Category Archives: Relationships

One two buckle my shoe…

Three four shut the door, five six pick up sticks…you know the rest of the nursery rhyme. I know it sounds silly, but all my mind has let me do, for several days, is repeat nursery rhymes over and over. Jack be Nimble, Mary had a Little Lamb and so on. Why?

One reason, is my baby boy is off to college and I continually reflect back to the simple times of nursery rhymes. Each time I feel a little sad I think of another one, say it, then become a little relieved with a smile and a giggle. The cycle repeats itself each time we dig through an old box or give away some old action figures.

I am excited about the next adventures in our lives. I am estatic while watching Nicholas grow into a beautiful young man, who is following his heart. He has a plan and is sticking to it.

When I become teary eyed he wraps his big arms around me and says, Mom, I love you and it’s gonna be okay!”

I KNOW, I KNOW! I wouldn’t want to have children who weren’t thriving and following their bliss! I know I can’t fix up the house enough to entice them to stay with me and nor would I want that. However, at this moment at 6 AM, I feel like gathering them all up and saying,”Okay, change of plans! Today, we are all going to curl up on the couch and read Dr. Suess. Or hey let’s go to McDonald’s play land!”

Back to the nursery rhymes…Little Miss Muffett, Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall…yes, I know it’s a bit creepy. All I can say it is my brains way of coping with the ‘adulting.’ When I become fearful of the changes, I search for something from their childhood that is simple.

Aren’t these emotions normal? As I read my sister-n-law’s blog “When the kids grow up” or @Jennifer Reynolds Drake on Facebook, I feel comforted and realize, I am not alone. Her last paragraph (which I will share her post after I complete this writing) sums it up best: “And now we can settle in the fact that we’ve raised our kids to the best of our ability, we’ve entrusted them into His hands, and that the biggest growth comes from change.”

I realize change is inevitable. I am evolving to a level I have only dreamed of, in the past. Why now? Because for the past twenty six years I have been in my bliss being a mommy. And YES, Jenny, you are correct they still need me and will continue to call, I know that, but it is a little scary.

As for today, I am continuing to reflect on the funny memories and looking ahead to the next chapter. Most importantly I am enjoying each moment in the present! All we have is Right now! Take time to find your moment or nursery rhyme to bring you to a moment of sweetness and enjoy where you are right now.

One-two buckle my shoe, three-four shut the door, five- six pick up sticks, seven- eight lay them straight, Nine-ten let’s do it again, PLEASE!

God Bless!

Livelove

I must apologize to my family, friends and the transgender who I met in the doctor’s office…

Yesterday, was a great day!! You ask why I want to apologize? Oh keep reading! After you have finished laughing until you cry, then hopefully you will accept my apology.

The scene:  the sun is bright, heat index high, it is 9 A.M., and I am in my car with the sunroof open. Yes, it is one hot day in Kansas City, Ladies and Gentleman, but I am loving it. I didn’t realize my appointment was at 9:15 therefore, my hair is in a messy bun and I look like a kindergarten teacher with my free flowing Hawaiian dress on. Although I am a bit rushed, I feel terrific. 

Then the song that just says everything I am feeling, at the moment, comes on the radio. My mind is freely thinking and planning for my upcoming ‘Be Happy’ seminars. I am contemplating the first song to have playing, extremely loud, when the audience enters this most amazing conference. Think Teena Think!!! What song would be fun, uplifting, sets the fun filled event to help people relax and let go? Oh my goodness…the beat just started thumping and I began dancing, yes in my car. Oh I almost forgot, the song was “Who let the dogs out.” 

When the song came on,  I turned it up and began singing, dancing in my seat and waving my arms like I was the rapper/ singer myself. “Who Let the Dogs Out? Who? Who? Who?  Who Let the Dogs Out? Who? Who? Who?”

I sounded great, as far as I was concerned. I was engrossed in the song, feeling the beat, singing what words I knew, laughing dancing just having fun with me, myself, and I.

Why would I apologize? As much fun as I was having and was lost in ‘me,’  I shook my head up and down, then side to side, I was sitting at a red light, next to the gigantic Sprint Company Sign; when I glanced to my left there was a a driver starring at me. I didn’t think too much about it, but of course I had to look again. (Still rocking out like a crazy women) I glanced back to my left only to see someone videoing me, in my crazy, dancing, having hysterical fun state. I stopped for a split second, smiled real big and yelled have a great day. What??? Why do I care? 

