I can’t believe it! Twenty five years ago Eric Drake, mommy and I, at four in the morning were driving to Kings Daughters Hospital in Madison Indiana. It was a cool, crisp, October morning and I can remember thinking and praying, “Lord, help me thru this and Please Please let me be a good mommy! It was 1992, I was six days shy of my twenty first birthday, Eric was 22 and working his butt off to make ends meet. I remember thinking this pregnancy can’t be over! (I loved being pregnant). It was similar to a journey down a path with another spirit, yet you can’t see them. She was always with me. Responded to my every move, she helped choose what we ate each day, she continued to push me to take care of myself. When she began to force her way out, it almost felt like she was ripping my insides out with her, but she was ready to see this earthly life. She was ready to create her own experiences, live, love and enjoy her life. The afternoon before our trip, to the hospital was beautiful, although I was really aggitated. Mommy called and I demanded she come meet me at the house. I whined so much Eric took me for a ride, on the back roads. Tim Perkinson, Ricky White and Jarod Stark were at the house, when we returned. Oh mommy as well. One look at me and she knew! Mom watched me cook supper, work around the house (which didn’t need to be cleaned), and breathe heavy, occasionally. It didn’t take long for her to look at Eric and say, “We are having a baby tonight, you need to rest up!” Eric turned white as a ghost and almost immediatly went to bed. Poop (Tim’s nickname) stayed with mom and I, to watch the rest of Fried Green Tomatoes. Oh and we can’t forget, we ate marshmallow cream and peanut butter. I was now having contractions 10 to 15 minutes apart. (We all acted like it was no big deal) The next part was hilarious! I don’t know why, but I decided I would drive Tim home. Why, either of them let me drive I will never know. Probably, I was super stubborn and demanded to drive. (Hmmm that sounds about right). It wasn’t that far! I remember the sky was almost black, with a few cirrus clouds, glowing with the reflection of the gigantic full moon! As we slowly creeped up the hill, where the headlights beamed, straight ahead, I had one of the worst contractions, I had ever experienced. About that time I slammed the gas pedal down, forcing my car to almost ramp the hill, heading down to his house. Mom and Poop screamed, then immediately stopped themselves only to hold their breath, in hopes of survival of the small, but tedious road trip. I almost came to a stop, when yep, it hit again and a repeat event happened! When Poop jumped out of the car he was terrified, his face was almost transparent, and all he could say was, “Goodluck, I will see you tomorrow.” The next four hours were touch and go! Until I began hitting the wall and rocking back and forth. Mom went to get Eric and we were off to the hospital! The next morning we had a beautiful baby girl! She was our surprise gift! Our family and friends came to support us. And our lives changed forever! It was an amazing day. You know, as I reflect and visualize for the future, I always want to share with you. LIFE is… What you make it! Eric Drake and I has no idea what we were doing October 2nd 1992! We had very little money, little life experience and yet all we knew is we loved this little human/spirit/baby girl more than words could express. She had colic for her first six weeks of life. I can remember we would trade off sleeping one hour at a time. We had our electric shut off once and our water a couple of times! However, Listen up!!! We made it! Twenty-five years later all those struggles are now funny memories! If you are struggling, right now…Please remember take everything in twos. I know most people will tell you, “One step at a time!” I do agree, but for me it has always been twos. If you can take one step why not two! If you can make it thru two seconds, two minutes, two hours, two days, two weeks!!! You can make it! I know you have sad times and struggles, but you got this!!! I have looked back over my twenty five years with this beautiful young lady and all four of our children and realized the difficult times become diluted and almost more cherished, because they always illuminate a growth period of awesomeness! A time where we all came together, depended on each other and were grateful for the good times!
