Tag Archives: family

Are you afraid of the dark?

When looking for light, bright, sunshine emotions…do you go into the darkness searching for light? Or do you stand in the darkness hoping someone will find you, with a light? Or are you the light that shines bright and attracts more and more lights?
I said all of that to say this…if you are desiring change…meaning more lightheartedness, happy, sunshine emotions (because what other change could you want?) Be the light you are searching for so that you will have more and more sunshine coming your way.
Remember, tring to fix the past is like trying to make your butt hole beautiful. Ewwww I don’t even want to try that…do you?

Our coaching services are in full swing. If you need extra help dealing with school, work, your children, family or any other annoyances life can throw your way, check us out.

As for our website…we are building a more user friendly one very soon, so for now…send us an email

Livelove.teena@gmail.com

Your opening line can be, “Hey, I need your help…” or (be like me) “Help, I have fallen and I can’t get up!”

Within hours we can have you hooked up with the best suited coach for your situation.

Yes, I realized I couldn’t help everyone so at Livelove, we are hiring coaches to better fit your needs.

If you want a list…email us.

If you want more sunshine…email us.

If you want to find out how to be happy, no matter what or live with joy in your heart…email us.

Or maybe you want me to stop typing on this post okay…email us.

Hey did I mention either follow, check us out or HELLO…email us Livelove.teena@gmail.com

Livelove

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Carry On

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Delete It!

Do you ever look at e-mails, social media, cell phones or anything else exposing your name and think…What if I deleted EVERYTHING! I never think of that either!

As I chuckle to myself about that last statement, I wonder if this is what our children think. Not deleting everything, but about life. For example, “Mommy, Have you ever felt like life was overwhelming? Have you ever felt like ‘giving up’?”

As the child, who is struggling with what may seem silly to an adult, ponders asking this question to their mommy or daddy.  I can only imagine what they think an adult would respond with. For example, “Of COURSE, I feel like giving up. Have you not seen all the crud going on? Ball practice, work, birthdays. But what do you have to worry about? You are being cared for.”

PARENTS! I am not saying you are doing anything wrong. I promise life is overwhelming at times and young parents today, have a great deal of pressure. Which is why I am writing this post.

If you have times of glaring at your connections to the world and you feel overwhelmed, then your child is probably feeling the same way.

Therefore, I am suggesting take time and DELETE IT! I know it sounds crazy, but when you are feeling overwhelmed with LIFE, make up a game with your family and have a delete it night.

Example:

  1. Explain to your children or partner, we are going to have a delete it night.
  2. Have everyone
    1. write their issues
    2. speak it
    3. sing it   Example: Child- I made an F, my friend was mean to me, Work was awful today. Everyone is allowed to share what they are feeling overwhelmed, hopeless, or depressed about.
  3. Take time to listen to everyone’s sharing of their feelings.
  4. BUT! After each complaint EVERYONE says, “Delete It!”
  5. Or you can sing “DELETE IT!”

The point is to reverse the trajectory of your thoughts on what is and has been. Because you can’t change the past…no matter what!

Deleting it allows:

  1. Acceptance that everyone has down times and feels like giving up.
  2. A switch in vibrations.
  3. Allows everyone to see how life carrys on even when it feels cruddy at this moment…IT will get better!

As always…God Bless and KNOW you are LOVED UNCONDITIONALLY!

Livelove

&

Carry On

If you would like a little help with ‘Life’ let us know. Livelove.teena@gmail.com and we will begin your Happy Coaching as soon as possible.

Life is meant to be experienced.

Www.livelovellc.org/home

 

 

Happy Coaching 101 (Day three)

I felt like Wednesday was the day to share this particular coaching session. Honestly, I could write a book on what this lady taught me. Her messages, her thoughts, sometimes silence and her perspective. You see, this special lady taught me how to understand my messages, to accept them and most definetly share them. I have been strictly instructed to only tell her circumstances and an extremely vague description at that.

This lady had suffered great loss in her life. She has buried a child and her husband. That is all you are allowed to know. The saddest part is I was not allowed to save the majority of her coaching messages. Only those that were extra special, such as this one. However, those were her wishes.

Message: First…create a map,  a map of your life include pebbles, big rocks, water, whatever terrain that best describes you and your life. Including pathways, roads, highways, speed limits, marriage, births, special events, whatever it may be that you can remember, about your life up until this point. It is your creation. You may share with me if you so desire or not, either way it is up to you.

Second…I am givng you an eraser. A gigantic eraser and your instructions are simple, ERASE ALL THE BAD! I mean erase every tear, painful moment, trial or tribulation, everytime you felt less than, worthless, fearful, hopeless, destroyed. Erase them all.