To be honest I didn’t until this morning! I realized, if someone posted that video my family and friends might be a bit upset with me. Therefore, I am taking the time to write and apologize. I realize my life has changed. Yes, I have always been happy, but my happy now is living life to the fullest. If the music moves me well so be it. If dancing like a crazy lady is what I feel at that moment, yep I am going to dance. Therefore, if the video is posted and you happen to see it, just mark it up for that’s my mommy, daughter, wife, friend, Mrs. Drake or Teena; you either love her or you don’t. 

As for the beautiful transgender in the waiting room. I am sorry for not complimenting how beautiful you looked in pink. We had a great conversation about Ebay and I enjoyed our moment of conversation. However, I hesitated to say anything about your outfit why? Honestly, I didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable and I feared some of the people might have made you feel that away. Therefore, if you ever read this, you looked beautiful and you had my favorite color on. My message to you is live on, be free and love yourself! I apologize for not saying anything. 

Feel good today! Take time to dance in the car, sing to the top of your lungs, dance in the rain and love one another. If someone is watching or videoing you let them, they may need the pick me up. 

God Bless!

Livelove4ever!!! 

 

What do Snow White and Cinderella have in common? 

As we study a new way to habitually live, it only seems appropriate to analyze some childhood memories. You see in today’s world our queens and princesses are more dominant or independent. However, the original princesses such as Snow White and Cinderella were considered damsels in distress, helpless and in need of a hero. I can remember when I would point out many negatives about the two characters and think how sexist the shows truly were. However, it never failed, if the girls were watching either of these shows, I would become mesmerized and stop whatever I was doing to complete the movie. (I even played the role of Snow White in a school play at one time.)

Today, I am asking you to take a different perspective on our damsel’s in distress! What if we simply accepted their stories based on the time frame they were written and first watched. Would we see their lives in a different light? Let’s see if these two princesses (later to become queen) can impact our lives and strategically place us on a path of least resistance.

Snow White…abandoned by her stepmother (the queen), sent out to be killed, life was spared because? She was super nice and beautiful. You see that Huntsman couldn’t do it! Even if he was going against orders of the Queen. Snow White emitted kindness, caring, understanding and positive vibrations. Now let us think…hmmm how would you or I feel if we were taken into the woods, only to realize it was our last walk from home, the beautiful castle and home are, no more. Although the man who was supposed to take our life, didn’t go thru with the deed, he did leave you or me in the dark and say run for your life! Never return or the queen will kill you! After writing all of that I realize how brave she really was! I would have probably fallen apart.

Cinderella…abused by her step-mother and sisters, expected to clean, cook and take care of her cruddy step family. Only to be locked away in her room when the prince came looking for her. Yet, she continued to stay positive! She would clean, feed the animals, sing and from the stories point of view, she was a blissful human being. Again put yourself in her shoes. How would you feel? Would you refuse to meet all the demands of these horrific people? Or would you leave never to return? I must admit I would have probably been killed on the spot for my smart mouth! However, Cinderella continued to find a good feeling and stayed in that vibration. She would sing, dance, whistle or speak to the animals.

In comparison, both stories have a great deal in common. However, the one common attribute for each princess is their positive attitude. They both saw a better life. Snow White ended up finding seven dwarfs who loved ‘whistling while they worked.’ They didn’t mind their jobs and were ecstatic as well as appreciative of Snow White’s talents. Cinderella found her way to the ball. (Which was an amazing opportunity for anyone in the land). Her prince didn’t only recognize her beauty, but he saw the positive, kind, fun loving Cinderella, for who she really is.

Do you think those are all coincidences? Do you think it was by chance they received what they wanted out of life? Why didn’t they continue in the same old rut and continue to be abused? After a great deal of analyzing these two stories, it is pretty simple to observe how these ladies found their path to least resistance. They had a vision and what their life was, at the time, was not their vision. However, neither princess ever gave up!!!!

I do realize we live in a world full of despair and depression. Is it the president’s fault? Is it your spouse’s? Oh, I understand it is your children’s fault? I also realize these are fairy tale characters we are discussing…does it really matter? No! It is a great comparison!

Begin today, to tell your fairytale. Even if you are a damsel in distress, flat broke, feeling like crap and wishing you could just receive a simple break, in life. The GREAT NEWS is YOU CAN!!!!!!!! What is your story? Yes, everyone has a negative story, but if you listen closely, they only receive a great outcome if they are looking for it. Tell the story you want. It is okay if it is sometimes a struggle, do it anyway. In my home, we entitle this, “Fake it till you make it!”

Isn’t it time to feel GREAT! Feel it, visualize it and receive. Ask for what you want and believe you deserve it. Then receive it!!! Just like these two princesses, yes they had to go thru some crap to receive the life they both desired. However, they continued to feel good and eventually both received a life of joy, wealth, happiness, partnership and much more. You can do this too! How? Change your story it is as simple as that!

