Tag Archives: anxiety

Depressed? Don’t know why?

First, let me apologize for yesterday’s odd post about politics! I normally do not talk about that because, to be honest, it isn’t a ‘good feeling’ conversation. I realize sometimes those discussions must happen, but do not worry it won’t be a hot topic on this blog, unless it is advice, that all of us can use 😄.

Ever have those days that you wake up and BAM!! It hits you like a ton of bricks! That sick feeling of (inhale then exhale) depression! Life could be just terrific, but to you it would be much simpler to return to bed, curl up under the covers, close your eyes and forget anything ever existed.

Congratulations! You are human!!! Did you know the most famous of famous and rich of rich, have all felt this way, at one time or another.

As I watched, listened and rewound to hear again the stories of the past 75 years of the Golden Globes, last night, I realized something. Everyone on this Earth has those days. As the cinematography experts, plugged in the ‘wrap it up’ segment of the show, I watched as many exclaimed how hard they persevered to come to this point and they weren’t stopping until they were done!

You know what? That’s why they were there, receiving that award! Because they didn’t say, “How? Or I am not good enough.”

Instead they said, “What and I am good enough, I am BETTER than good enough!”

I will admit I cried through the entire show, reflecting on the monumental times. The times when groups of entertainers, utilized their talents to make the world a brighter place.

Funny thing is, I woke up feeling a little depressed today. As I meditated, prayed and began again, the naggy feeling wouldn’t go away. So I explored why?

Skip this next paragraph if you have NOT been diagnosed clinically depressed…

(Before I explain any further, this is my disclaimer…If you have been diagnosed clinically depressed and have a prescription, continue working with your doctor and CONTINUE to take your meds! I know you immediatly want to argue with me because you hate taking meds, but trust me I know what I am talking about. It is okay you can still enjoy this journey and learn from my writings, classes and or celebrations and YES, I hope someday your doctor says, “You are completely healed” However, until then please continue your regimen. I have some new ones with my leg that ,grrrr, sometimes irritate me too, but it is for my healing, so I continue!)

Why would anyone, with all that I have and how blessed I am, ever be depressed? I asked myself. I have felt down times when something energy shattering has happened. That is a normal sadness…losing a loved one, focusing on lack of, feeling inadequate, you know, the normal sadness or depressed emotions throughout life.

So WHY do we, who have everything and are enjoying life, to its fullest, have these times, where you just want to go back to bed?

Of course, I had to look up the definition of depression…

Is it just me or do both of those definitions combine together to mean…Less Than?

Wow! Yes, depression means less than. Which makes a great deal of sense, even clinically diagnosed, have less than or too much of something which is to the extreme, creating an emotion of ‘less than.’

Hmmmm, could it be a depressed emotional state is as simple as allowing the mind to remember what you have lacked and how less than you are now.

This becomes more and more intriguing to me. If I woke up a bit depressed today, enough to say, “I just don’t feel good today.”

What ‘lack’ am I focused on? I am improving daily, have very few true worries, my family is wonderful and becoming more and more extraordinary by the day.

I figured mine out! Have you figured out yours?

At first I was planning on sharing my ‘conclusion’ as to why in the world I would be depressed! However, I am allowing you to have your own reason. This allows you to NOT have my experience to compare to. Whether your reason is a better reason or not. Because, pssst…your reason is good enough!

Whatever, it is you feel less than about, right now, I want you to go to a mirror and say, “I love you! You are enough and I love you, I love you, I love you! Go ahead! If you are at a crappy job, with a mean and degrading partner, or you are beating yourself up…it doesn’t matter at this moment, excuse yourself, for a minute and say to you, “I love you and I accept you!”

It works! It resets, the ‘lack’ that is deep rooted in your subconscious, to enough and acceptance.

Depressed? Don’t know why? Now you know why. Not saying a little down time, every now and again, isn’t necessary because it most definetly is! However, the sooner you can stop those emotions the better! So begin today…I love myself, I accept and appreciate me! Over and over.

When and if someone is degrading you begin to hum hum hum 🎶🎶🎶🎵🎶🎵 I love and accept myself!!! La di da…I appreciate me 🎶🎶🎶🎵🎶🎵.