I bought Eric a bike!! For years I have begged my honey to ride bikes with me. Then we were unsure how well I would be able to ride. Therefore, when I rode, the other day, he agreed! I can’t describe the exact emotions I had, when we were shopping. They were something like, a little girl who was buying her best friend a bike so they could play together. I was extremely suttle, I acted like it was no big deal that we were in Scheels, searching for the bike section. You see, he didn’t tell me what we were doing, he just told me to come on we were shopping. (I even whined a little bit because I wanted to stay home).
Anywhooooo…he tries to throw me off. We looked at guns, skateboards 😠, kayaks, and everything else in the store. I finally found a sales rep and said, “Ask him what you are looking for.” (Remember this is a gigantic store, it is beautiful outside and this man has walked my butt all over the store like we were bored or something lol).
Eric asked the man where the bikes were. At that moment, my heart fluttered, I almost teared up and then I giggled and held his hand tight and said, “Sooooo we are looking at bikes?”
“Yes, I think you need a bike with gears. I know that bike you are riding has to be hurting your leg going up all those hills.”
My heart sank for a moment. I looked down as we meandered through to go back downstairs because this store is so gigantic and we just spent an hour, attempting to not look at bikes, but really, we didn’t know where they were. Therefore, now we are walking downstairs, to find the back section, in a corner that seemed like in the north pole! As we approached the bike section I knew in my heart it wasn’t for me. Thank goodness because as you all (who follow my crazy stories) know I love my pink bike and Freddy the Pink Flamingo, does as well.
Eric looks at the price tag and reads it outloud without thinking, who he was with,”On-sale for four hundred ninety nine. Hmmm it was originally six ninety-nine.”
I quickly appeared by his side, peered over his shoulder, and in an astonished, shocked and disapproving voice I said,”WHAT? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?”
In my head:
Hold up! If I am correct about three years ago, I called you almost yelling in the phone, how I had found a pink cupcake bike at Sports Academy, for fifty dollars and I was buying it! I said I would buy you a bike, but I have only budgeted for maybe one hundred and fifty.
Then it happened the swaggy, all dressed up, neat and groomed, sales rep showed up. “Hey, can I help you with something? Do you have any questions?”
In my head again, I am like nope no questions here! We are good. Obviously, we are not avid bikers so, no dude back off and keep your gazillion dollar bike to yourself! Butt… (yes, I intentionally mispelled that) nooooo, Eric says yes…???????
He began asking questions, comparing several different ‘professional’ bikes and asking about what the new electric fangled dangle things were.
The sales person did an excellent job. I will say, by the time we left (without a 500 dollar bike) I was convinced the Electra was the bike to have. It was the cat daddy of bicycles. (Who knew Schwinn wasn’t the best, now). The guy actually reminded me of when I was on a roll in selling @townecraft cookware, it seemed like I couldn’t say the wrong words to the people. They knew how excellent the product was, they could feel how passionate I was about it and therefore they bought it. He was on target! (Also we will probably own one or two someday because we both left asking ourselves if it made that big of a difference). For now we are headed to Walmart.
Skip over this part, if you only want to know about Eric’s bike!
Now let me begin with, “Walmart! I realize you don’t really have to have good customer service nor do you have to treat your employees special, but oh how I wish you did!”
Side note everyone this is my, Teena Drake’s brain so this is a side note. If the Walmart corporation wants to hire me to teach YOU- Owners and head CEO and whoever else that is in charge- How to create a beautiful environment that will encourage people to want to shop at your store my email is Livelove.email@example.com.
I mean I know of very few people who want or desire to shop there anymore. However, we do because…Idk I kind of feel like yes I am getting items cheaper, especially if I am unconcerned about the quality or customer service, but I love the employees and feel like as long as I shop there many people have employment. HOWEVER, it would be awesome to restructure what could be a beautiful thing. (Okay back to the story).
We look at several bikes. Some were way up and others trapped in a new system, to I guess ensure no one slides a bicycle under their shirt. We compared having fenders, or not, gears were a must for him. After a great deal of belly, cheek, and head hurting laughter (you know the kind that the hurt feels so good) we had decided on one beautiful, basic, black bicycle. As we were rolling out with it, Eric said, “Wow! Look at that!”