Her response was priceless! But guess what? You are going to have to wait to see, what her response was and my come back message, until tomorrow. Why? Because I want you to create the design of this woman, her age, feelings, appearance and create this ‘hero’ in your head. And maybe you can go ahead and begin to create your life map. Who knows, we might be on to something, psst, I think we are.

To Be Continued…

Livelove

&

Carryon

Www.Livelovellc.org/home

Email us: Livelove.teena@gmail.com

God Bless Everyone!

Hey, if you are just now reading this post, skip back through Monday and Tuesday’s post Happy Coaching 101- 1 & 2. These are samples of actual coaching messages some people have received.

More recent Thanksgiving Past…

As most of you know Eric and I went to Hawaii to see mom and dad as well as, celebrate our twenty fifth anniversary. What you may not know is it was their forty ninth Wedding Anniversary on November 2nd! It was awesome. Therefore, Eric and I, took them out to eat for a special dining experience, on the ocean to celebrate.

Betty and I got all dressed up in our aloha dresses, adorned our beautiful outfits with Jewlry, by none other than Beautiful Bling by Betty. We were the cats meow!

As we drove up to the restaurant the torches were lit and the dancing fire illuminated the walk way, to a ambiance for love and romance. Ocean breeze, family and friends. Both our heads were spinning. Stop! Selfie time. I took a group photo with my handy dandy selfie stick. I really think we were floating on a cloud of happy emotions, to the extreme that we began reminiscing about times past, that we were all together and how wonderful it was.

Now let me stop right here! Don’t take me the wrong way, we all had a wonderful, fabulous, delicious dinner that night on November 2nd, 2017. But read on and see if you can see why I blame the ‘ambiance’ of this romantic evening on the stupidity, Betty and myself were about to begin and continue.

As we told our friends, who were joining us, about the different family gathering memories, we had. Everyone could feel the flucuations of happiness then the wave of, just a smidge, of sadness. (Not because we were unhappy now, but sometimes it is sad when so many traditions have changed).

That’s when it happened. I had one martini and I don’t know which one of us spoke up first, but one of, Betty or I, said, “We should have an old fashion Thanksgiving dinner. Mmmm all that good food, Uncle Ben’s Wild Rice, gravy, broccoli casserole. That is it.! Let’s do it!”

We both so eagerly shook our heads in an accepting manner of how ‘good’ of girls and wives, as we truly are! Almost as if all of the grand things we have done for our families, came down to the most memorable times.

The guys attempted to talk us out of this grandious, hair brain scheme of ours. But no, no they weren’t talking us out of it! We were sure this would be a fun time and we were jumping in with both feet first!

As the days and nights went by, we were busy, busy. Hoola class, beach hoping and bike riding. Shopping and enjoying each other’s company. Until, Dum Diddy dum!!!! (Drum roll please) The day for Thanksgiving Dinner had arrived! Gosh has it already been two weeks? Naaaaa surely not!

The best way I can explain the affects of Hawaii is; every inch of your body is JELLO. Worries cross your mind, but flee as quick as they enter. If one thing I know, for sure, is going backwards to ‘The Good Ole Days’ isn’t as much fun as soaking up the sun in our ‘BEST’ days!

At least I felt like that. I was unsure if Betty felt like this so, I rolled out of bed and began to create a list. The entire time I was writing I would write a dish and then write beside it a label…difficult or simple. Which meant I was already back pedaling from all of this ‘traditional’ crud. Yes, it was fun, but it was a great deal of work, especially for Betty and I because we had always been the two who seemed to expect ourselves, to work alot, to please as many as possible.

Now don’t get me wrong, we have always enjoyed our families and have both taken pride in our efforts to open our homes and demonstrate loving hospitality. (Of course she is better at being more hospitable than me, but she is a better cook too, so who cares, I love and accept myself lol).

However, at this point I was pretty sure we were both over the ‘Old Fashion’ Thanksgiving dinner. When she saw my list she began to laugh and laugh. She was like this is alot of work isn’t it?

Many funny epiphanies came to me, during my process, of getting ready and I shared them with Ray and Eric. Both men quickly reminded me,”We tried to talk you both out of this! But nooooo you insisted!”

I stood there similar to a statue, listening to everyone’s chatter. How true were their claims? In all actuality , extremely true! Brutally, honestly, TRUE!

We had done this to ourselves!

Now let me wrap up the story part, before I bring it to full circle!