Allow the beautiful words to be what you hear rather than the vomit, coming out of theirs. If you are beating yourself up because of lack, STOP.

You nor anyone else can change what has been. No one! Now decide, can I proceed in this environment, reliving the past or accusing myself of lack, for the rest of my life? Psssst, I will tell you a secret, If you want to be happy you must focus on abundance and leave the ‘lack of’ in the past!

So am I still depressed? No, just grateful for the emotion to explore and share!

(This is where we want to do a Seminar on Happiness, next year, let me know what you think?)

Listen…👂you are capable of abundance in life…love, financial and spiritual! You do deserve the best for you and in turn your best will be the best for everyone.

God Bless

My greatest hope…is if you are struggling with depression, you will search for where you feel less than and begin to accept you can’t change the past, so look ahead look up and feel abundant.

Livelove

&

Carryon

Www.livelovellc.org

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Change is inevitable; Self Doubt is a reminder

As we all know change occurs second by second, whether you control the change or simply allow it, now that ‘changes’ EVERYTHING! However, what about self-doubt? What part of self-doubt can assist us in dealing with or controlling the change in our lives?

Could it be that self-doubt is a reminder that you can control how the, inevitable changes, occur in your life.

If we know changes are going to happen, we know everything in our lives, is not going to stick to the plan, why not utilize those ‘not so good’ self doubting, moments to empower you?

How? Simple, recognize that self- doubt is that friend that forces you to think about the worse case scenario. No, I am not an advocate for ‘what ifs’ however, what if, this doubt serves a vital purpose in accomplishing great things or taking the simpler, more paved road and enjoying the ride.

Either or the opportunity to recognize this moment of wallowing in what has been or could be, can be (if you choose) a great asset to your ‘happiness’ tool box.

Next time you experience that moment of OMG! What am I doing? How will I find my path? I can’t do this, I am not good enough! Moments, choose a time to let it go.

For example: You are stepping out on a limb, the limb feels wobbly and you are contemplating what can, will or might happen. You would weigh all the outcomes/options and either set a limit of how far you can go or keep walking and see what happens. Either or you will have change. You will have an outcome. You also chose all of those outcomes!

Set a time frame to poop or get off the pot. If you want to control or learn to enjoy all changes, when self-doubt appears, allow it for a set time or space.

Next, be grateful for the opportunity to weigh all options and MOVE ON. Allow the short-lived negative emotion to propel you into the wonderful, terrific, fabulous life you have always wanted.

I am so excited for us! As I am allowing my life to be utilized as a messenger. A messenger for you and I to live for the best in and of you & me.

I know life has hit you upside the head several times! I know when just arriving in the valley, you struggle with seeing a way to begin climbing to the top, again.

This change has been since the day you were born. When you took that first breath you began adjusting with the changes in environment, how you ate and how you slept.

You have what it takes to live the life you have always wanted. It’s up to you, how long you allow the changes to hit you, like a ton of bricks. Or how you utilize self-doubt. Either or you will have change, you will experience down & out times and only you can decide how to allow self doubt to assist you or hender you.

Livelove

&

Carryon

http://www.livelovellc.org/home

The real mammogram, part two…

Somebody, asked, “Which part of the last story was fiction?”

I giggled a little until I was almost rudely laughing in my friends face! (Good thing she knows me). Anyways, as I attempted to get it straightened out, I replied with, “You know me! I will never admit how silly I am, especially about going to the doctor.”

She looked at me with a half glare and a half stare. However, she figured out I was only admitting SOME of it was true! 😂😂😂

This next story I may have written about, before, but I do hope to help any other big chickens, like me, get their mammogram!

After my crazy escapades throughout the day, I did actually miss my first mammogram! When I arrived, I apologized over and over again. (Thinking, she would be rude and snippy because I messed up the schedule).

The sweet lady, probably around thirty, said, “Calm down! We have mix up in schedules all the time.”

“Now give me a minute, I will look at the schedule and see what we can do.”

I thought, “Wow! She is simply precious!”

As I waited, shifting my foot from one side to the other, looking around and day dreaming of another day I could take off work, to of course, finally get this over with! I think maybe December or… January would be better after the holidays!