I looked up and in the far corner, tucked away, on the top rack was a beautiful turquoise bike, with brown pleather seat, brown grips on the handle bars, with a bold stitching, Indian prints-pencil thin design stenciled on the side, thin tired, with gears, a bicycle, made for Eric Drake!
We pulled the rack out, somehow figured out how to pull it down (yes we asked for help, but no show), figured out the arm holding it down and there it was! It was beautiful and perfect for my honey bunny! He was the most adorable person, I know that’s not masculine sounding, but remember at this point, my state of mind is, we are two little kids picking out my best friends bicycle so we can go out to play.
We bought it, went home and prepared for an evening ride!
From this point forward I can actual say, “They rode off into the sunset, with gigantic smiles on their faces, a bubbly feeling of child like excitement, and lived HAPPILY EVER AFTER!
Please if you learn nothing else from my writings learn this!
You do deserve the very best!
You are amazing!
You are a GIFT from God that loves you no matter what!
Last point (for now)- Life is too short! Have fun while you are here. If riding a bicycle creates happiness for you, do it and if you have a partner who is willing to play with you, do it! No matter what it is you enjoy…DO IT!
You are okay!
Yes! You are okay!
Look up, look up, LOOK UP!
My friend who is looking down…
Look up! Feel the warmth beaming in
The valley is for healing & nurturing
While here, look around & heal
Enjoy your nurturing friends
Bask in the sun like a sleepy cat
Heal, repair and rest
Be grateful for the valley & all it is
Now it is time to LOOK UP!
Your new journey is coming up
Now is your time to plan, heal gather
For the funfilled, scary (at times), road
The road – back up on the crest
Leave your worries in the valley
The nurterers will dispose of them
As you stand up to begin the journey
Inhale & exhale & smile
For it will be fun & as long as
You are following your bliss
Your next valley will not be so deep!
(Notice what punctuation sign is missing?)
Inspired writing at its best. I have had a hell of a week! And rather than boring you with the details I am want to tell you an inspired thought I just had! Maybe someone else needs this as well. Also I have an appointment in like 30 minutes and I don’t want to make Ms. Debbie keep waiting on me.
Inspired thougjt: With so many questions rolling through my head. Which way is best? Is it best for me or for them or for God or Jesus, or Buddha, or another religous organizations, the government, my kids….is it best for all races? Is it best for human kind or our nation? Please someone tell me? Answer the questions. Do I pray or not pray do I believe or not believe, encourage or discourage?
Don’t all of those questions overwhelm you? And have you benefitted from any of those questions? Nor have I and don’t I wish I could give you a solid answer. The truth is I can not give you any ‘answer’ at all!!!! I can only offer you an emotion a flow that is in sync with you and then hopefully if you want you can find your ‘path of least resiatance” (@abraham-hicks).
You see for over a year now (way before my accident) I began a quest, let’s say it was a spiritual yet deep quest! I have been asking people from all around the world three questions
1. If you were to be told you had six months to live from today what would you do?
2. After you die what happens? Describe and explain.
3. What is the meaning of Life and why?
Now I am not letting you in on the secrets to life, that I learned through this quest, just yet. Because if I didn’t get to ask some of you or other new friends because the time was not right, therefore my data is not clear.
However, hold on I must share one theory that has come out of this, but it is not my final answer!!! Okay?
What I meant to say just then was…there is no final answer! Nope not one. Your answers to these questions and mine, will be always changing and evolving. It may change from one minute to the next or you may create a habitual thought process you hold onto for life.
