep up with a million posts, birthdays, anniversaries, moms, dads, aunts…Oh you get the point!)
Anywhoooooo, you may know it is me and my husbands twenty fifth anniversary, today! Yes, November 13 we were married on Friday the 13th!! Because it is my lucky day, if that freaks you out, you might want to stop reading this particular post. Why? You ask? You see my dear friend this won’t be a tribute to how wonderful the past 25 years have been and how he is my hero! But rather a few funny things that enter my mind when you are celebrating your twenty fifth anniversary! with another human. That human who began with you on a journey full of lust, more lust, more sex, and YES EVEN MORE SEX! So keep reading, if you so dare because I am on a roll this morning in paradise and you never know what is going to come out of these fingers 😉!
My first thought of the morning is, on this marvelous anniversary is, get up early so I can clean up and smell good and feel all rarrrrr sexy!!! Mmmmm I am feeling frisky!!! HOLD UP!!! Were you actually about to believe that horse sh_t (Look, I know people cuss and actually in an ‘adult environment I am kind of bad with a couple of my favorites! However, some of the people who I respect in this world are so good to me, that I never want to offend them. Even if they never understand what the hell I am talking about, because I am the weirdest family member they have! You understand, right?).
Where was I? Oh I get up early because doodie calls! Literally, it’s time to pee at 6 am!!! “Come on, it’s my 25th a__ hole, you couldn’t let me sleep a little bit longer?”
Okay, get up, slip on Hawaiian dress, screech open the stuck door that when it opens the entire neighborhood knows, Teena is up her bladder named butthead and butt named donkey are at it again.
I take care of my business…and I pause and think, “Maybe, I should take an early morning shower, he might feel like twenty five years ago. (I drift off back to when hard ons were like the jungle. You saw them as never ending).
Then I thought he probably will wake up feeling frisky, but what about me? (I switch back from my day dream, look in the mirror) I say, “Ehhh it’s early and I probably have to go again, so I have got time to decide for now I will take a nap!”
I mean I was correct on my decision, I did have to get up again in like 30 minutes. Hence, that’s why I am writing this post. I mean I honestly do feel all gooey and ooey about my honey bunny and I am truly more in love with him now, than I was twenty five years ago. Fortunately, we have made it!!!
But come on yall veterans, at this 25 years and beyond! All that hoopla was horse sh_t! Yes, you still love that man if you made it through twenty five years. Yes, you have been through some hard times that won’t seem to leave you alone. YES HOPEFULLY, you have had some good sex, that’s like a cool breeze that will taunt you forever! (If you can’t hear the tune in my head that keeps playing, it is John Denver ‘ Some Days are Diamonds and Some Days are Stone!)
But I must say I am here at twenty five years of celebrating and to be honest I can’t believe some of you woman who have lied and said, ” Ohhh it gets better just hang on one more day it gets better!”
When they for d_mn sure knew it is, what it is!
It is an accomplishment!!!!!!
I will give you that! But everyone’s like what are you going to do on the ‘day’? Don’t you guys want to ‘do’ something together? Like a romantic dinner or sex on the beach or sit and sweetly tell one another how amazing he or she has been for the past 25 years.
Listen up!! If you haven’t told him or her how amazing they are a great deal of the time over the past 25 years — YOU AREN’T CELEBRATING YOUR 25TH ANNIVERSARY! Nope not happening.
Okay, so the funniest questions we have had and I say ‘we’ because I have heard Eric get asked the same questions, are, “Omg, how did you do that? That is so awesome! What is your secret?”
Let’s get one thing straight there are no dag on secrets to marriage of 25 years staying together. Even if there were they would all be individual secrets, this isn’t a one size fits most deal! And noooo, we aren’t from the generation where, “If it’s broke, we don’t junk it we fix it!”
Actually, Eric and I are from the generation of, if it fits for awhile wear it, but things do wear out so throw them away and get new, generation. So nope that’s not the reason we ‘made’ it 25 years.
Ohhh I love this one, ” Mom and dad you guys are amazing. Except, it’s difficult for us kids to live up to that because we want it ‘just like you two!”
Shut the F_ck bleep, bleep, bleep up!!!!
We worked our butts off to ensure you guys had what you needed and wanted to live a happy fulfilling life. Some days it was good we were so broke because it financially made sense to stay together.
Yes, we love all four of you and yes we have enjoyed each of you as well as each other. But kiddos, being best friends is easy because we typically choose people who love what we love to do as are best friends, but as a mommy/ daddy and husband/wife, well that’s more of a role not a choice. Therefore, our only advice to you is live each day one step at a time, if in doubt don’t go out (it says on the beaches in hawaii), but in life I disagree.
Sometime you have to go out when in doubt, nooo not into the ocean, that’s stupidity, but in life. Ensure your doubt is not fear, follow your gut if it feels right then follow that. If a little doubt creeps in or the what ifs creep up, pause to ensure its not an emotion from the past seeping into the present.
Okay back to 25 years that became to deep, but hey we owe our past 25 years to them. Not because we stuck together ‘for the kids’ but rather we stuck together because we remembered how much fun and sex we had BK! (Hahahhaha, Before Kids).
I don’t know where I was going with that!