My thoughts were rapidly interrupted when, Margaret (whom I thought was a sweetheart) said, “Just have a seat, we have an opening in like fifteen minutes!”

WHAT? Now wait a cotton pickin minute! I wanted to shake my head noooo in a random motion and take off sprinting for the door! I think I can make it if I take proper position, get set, ready, GO! Okay no, I didn’t sprint out, instead I took a seat.

When she called my name, I can remember thinking, you got this, no worries.

The nurse took my vitals and she said, “Calm down Mrs. Drake. You are making your blood pressure be elevated.”

“Okay…I am really trying.”

Then I stepped on the scale and thought I would make a joke, I snickered and said, “I think I need to have somebody break my elbow, so I can’t get the fork to my mouth.” (Laughing and laughing at my own joke).

“Naa, it wouldn’t work they would hook straws together and feed you milk shakes!”

Oh boy, she is good! She never missed a beat, said it and kept on walking. Before she left me in the ‘other’ waiting room, she did giggle and remark with, “That was funny though, keep the utensils from your mouth!” Shakes her head and walks away.

In the beginning it was one large breasted lady sitting with me. She was kind of a mixture between Rosanne and/or the blonde medium, on tv. (But not as dolled up as the medium).

She began, “Hello, it’s your day eh? Mine too! They sometimes get you in and out, but other times you must wait.”

I smiled and didn’t say anything, I couldn’t have anyways!

She continued,”Don’t you hate these things? My husband told me he would take me out for dinner after this because he knows how bad I hate them. Don’t you hate them?” (She sucks in a huge breath of air to ensure she would have enough to finish her rambling).

“I mean and really they could get a better technician, she always has cold hands and a crappy personality. She is not personable. Why do they hire old bitter-bitties to do such a delicate job? I mean it hurts when she smashes these into that machine! Then she says get closer, stand up straight, suck it in, let it out, don’t move. All the while she is pulling and turning my boobs.”

Shew, she took a breath, but only to end with, “Don’t you agree?”

Don’t tell her Teena, just nod your head and let it go! It’s all I could think. However, I am really honest and of course I said, “I don’t know, I have never had one.” (With a quiver in my voice).

“What!!! Oh let me see, let me see.”

She turns me towards her, as if she was going to give me an exam. Looks at my breast and says, “You should be fine, I have alot of boob, so it hurts me more.”

As she was reliving all of her past mammograms and how horrific they were, a small framed, yet tall, lanky woman had slipped in the waiting room and strategically sat down, closest to the door. She quietly, almost as if she were talking to herself, chimed in, “I hate these things, my boobs are so fragile, it hurts and her hands are so cold,” (As if she frequented the mammograms so much, she knew the technician, like they had coffee together every week).

This clucking chatter continued to grow by leaps and bounds. As the loud, boisterous lady continued to attempt to ease my mind, new ladies appeared one by one. All had a new horror story. Some where about others and yet some were almost coming to life, as they relived each detail, of the dreaded, torturing mammogram!

If you have never had one, READ ON! It gets better, I promise!

As each name was called to enter behind ‘The Door’ I decided to change the scene, for me!

I mean (not trying to offend anyone), but I love my breasts. And I will do anything to keep them, even if it is essential, to endure a little pain.

As I slowly approached the gigantic door, I remember, physically lifting the girls up a bit, as to reassure them, “We got this!”

The small, late fifties, technician repeated my name, our eyes met and she began, in a robotical way, to explain what was about to happen and her expectations of me. I listened intently, looking for a joke to slide in and break the ice. There, right there Teena… “Now, Mrs. Drake there might be some discomfort, please just bare with me…”

I abruptly interrupted, “Mmmm I might like it…” (Pause, hold up, rewind, I quickly stopped my silly joke).

“Did you say pain?” (stammering around as if to explain I wasn’t meaning the pain, I would like, ummmmm, I was just trying to joke…)

Okay, it’s time for me to panic. I tried to explain my silly words and attempted to nicely tell her, what all I had been told about her. Of course it came out all wrong and I was for sure, I offended her. Until she had my right girl in her cold, bony hand then added the other one…awkwardly I jumped and shivered, a bit, as she gently placed it where it needed to be. As she began to release and LOWER the smasher hammer (I do not know what it is called), a quick pause, briefly happened and as the fear appeared on my face, we both BURST INTO LAUGHTER!!!!