I can remember when I was ‘born again’ and so new and improved I became a bit better than others. I can remember blaming God for my woes and when I felt the lowest I could go I was on my knees until they were wearing holes in my jeans. Then came the next phase…the nothing syndrome. I believe in nothing, I think we are worth nothing, life is meaningless nothing! I must admit even the phases of studying ‘religious beliefs’ around the world this one I can’t deal with. Therefore, that’s the last of the nothingness. Because no matter what the emotional attachment to that entire concept makes me wonder why to life! Sooooo we have now had a peak into my inspired thought. My phone is dying and I am already late. (Poor Ms. Debbie, she is constantly wondering what am I going to do with Teena)
To be continued…
God loves you no matter what!!!!!
I had to find a reason to write about the eclipse because this topic has been so popular. At first I was a little bit against the ‘hype’ around the eclipse. I was like hmmm, why is this so prominent.
Of course I know why, Scientifically. However, this has been over the top. Hold on!!! Don’t get mad because of my last statement, I have changed my toon, DRASTICALLY. This eclipse has boosted the economy for many who would probably never see such a spike/increase again in their careers. It has also and continues to bring people together in a more positive perspective which is better than the most recent horrific reports about politics in general. I mean even the comedians forgot how to be funny because they have been so focused on the frustrations of politics. However, this eclipse has created a bridge of united we stand, come together, hold my hand and let us be one. Not the divided, sickening, negative emotions separating brothers and sisters, but a sense of belonging, caring, sharing and uniting in awe of a magnificent phenomena!
For that Solar Eclipse of 2017, I thank you, for a short time frame our nation will be in awe of togetherness and Historical Science in the making.
On Solar Eclipse Eve bring on the night!
The answer to my question is pretty obvious. Yes, a pile of resting cow manure, if stirred even the slightest, can smell up an entire area! Why does it matter? It really doesn’t however, it is good to know.
Life is similar to this. I realize sometimes, open discussion is the only way to heal. However, to stand and stir the pile to say you enjoy the aroma is ludicrous. When in a healing mode, get in patch the wound to allow it to heal on its own, then get out! Try not to stay in the smelly area and continue to stir and dig deeper, the outcome will not smell like roses, I promise.
When you are living in the midst of a pile of manure, you do not want to stay there do you? Also, haven’t we established that learning from the past is all you can do? You can not alter or change what has already been done, can you?
If you agreed with the above questions then put your stick down, right now! Change your conversations to exciting upcoming events, planning new adventures and creating a happier paradigm. Let the healing continue in the background.
To wrap it up! The more you stir poop the worse it smells. Let the decomposers do their job and you go ahead and create a better smelling future.
As I curl up to watch one of my all time favorite movies Bruce Almighty! It becomes clear it is a perfect analogy of you get what you ask for. Think about it there are only two rules 1. You can’t tell anyone you are God and trust me you don’t want that attention. 2. Can’t mess with Free Will And he responds with can I ask Why? God responds with, yes you can ask why, that’s the beauty of it!
The next few scenes are exact demonstrations of the law of attraction, everything he asked or anything anyone else asked for, they received. If they were not goal setting they could be aimlessly controlled. Jim Carrey in his character Bruce Almighty, shows us how simplistic life can be and joyous. But just like we can not truly control all the choices our children will make neither can God (was one of their messages). Therefore, our only choice is to set goals that make us happy and create the emotional attachment we desire. They even utilize funny, blaten symbolism to show how silly we are because we constantly have signs showing us the BEST path for us. Yet, we choose to say, “Oh no, I don’t need any help or I couldn’t deserve that good of a life or to be that happy.”
How many times can you remember making a choice you didn’t feel good about and it turned out to be a disaster? Or a decision that felt so right for you and even though some people questioned you, you knew like you knew. No matter what when you made that decision you knew it was right for you. Guess what? It turned out perfect or even better than you expected, didn’t it?
It’s because you made a decision on how you feel, it made you feel happy.
I have written it before and I will write it again and again and again….
Life is meant to live to feel good, be happy, enjoy, experience, fulfillment and much more. Set your goals and then enjoy the journey. The events along your road to success are fun and extraordinary.