Livelove,

Your Pinkologist! (That makes me laugh every time I write it because? It just does!)

 

Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff…

Several years ago a small ‘pocket book’ was published illuminating this topic ‘Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff!’ The author gave scenarios and demonstrated how silly it is to worry and fret over the silly annoyances in life. I have each one of these books, to remind me to take life with a grain of salt. To seek the adventure life has to offer! Take the challenge allow your inner being to sing thru you.

Once you have decided and began this journey of being in the moment and making decisions based on your inner feelings; you will always want to feel this way.

However, in life we all have moments of sadness, irritation, aggravation anger that we must deal with from time to time. Recently I have found that freezing it in my mind, walking away and them come back to discuss or determine a solution is best for me. You see, in the past I would resist, argue, return ugly insults, ect. Now, I choose to not even utilize the negative vocabulary. Oh yes it creeps in at times. However, for the most part I choose a better reaction or to not react at all. It depends on the situation. 
For example: I had a conversation with a friend and she was in a bad moode. Everything was wrong in her life. Her kid was a brat, didn’t have enough money, felt trapped. Listening to her talk was almost unbearable. I just kept thinking, stay calm, listen there is a reason for this conversation. After a little while and multiple attempts to change the conversation I feared I would say something to offend her. (Remember I lost my filter at the first break in my leg lol). Anyways, she was finally called away. I love this person and she needed to vent! I allowed her to do that for a small portion of time. The only problem is I was carrying this yuk, negative, irritated weight of emotion for her. I cried for her, the pain was real. 

What do I do? Hmmmm I decided to plug in my phone and leave it home. I went to the pool and immediatly put my entire body under water. As I came up after a few seconds, I realized I had taken my own advice. I froze the situation and went to my fun happy place, water!!! (Yes, water of any kind takes me to a calm loving state). As I began my physical therapy I would search my paradigm for a good feeling thought. A vision of the future or a memory from the past. It was similar to the characters of Inside Out, running around plugging in emotions. Finally, I found a few to distract my negative emotion. 

Later, that night I called my friend and said, “I love you and I want everything to be okay for you. If I can help in any way let me know.” 

At that moment I realized I should take my own advice!!! She was laughing and continued to tell me about her little boy and how cute he was being. Her husband had cooked supper and bought flowers. She basically was a changed woman from four hours earlier. I hung up the phone, looked at my husband and said, “Yes, I have more writting material.” 

Therefore, when I refer to Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff, I mean don’t sweat other people’s small stuff either. My mom would tell me in the past…you call me and compla in or discuss your relationships  then you are off in an hour back to honeymoon phase. Isn’t that true? We all have that loved one who listens no matter what. Who loves us unconditionally who listens and cares so deeply that they will take on those emotions for us. My mommy does that for me. I try now to call or go see her after the fact and explain it’s all good. I don’t always remember, but most of the time I make the effort. 

Take time to enjoy. Remember the small stuff is not worth it. I would not have changed listening to my friend, she was having a legitimate melt down for a moment. However, next time I will send her the energy I did this time, I will see her feeling better, but I will not allow myself to sweat it or hang on to it!! 

I promise parents!!!! Most of the crazy, mixed up, emotions that follow parenting just means you need to keep following and reading my blogg. Because you can feel blissful even in the midst of chaos. Once you have incorporated a few simple techniques, you will be able to look back and say shew, we made it!!! And had fun while we were doing it!!!

No matter what ‘Be Happy’!!!!!!! If it makes you happy do more of it. Find time to laugh, enjoy. Yes, sometimes you will be presented with a not so good feeling situation. But do not sweat it!!! 

God Bless

Livelove!!!!!!

Fear? Worry? Anger and Resentment? 

I love you! Those three words can carry an emotional attachment that creates fear and worry depending on how you feel. Yes, I am continuing to discuss ways to feel your way to happiness.

What about finding the love of my life? I want to have love! I want to love and be loved! How can I have that? This may appear to be too simple. However, the few steps I am about to explain are simple and follow the same guidelines as the Universal Law Like Begets Like. 

Step one: stop wallowing with the pigs!!! Meaning we all know he or she hurt you and they are crazy and you are damaged and and and and!!! How many times have you told the story? Each time you tell the story it continues to create and recreate the negative emotion and feeling. All people have a toxic person float in and hopefully out of their lives. The difference is when you are living in the now and making decisions based on the emotional attachment of the outcome; you will choose the easiest, funnest, most peaceful route naturally. But, your so focused on what has been you continue to stay at that low frequency. Which is why I say stop wallowing with the pigs.