“I mean do you ever think about telling people what you really think?” I asked as my laughter continued through each word.

“All the time! I mean it’s not like I am going to punch you and I try to be careful, but I only have so much, I can do.”

I chimed in as to assist her in her case, “Exactly, it could be worse.”

Not only did we become friends, I survived my first mammogram without a bruise and both girls intact!

Just remember everything is all based on perspective. How you perceive the world around you is, how you perceive yourself. Follow your path with a joyful heart!

God Loves You, No Matter What!

Livelove

&

Carryon

The message is clear, life is too short to live in fear. Enjoy the now.

Www.livelovellc.org/home

(Hope to see you December 8th!)

A Mammogram?

As I was talking to Eric about my post about legacies, he began asking me about my own. It was a short lived conversation because he really does know what I want people to remember, lol. Why? because when I am practicing a speech or workshop I constantly stop and ask him to, “Repeat back to me what he heard.”

Only to ensure I am sending the message that is directed in the right way!

So he quickly diverts my attention by telling me about something funny or a great comedian he heard on Sirus. Today was Ms. Pat! He began chuckling then began laughing as he was telling me about her description of Mammograms! He was laughing so hard and then he said it! He said, “Teena, I thought of you and your ‘funny’ story about mammograms. I couldn’t quit laughing!”

First of all, if you have been reading my blog for very long, you know that my husband, best friend and better half does not think I am funny! Lol we tease about it all the time. So there is the first YAY for me!

Second, MAMMOGRAM! Oh my goodness! Are you ready to laugh?? If you don’t have time to relax and read this, STOP, and come back to it later because you will probably get a terrific laugh out of this story!!!

I remember the day like it was today I had just returned home from the doctor. It was a simple Biometric testing so no worries, I thought!

My doctor asked how old are you? I told her. She said, “When was your last mammogram?”

I stopped and said, “Duh, never!”

I thought she was not going to let me come home without scheduling and that day! I finally convinced her I would, just so I could go home 😉.

Of course I am not a good liar and she knows that, so I had a scheduled appointment before I left.

As the day approached I think I called that gigantic, overwhelming office building three times. Oh no big deal! I thought I might have the flu, the next call I wanted to ensure I was on the schedule and who was that doctor again, my final call is I needed the address. (As I laugh to myself while writing my thoughts and fears from the past). I know that if I had so much as broken a finger nail, I would go back to bed and cancel!

I did not cancel and I was proud of myself. (I know this admits that I am a huge baby, but you must know I didn’t even take my mommy and I always take my mommy to the doctor with me, always, even after 40!) I drove directly to the beautifully adorned hospital with its gorgeous chandelier that does nothing except make my premiums go up, and… (pause, inhale/exhale) went up three floors, opened the door to the correct number (hold your breath for just a second so when you laugh you will be able to catch your breath) I had entered a male enhancement office. No! No one reads the sign on the door!!!! The lady looked at me a bit funny, but I guess this kind of thing happens all the time, right? I continue on, to sign in. My delicate signature that is swoopy, curved and yet big enough to be bold, Teena Drake,

The secretary had disappeared, so I sat down! I remember thinking it must be guys days to get mammograms! They must need to be checked regularly, right? (I truly don’t know anything about men receiving them or not). A few minutes passed, maybe more like fifteen or twenty! The lady calls my name up to the window and I promptly jump up with insurance card in hand, slide it through the window and she leans back as though I had cooties or something, snootily pushed the card back towards me and says, “Where are you suppose to be?”

Still confused I reply with, “What do you mean? I am here for a Mammogram and I am wondering how long this is going to take?”

She says Ms. Drake, with a southern draw, you are in a male enhancement clinic. That’s why I am asking you where you are suppose to be!”

At that moment I stopped and was as still as a statue! Don’t turn around, Teena, just say thank you, step backwards keep walking towards the door! I kept thinking, how am I going to get out of here, without looking at these men. I am surely not judging, at all. I have heard some stories that would say go baby go! However, this is entirely a different story!