As most of you know I wrote a ‘Sex Ed’ book and have been working on a relationships book, but I just can’t wrap it up. You see I find things so comical now, that writing any guruish deep, serious, tear jerking, sappy message doesn’t work for me anymore. I don’t feel shameful, I don’t feel judgemental yet I don’t feel judged any longer.
How did we make it 25 years? Hmmm having alot of fun. Can it be that simple? Yes, it is. We have always tried to have fun together. We don’t have the same opinions, thoughts, or even all the exact same interest. But we always have fun.
I interrupt that last thought, to announce…Eric just peeked around the corner and said, “What are you doing up so early? You have been out of bed for like two hours?”
I crouched down as I begin to giggle, I say, “I just wanted to get a little post in on our 25th.”
He laughs, starts the coffee and moves about, to get dressed. We have a funny conversation about poop. We remembered one of the grandkids told Mamaw, the elderly think about sex, poop, eating and napping. I am beginning to see the similarities.
It looks like our day of deciding what we are going to eat, where we are going to burn in the sun, or meet up with a good friend named Larry or his brother Gary. So for now, here is to twenty five years of marriage to the same man.
The same man who Let me choose some creepy day to everyone else Friday the 13th. The same man who never followed a rule book it was right for one and right for all. He is a long list of things and they are all pretty wonderful. He is a good man and I plan on keeping him around for as long as he wants to stick around. I can promise him my heart always and forever. Not because the past 25 years have been perfect however, because I have had alot of laughs. You make me laugh on a cold rainy night or when the sun is shining bright! Keep the funny coming babe! I love you, Eric Drake.
PS. As I wrap up, trying to edit this post, Eric pours me a cup of coffee, stares at me (as I try to reread), and then he begins to talk…I acted like I was listening then I heard the word work and I could feel myself feeling guilty. I began to listen and he wanted to do something for his project and he knew it was our anniversary and felt guilty. I literally paused took a deep breath in and said, “I love you and happy anniversary. You should definetly check into work.”
We have never been off work this long, ever. On just vacation. So there ya go fans of the 25 year anniversary club, you don’t need a celebration with a big hoopla on the big 2 -5, if you are having fun almost everyday the BIG ‘ONE ANNIVERSARY’ is whatever you want it to be! Because daily happiness and doing what you love, being where you want to be and with your best friend to share in this journey, well its true…it’s paradise!
As a plan comes together, remember to allow all the emotions. My business plan is unfolding, as if a veil has been lifted and each step I take flowers grow, as I lift my foot. It is a fantastic feeling of love, amazement, charasmatic and sweet freedom!
If all of this is super amazing and is in perfect timing, then why do I become so overwhelmed? I have asked this question over and over. I have asked, have allowed and I am receiving.
My answer is always in a question form, isn’t this fun, exuberant, thrilling, ecstatic and so on? And yes everytime, I step back and ask the question, and receive that answer, I first think NOOOOOO it is not! My chest hurts, I feel swollen, attempting to sleep is a mute point. However, when I stop and breathe/meditate whatever you want to call it, the answer is clear, as the beautiful clear river, on a cool crisp Autumn day. Yes this journey or plan is fun, adventurous, exuberant, breath taking and much more.
I have now decided the overwhelming emotions might be the same, but just a different perspective. Therefore, when a plan comes together or your business/dreams form, as a puzzle mysterically putting itself together, watch in awe. Let it flow and if it doesn’t flow, while you are doing something, don’t resist just flow around it!
Think of a rushing wall of water. The more power it has behind its rush, the less resistance it has. Does the water have any resistance? Yes, but if it has cohesively bound its water molecules together, it feels very little of the resistance. The same goes for us.
We do not have to continuously know how a plan is coming together or how we are to accomplish, what we desire to accomplish. But we do need to know what our desires are. Then our next step is to enjoy all the fun twist and turns as we feel good along the journey.
For example: I had wrote about providing soap, bath bombs ect. On our Livelove store for you to purchase and enjoy. Then my friend/partner Debbie mentioned this new soap factory in Bedford Ky. and offered to have me write about them!
The Twilight Zone theme played in my head and I stood in amazement of these two families and their business adventure. Not only that, I was pretty sure I had found my soap!
My entire week has been like this. Blessings upon blessings. Fun adventures, a great deal of love and laughter.
Have I had any resistance this week? I wish I could say no, buttttttt in reality that’s not possible, However, it was all short lived. I practiced my new found tools to jump back on track, everytime! Sometimes, I told my son in a frantic frustrated voice, “I am frustrated, basically I am pissed off and I am trying to figure out why, it’s not you it’s just little irritating things.”
We would get a good laugh out of that, when my five minutes were over.
Just remember to enjoy the journey! Set the goals and forget it! If you want to be sitting on a balcony, looking over the ocean in five or less years, set the goal and begin to tell people about it. Describe it in as much full form as you want. Enjoy the vision. Until a How question creeps in, then stop the conversation and come back to it later. If the how question, comes up from, someone else, attempt to refrain from having that same conversation, with that person. (I promise you will do yourself a favor.)
The journey will begin as soon as you know where you are going. You see you wouldn’t go on vacation and not have a final destination in mind. Even if you just took off driving, you have a set final destination. However, if you never put the car in drive you will continue to stay in park.
I know I have ended a great deal of blogs with this next paragraph, but someone needs to read it.
If you are struggling right now, with anything in your life…look up, hold on, this too will pass!