Step two: Take time to fall in love with you! I know most have heard you can only love someone as much as you love yourself. My daughter,Nancy, said, “It depends on how broken you are when entering the relationship. You must mend first before you can be in a healthy relationship!” 

Find what you love about you and focus on those items! The things you don’t like about yourself will begin to improve because you continue to focus on your strengths.

Step Three: Create the relationship you want in your mind. How does your partner treat you? See it, feel it visualize and believe it. I promise they will come into your life. If you will feel it. Also accept that you are worthy of love. You are loveable!!!! You deserve a kind, caring, loving partner because that is the KIND of partner you are.

Step Four: if you do not feel love for yourself re-evaluate take time to learn what you love about yourself and focus on that. Tell your concious mind to hush if it begins to throw negative what If’s at you. (Remember that is the job of the concious mind, it is to protect you by retrieving information from your paradigm. Therefore, understand you must continually tell it nooo this time is different because I am different. I am not that past lack of confidence sad disturbed hated life person anymore!! But I thank you for always trying to protect me) then proceed forward with your love for you and in a brief amount of time your partner will appear. They will compliment you and it will be exactly how you visualized it! 

Create your own reality!! Speak about the exciting events unfolding in your life. Choose to live and feel your way to happiness! 

God Bless You!! 

Livelove 

You, he she– they all irritate me!!!

Do you find yourself disliking everyone? Is there something wrong with everyone? Do you continually look around and see how bad you are treated by others. Gosh, I know how you feel! It seems like everytime I turn around some one is doing something to me. The only difference in my life now is the people I am constantly attracted to love me for me. I see the beauty in me therefore, I see the beauty in others as well.

Don’t worry if you are agreeing with the first portion of the above paragraph, it’s okay I have felt the same way! There are days I still struggle with what I call, awkward moments. Where someone might rub me the wrong way or I find fault in others. However, to return to those conversations or feelings on a daily basis would be devastating. I can remember feeling competitive, compared, hurt, not good enough, irritable with others and continually finding fault. Again, Yuk even typing those words create a sick feeling in my stomach. 

Then how do I change it? It’s not difficult, but it does take effort on your part. The first few weeks of practicing this new way of thinking you may feel a colorful array of emotions. For example: when you recognize why someone is not being nice to you it may create an angry or sad emotion at first. However, keep working at it and you will be surprised at how amazing each individual, who is already in your life or comes into your life, truly is. I am in awe of my loved ones! I always use the words ‘loved ones’ because I love each individual in my life! I can not discriminate between family and friends I feel fortunate to have them all!!!

Have you ever heard of Universal Laws? Of course if you have read my past writings you have heard me speak of them. The most common laws we learn about in elementary school are Newton’s Laws. Universal Laws follow the same guidlines. The one I am speaking of today is Like Begets Like. You can easily put this into other wording yet it’s definition is the same. This one says whatever you like about other people is what you like about yourself. This law (like all laws) is nonbiased or not prejudice. In other words it doesn’t care if you like or hate-the law goes both ways. Therefore, everything you don’t like about another person you don’t like about yourself. My mother always told me if you are pointing one finger at your neighbor three are pointing back. If you are not sure about this law due to religious beliefs,; the World English Bible translates the passage as: You hypocrite! First remove the beam out of your own eye, and then you can see clearly to remove the speck out of your brother’s eye.Mathew 7-5

Universal Laws are laws. They are universal. They do not discriminate against religion, ethnicity, shape, size, political party or anything else that separates us from each other. They are the same for everyone. 

How does this work? Let’s begin with a simple example. The song, I Like Big Butts and I cannot lie, is the first scenario that comes to mind. In the beginning of the song several women are talking about another girls butt! If I remember correctly they are bashing her for having such a nice, big butt. Then the song proceeds to defend and praise a big butt! Glorifying the one part the women were complaining about. I know this is a funny comparison or way to explain the law Like Begets Like, but it is fun to do and keeps it light hearted. If you were in the circle of ferocious haters of big butts, you need to step back and ask yourself why? Why does a big oh juicy booty bother you enough to complain about it? Or talk about it? In reality those women in the song didn’t like their behinds (big or small) or they lacked in that area and were just hating on the beautiful big butt. 

Okay, maybe I took that description of butts a little too far! But I guarantee I created a thought for you to begin recognizing the effects of Like Begets Like in your life. You probably know of someone that irritates you, now you can begin to identify why and how to change it.

I know I haven’t told you how to correct these awkward moments in your life. The reason is just like quitting smoking you have to want to quit. Same with changing your habitual view of yourself and the world around you only YOU CAN CHANGE IT! How? How? How?