Okay, maybe I should turn around say real loud and very Clown like, “You guys ROCK!!! NO LIKE REALLY YOU ROCK!!!!

Nope because truly I have no idea what I am talking about. I turned on my heals, politely bowed my head thanked her (for nothing) and exited the building.

Needless to say I missed my mammogram, had to reschedule and will include that story in my next segment of Mammogram??

Actually I should have entitled this entire post Fake News!!!

However, then you might not have read it and I wouldn’t have had this teachable moment!!!!!

Please continue to read, hold your attention five more minutes! This is important!!!!!!

If you enjoyed this reading and you laughed then my mission was accomplished!!!

However, my next mission is to assist you in life! As a teacher I must explain why this next message is super important to millennials, adults, students it doesn’t matter who you are!!!!

The majority of the last story I wrote was fiction. No I am not giving you an English project, but rather an important life lesson!!!!!!

You see when I was a child and searched for something to read it was in a library, where everything was clear and definite! Fiction/children/nonfiction/news/documentaries! The rows were marked, the books were genre labeled, there were no muddy waters or lines to cross.

Then I heard someone recently, in the grocery store, “Are you sure, I think I read on Facebook…”

The rest of the conversation was not worth repeating. However, the statement reminded me of the multiple research papers I had scored, that were filled with ‘fake news.’ Yet, those students would stand behind their research no matter what! Others would look at me puzzled as to why I would question Google!

Your message is, when fact checking, do it again and again and maybe even again. Also if you are fact checking someone said or did something to you, call them and ask. Because it’s merely fiction or gossip unless you hear it for yourself!

In such a fast paced world with all information, thoughts, and advertising swarming us, twenty four- seven, it becomes difficult to decipher facts from fiction. In all cases check and check again before you speak!

Don’t forget Dec. 8th is upcoming! It’s open to the public, begins at 7!

Educators, please use my writings and or several others, for examples of ‘unmarked’ genres. Even if they have a PhD, check your facts about his or ger credibility. (Not necessarily this one unless you enjoy answering questions about male enhancements). But have them follow my blog or you and allow the students to edify my writings.

Thank you for reading as always I cherish you for supporting me! My main mission is to share with you my life lessons, to allow you to enhance your own life, by being the happiest, best YOU!

Livelove

Carryon

http://www.livelovellc.org/home

Thanksgiving Morning on the Farm

Of course I woke up at 4:30 in the morning, on the farm. However, this time I do not have to roll out of bed and start the Turkey. So I rolled over, tossed and turned for over an hour, finally slipped out of bed.

The sun was peeking up over the hill creating a sparkly blanket of frost across the land. As almost if old man Frost wanted to freeze time, even if for just a moment, to allow those of us up, to observe in amazement, his works.

Normally, when ‘back on the farm’ I am rushing around, barking orders, freaked out because something needs to be done, but this year I am not. Instead, I am enjoying the dancing moments where past meets the present and future is so boldly introducing herself! (In a good way).

I relish in the memories of laughters, tears, excitement and all other emotions attached to every crack, bump, or splashed syrup on the ceiling stains, still not fixed from previous years. As I reflect back I remember all the funny events of Thanksgivings. Once we moved to the river Eric knew when Baw Baw couldn’t, I would!

We have had family gatherings from Thanksgiving, Christmas, all the way to hey, its finally Spring, let’s have a get together. I remember one year, I counted 50 people and other than my farm family, there were maybe three other relatives, the rest were our adopted family members. (Which we tried counting the other day, how many of those we have. It made us laugh and get all sentimental because the number was too difficult to solidify. We would become so wrapped up in naming someone and then attaching a fun or funny story, that the list continues to grow).

Sorry, Eric tells me all the time I get off on tagents, that was one of them.

Today, Thanksgiving Day 2017 is a bit different. The kids were all busy, Eric & I just arrived and have been in paradise for so long we struggled with returning to 21 degrees. So I am so excited that I get to go celebrate with one of my favorite little girls!!! My niece Lucy!