We had the best visit with mom and dad than ever before. We both truly enjoyed being in their presence and in paradise. Betty and I cooked a Thanksgiving meal ‘traditional’ Drake’s style!

Of course, I assisted, but my dishes fell under the simple or some even bought category. However, we pulled it off! It was the most mouth watering, delicious, fabulous, exquisite meal I have had in quite sometime.

I am grateful for the entire vacation and will cherish the sweet memories throughout our visit.

However, I learned some valuable lessons from the entire dinner ordeal. I feel it’s best to bullet them…

  • You don’t always have to relive a tradition to enjoy the memory.
  • When you are feeling stressed about something almost like a regret, talk to that person, be honest. You never know they may feel the same way.
  • Sometimes what we think makes other people happy, is not real, ask them if it is something they feel emotional about. For example: our husbands could have cared less, what we cooked, they were grateful we cooked at all.
  • When looking back at a memory and it feels all warm and fuzzy enjoy it, but ensure before you say you want to relive it, you remember the entire story.
  • For example: I love my children so much and I must say I enjoyed raising them, but to say I would want to relive it would be ludicrous.
  • Although we were resistant the day of, we readjusted and shopped one day and cooked the next. Allow yourself readjustment time. If it is a bad time in your life pause and allow yourself to rethink and readjust, how you feel. (No this wasn’t a bad time in our life. It was actually funny how great of a time it truly was, but this works if you are having a worse time, than we were).
  • Feel it? Feel just how you feel right now. If you don’t like this feeling, then ask yourself, how do I want to feel?
  • What will bring you closer to that?

Thank you for reading this posting.

I am truly grateful for you! Wish you the best.

Want to host a Happy Coaching Session for your friends? Or maybe a Happy Celebration for your employees…email us

Livelove.teena@gmail.com

Livelove

&

Carryon

Written by: Momma Teena

Thanksgiving Morning on the Farm

Of course I woke up at 4:30 in the morning, on the farm. However, this time I do not have to roll out of bed and start the Turkey. So I rolled over, tossed and turned for over an hour, finally slipped out of bed.

The sun was peeking up over the hill creating a sparkly blanket of frost across the land. As almost if old man Frost wanted to freeze time, even if for just a moment, to allow those of us up, to observe in amazement, his works.

Normally, when ‘back on the farm’ I am rushing around, barking orders, freaked out because something needs to be done, but this year I am not. Instead, I am enjoying the dancing moments where past meets the present and future is so boldly introducing herself! (In a good way).

I relish in the memories of laughters, tears, excitement and all other emotions attached to every crack, bump, or splashed syrup on the ceiling stains, still not fixed from previous years. As I reflect back I remember all the funny events of Thanksgivings. Once we moved to the river Eric knew when Baw Baw couldn’t, I would!

We have had family gatherings from Thanksgiving, Christmas, all the way to hey, its finally Spring, let’s have a get together. I remember one year, I counted 50 people and other than my farm family, there were maybe three other relatives, the rest were our adopted family members. (Which we tried counting the other day, how many of those we have. It made us laugh and get all sentimental because the number was too difficult to solidify. We would become so wrapped up in naming someone and then attaching a fun or funny story, that the list continues to grow).

Sorry, Eric tells me all the time I get off on tagents, that was one of them.

Today, Thanksgiving Day 2017 is a bit different. The kids were all busy, Eric & I just arrived and have been in paradise for so long we struggled with returning to 21 degrees. So I am so excited that I get to go celebrate with one of my favorite little girls!!! My niece Lucy!

Although change isn’t always easy, it is inevitable. As for me I choose to embrace the changes, make the most of the new opportunities, revel over the past, enjoy the now…this moment.

Maybe you are like me and you are sitting on your front porch, wrapped up in something similar to a cacoon, listening to the Crows call, and you want to be sad for a moment due to the ‘change’ in traditions. However, I ask you to tilt your head from one side and then the other, close your eyes…hold them shut for one extra moment. Now open them and wait for your eyes to refocus. What do you see? A different perspective.

Don’t worry about ‘creating’ a new Tradition, that can sometimes create more anxiety than good, but rather enjoy right now! Whether you are with one person or several, maybe you are alone, it doesn’t matter search to feel good, this moment, feel terrific. Then expect another terrific moment and another and before you can blink your eyes, this day will be another memory! Hopefully even better than you expected.

If someone forgets to tell you today: ” YOU! Are AWESOME, WORTHY, LOVABLE and AMAZING!

Grateful for you!!!