Steps: 

  1. Learn the Universal Law
  2. Accept it! It’s true I promise as you see others is how you see yourself.
  3. If you catch yourself joining a conversation about someone else and it is not creating a great emotion, walk away or say, “I know but she has worked her love handles off to get that butt!” Anything to change the direction of the comments and converaation.
  4. If you are faced with a negative situation where you feel like the victim- take time to be alone, only to analyze why you felt sad and how you could have handled that differently.
  5. Change what you say to yourself and or about yourself. For example: I always gain weight when _________ . (Fill in the blank). Instead begin saying I love my body and I am happy to be healthy and wealthy. (I use the term Wealthy because some how America decided weight is a sign of poverty. Although carrying weight was a sign of wealth in the past!) I don’t care what you say to yourself just remember the law continues to be active no matter who you are talking about.
  6. Be cautious before you react. For many years I reacted to everything! Now I stop, think and may respond or may not. In other words it’s not about your opinion, rather your vibration. My two cents isn’t always necessary and neither is yours. Therefore, stay cautious before you react. (My grandma always said, “If you can’t say anything nice do not say it at all)
  7. Last trust yourself. Remember all good energy is flowing towards you. The more ‘likes’ you put out and the less “criticism’ the more great vibrations will migrate towards you. When you catch yourself being even silently judgemental, stop yourself, look within, and observe an area of your life you would like to improve. Then find something good to think or say about that person, redirecting the thought process.
  8. Like begets like: if you see good you will feel good more and more. (What you see in others is how you feel about yourself good or bad)

    Have fun!!! 

    Livelove 

    Always remember God loves you no matter what!!!!

    Let’s Clear One Thing UP……..

    First, if you recently followed my blog or if you have always followed I want to say THANK YOU! If you are reading for the first time, this blog is a little catch up on who I am, where I am going and how grateful I am for where I have been.

    Recently, I began a journey and decided to share it with you by blogging, here on my blog. My journey has been magnificent with ups, downs and all arounds, thus far. I wake up each morning excited about what the universe has to offer today. I smile, run to the mirror say, GOOD MORNING BEAUTIFUL WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY IT IS TO ENJOY THIS JOURNEY. I AM READY AND EXCITED ABOUT MY JOURNEY TODAY!!!!!!!!

    Okay, to be honest, I don’t jump up and scream that every morning (but after reading it, I might try it because it feels really good) nor do I wake up in a perfect mood everyday. However, I do wake up every morning anticipating what is going to be Terrific in my day. I also will admit I have a few rituals of ‘Pump Me Up’ that I perform. Sometimes it is lay there until I catch the beautiful vision I want or I will talk to myself in the mirror for a brief moment. The most important part, you understand, is my journey is to live in a vibration of feeling happy the majority of the time. The most exciting part of this journey is I am sharing it with you!

    Here is what we needed to clear up! I did have a life changing experience that reminded me of who I am. I have felt some (in my opinion very little) despair over this experience. The truth is me shattering my leg, laying in a ditch, and seven months later still trying to heal changed my life, by reminding me of my life purpose. You see I have had very few catastrophes in my life. I have suffered the loss of loved ones, but always felt the love I had for them will always keep them alive. I am sure my mother and father would tell you otherwise, but according to me my life was perfect from day one! I mean my mother didn’t name me for a couple of days and when she did come up with a name it was- Teena (unique spelling) and Gay for the middle!! What? Yes, I am telling you the only thing my accident did for me, which I am super grateful for, was to remind me of my life purpose. I was born to spread, be and teach others to be happy. To find their bliss.

    That may sound crazy, but it’s true. I can’t tell you, of anytime in my life, that I havent found something good or positive out of a situation. Not one. Therefore, if I write about despair, depression, loss please note I am in no way shape or form comparing my measly little issues with some of your horrific situations. Lately, I have read some blogs that I feel so sorry for some people. That is why I felt like you needed to know I understand everyone has issues in their life. The best I can do is offer you new tools to assist you in enjoying your time here on earth; because they are my gifts I am sharing with you.

    I am grateful for my life. I have lived a life most could only dream of. I had a strong circle of love from my family from parents to aunts/uncles, grandparents, step-parents, friends the list and circle becomes larger all the time. I married my best friend, have four beautiful children, and much more. Who am I? I don’t know, but I do know what I love and what creates a feeling of overwhelming happiness. I also know my ‘job’ ‘mission’ ‘life purpose’ ‘whatever’ you want to call it…it is to ‘be happy’ and teach you how to ‘be happy.’ Remember, what makes me happy doesn’t necessarily make you happy, but you will know when you FEEL IT!

    God Bless You! God Loves You No Matter What!