Although change isn’t always easy, it is inevitable. As for me I choose to embrace the changes, make the most of the new opportunities, revel over the past, enjoy the now…this moment.

Maybe you are like me and you are sitting on your front porch, wrapped up in something similar to a cacoon, listening to the Crows call, and you want to be sad for a moment due to the ‘change’ in traditions. However, I ask you to tilt your head from one side and then the other, close your eyes…hold them shut for one extra moment. Now open them and wait for your eyes to refocus. What do you see? A different perspective.

Don’t worry about ‘creating’ a new Tradition, that can sometimes create more anxiety than good, but rather enjoy right now! Whether you are with one person or several, maybe you are alone, it doesn’t matter search to feel good, this moment, feel terrific. Then expect another terrific moment and another and before you can blink your eyes, this day will be another memory! Hopefully even better than you expected.

If someone forgets to tell you today: ” YOU! Are AWESOME, WORTHY, LOVABLE and AMAZING!

Grateful for you!!!

Livelove

&

Carryon

http://www.livelovellc.org/home

Be Careful! What You Ask for or don’t you will get it either way…

20171113_1711251607508436.jpgThe funniest thing happened to me today! Totally unexpected! Before Eric left for work he was kind of sad and so was I! We had been together so much lately, we didn’t want to be separated for long periods of time and that long drive was not near as much fun, alone. As soon as the garage door shut, I opened my computer. As I searched for flights home, I became quickly discouraged. Three and four hundred dollars, ONE WAY!

I closed my computer and went on packing the car. I shrugged my shoulders and thought that was silly. As I began to pour my first cup of coffee, I said to myself, “I seriously would wait to go home, if I could ride with my honey, but my ticket would have to be between one hundred and twenty, no more than 150.”

As I began to rest a moment before leaving, I decided to open my computer and look up some black Friday sales. After being logged in about five minutes, a message showed up stating, “Kentucky to Kansas one fifty-five.”

I will admit, at first the twilight zone began to play, in my head. I thought about all the new marketing techniques, but then my attention was quickly diverted back to more information on this flight. As I read it, I text mom to ask her opinion, text Eric and danced around in front of the computer like a butterfly. Oh, what do I do? I felt a little bit anxious. I know I don’t need to spend the money. I read detail for detail again! Then it happened! I received yet another incentive taking it down below one hundred dollars! My excitement and freakiness were growing. I hadn’t heard from mom or Eric, tried to call Nick to ensure he wouldn’t be mad at me, no answer. Finally, I pushed that tiny little button to purchase. Then itinerary wouldn’t show until I selected the day. It was bizarre! It turns out everyone was fine with my decision. No one was upset and I was able to ride home with Eric.

However, this situation created a unique thought process. I continually study the law of attraction, the teachings of a wide variety of religions and how it all relates to each of us. This one event is among many. Ask and it shall be given. What about you? Haven’t you had an experience similar to this one?

The reason for the title? Because isn’t it true? Have you ever said, “I want? Or I fear? Or whatever you have said, you watched it come to fruition. Not necessarily about someone else, but you,

As I scribed story after story about my husband’s beautiful family, it was difficult to stay on task. Not because they were dull, but due to the fact everything they spoke came to fruition. “We are going to get married. We are moving out of this trailer, into a new home. We are moving to the country. We are moving to Hawaii!”

(Just to provide you with a small synopsis so you can follow along.)

But truly these two teenagers were destined for failure if they based their future on the past. They didn’t come from a great deal of money and they were young and dumb.

I can add to their list from above, ten times or more. They may have had some rough times, but both of them would refer back to, “How good they had it and how fabulous their lives are now.”

They spoke it and it evolved. I am not so powerful as to snap my fingers or say abracadabra, however, it is true- speak it and speak it enough and it will appear.

I know I seem to say it over and over again, I can’t help it, “Live life, ask for what you want, enjoy each other and Be Happy!!!!”

 

God Bless

 

Livelove

&

Carryon

 

The Lopsided Cake…

I could have never been a baker because they would have to throw a delicious lopsided cake away, based on principal. However, the truth is I am enjoying serving more and more lopsided, imperfect, delicious, ooey, gooey, cakes. It may seem odd for me to create this comparison to life, but if you stop and think about it, maybe you will see.

In the past I would become so upset over the smallest things. Oh my if someone didn’t like me or worst yet, thought bad of me! I mean someone told me the other day they didn’t appreciate or agree with one of my blogs. I batted my eyes, truly listened to their concern and apologized. No, I wasn’t angry, hurt or frustrated! I kind of understood where they were coming from. (I will come back to this conversation later in the post).

No, I have never been a baker and I am pretty sure most of my cakes have always been losided, similar to a volcano drooping down on one side, unevenly. However, in other ways I was a perfectionist! I expected everything to be perfect. Actually that’s not quite true, I expected, for everyone else, to have expectations, of me, to be perfect! That makes so much more sense, to me.

You see Ms. Debbie’s words of wisdom rings, throughout my head, when someone misunderstands something I have written or stated, “Teena, you need to finish that thought; not everyone knows you well enough to follow the many thoughts rolling through your head. That means you could be easily misunderstood.”

It is true. My thoughts are swirling by the millions and when I become excited or extremely emitting energy in one way or another, the outcome of my words are not always self explainatory!

Back to the point! In the past I always thought I had to be perfect. Although it is unrealisitic nor possible, I placed those restraints on myself. I always wished I could blame this on someone else, but I can’t. It isn’t because of the expectations my mother had, husband or children. Not what the school system placed on me nor the parents or students. It was me! I lived in a perfect world and if anyone messed it up, I would almost fall apart just like a baker would if he/she had to serve one of my slippery sloping cakes.

However, now I just don’t have it in me. Not really that I have slowed down or my thoughts have become less and less. That is far from the truth! I rarely have any particular expectations anymore. I feel myself evolving to one of the richest parts of my life, yet. It is amazing! The feeling of butterflies fluttering in my stomach, when I know Eric is on his way home. The excitement that overwhelmes me when I get to see all my children, family and friends. I am truly grateful and blessed.

I can remember (which I will only remember this for a moment then I am letting it go forever) coming home and being filled with anxiety, stress and aggitation. I worried about how everyone, I do mean everyone in my life chidren, husband, mom, dad, grandma, teachers, peers, students, principals…I worried about! I can’t tell you how many tears I have shed over someone being ‘mad at me.’ If you have ever felt this way or continue to live this way, read on I am about to spill the beans of how it is ‘fake news.’

Come in closer, get real quiet while reading this…IT IS NOT IMPORTANT! Yes, you heard it here first! Perfectionism is not important nor will it add to your life. It is true. Being ‘Perfect’ is ‘Fake News.’ I have meditated this entire year, almost everyday, to gather information or muddle through some theories, so I could share with you! Guess what? I have even tried to Remember why I hated someone (never really experienced HATRED, nor do I want to, so let’s call it disliked their actions). Could remember very little. Almost like when you soak an aspirin to give to an elderly, attempting to swallow. The memory still had a little substance, but not enough to recognize what it was and the end result was no more pain or suffereing from that situation! Wow!!!! In other words, “This too will pass.”

Yes, some memories carry a powerful impact both negative or positive, but the strongest impact is how you felt and how you feel. Instead of struggling or wrestling with the past, go bake a cake! Make it lopsided, oozing with melted icing and enjoy the laughter about your blunders.

It is time to come out of the closet, perfectionist. You are worthy of being terrific without being perfect. Just do it! Drop your rules and regulations for yourself and let us see the beautiful YOU! The VIBRANT YOU! It makes me so excited, I just want to break into song! You know a random song that says, “You are wonderful, be happy, enjoy, mess up and laugh along the way!!!”

Hmmmm I might have something!

Back to the blog posting that might have not been a complete or self explanatory concept, I admit I have imperfections! Thank you for noticing and better yet thanks for reading my blog! As always I hope you are inspired and motivated to live a Happy Life!

God Bless

Livelove

&

Carryon

Had to use this picture because all the lopsided cakes I look up were, what? PERFECT!!! Go ahead and try it, type in Google search, ‘Lopsided Cakes’ grrrrrr they were adorable!!!! Lol oh well be happy!