Livelove

&

Carryon

http://www.livelovellc.org/home

Ghost of Thanksgiving Past…

I can smell the bacon sizzling, eggs a cracking, batters being whipped and beaten. Come about four o’clock in the morning, Thanksgiving morning. I would slip down the stairs as quietly as the old crickety floor would let me and slowly, ever so slowly, open the door at the bottom of the steps. Sliding my small little girl body through a sliver of an opening, to ensure I did not awaken my mom and dad, who were on the hide-a-way sofa in the, soon to be magical dining room.

As my bare feet touched the cold floor, I would cringe, drawing it back in hopes I would not groan so loudly, to wake everyone up. As I approached the opening to the doorway of the kitchen, I could hear her clanking the pans (as quietly as she could) and almost methodically dancing, in her house robe like a glowing angelic human. If I didn’t disturb her and freeze like a statue, I could hear her lightly singing a sweet hymn. Usually something like, Thank you Lord, for saving my soul or I will walk with Him and I will talk with him….

I try to hold my breath for as long as possible, so I can hear and watch her for just one more minute, only to slip on a rug, lose my balance and come sliding in the kitchen, butt first. She basically, keeps going and says, “Teena Gay, what are you doing up it is too early and you will be cranky before Thanksgiving dinner is served!”

As I began to whine and explain how excited I was and I rambled on, she seem to forget what she had said and would start talking to herself. Almost as if a check list was in her head and not even I could get her off track (Which if you know me I can get anyone off track, most of the time).

Mmmmmmmmm, can you smell it? I can! I can smell the green beans a bubbling, the turkey browning, the sweet pies a cooling. One by one a family member would emerge. Poppy would slip down the steps, wrap his arms around Baw Baw, giving her a reverse hug and a sweet peck on the cheek. She would always stop, pause and embrace his hugs and his kisses.

You know as I sit and write this I can’t help, but pause, close my eyes and as the tears stream down my face, I give thanks! I am grateful for these precious memories.

I remember thinking my grandmother was super woman! You know, I might be wrong, but until my Poppy passed away I think she cooked the majority of the food. I know we all pitched in something throughout the years, but honestly that was Violet Ashby’s legacy! Not just Thanksgiving Dinners, but bringing people together, by opening her home and preparing the most delicious, blessed and cooked with love meal anyone could ever imagine.

The time would quickly come, when those who weren’t in town, would begin to arrive. Oh the smiles on everyone’s face. The big hugs that seem to be never ending as the back screen door would open and SLAM, directly behind anyone who entered. Greetings, greetings!!!! It was like a house full of laughter and the energy was so strong it seemed as though, our farm home was coming to life celebrating hundreds of years of family, would vibrate and glow.

Finally, it was time to eat. Now most of the time as we all gathered around the ‘big people’s’ table or the ‘kids’ table off to the side (I don’t think I sat at the big people’s table until after I was an adult of like 25! Lolololol), the room would be so loud, Forman Hamilton who was the neighbor down the road, could hear us. However, once my Poppy, Uncle Bob, or Uncle Rod said, “Let’s bless this food…”

We all stopped talking and immediately grabbed hands and bowed our heads. It was like a snap of the fingers when it happened! Next, BRING ON THE FOOD!!! Heavenly Ham, terrific turkey, goodness gracious gravy, pluffy potatoes, stupendous slaw & stuffing and Pie, pie, pie! Did I forget to mention Butterscotch PIE!

We would all pass the food around the table: macaroni and cheese oh my!

As Thanksgiving approaches, enjoy each person you are with. Take time to put your phones down and turn off your technology for just a moment and record those smells, laughters, moment by moment sounds and events in your memory bank. Because you can never relive this time again. Next year will be different. It may not seem much different, but it will be. Everyone will be a year older, have new perspectives, some will pass others will be born, no matter what the only way you can relive a memory, is create one!

 

Thank you for reading, sending you much love!

 

Livelove

&

Carryon

Www.livelovellc.org/home

(Don’t forget to check out December 8th, our upcoming event/celebration is going to be fun!)

 

 

My Uncle Bob

It’s finally here! The birthday of the man, I have been itching to write about! Many of these stories have been tucked away, for when I let it all go and begin writing comedy, becuase I love him and his sly comical demeanor cracks me up.

See the man standing on the right? With a white shirt on? (Which is weird, he usually has a rich color of deep purple or blue, but it doesn’t matter, he always looks amazing.) This, ladies and gentleman is my Uncle Bob and after I complete this, you will wish he was yours.

(Aunt T and Uncle Bob)

Background: I have only heard stories about their first meeting, but it must have been wonderful. My Aunt T and Uncle Bob met in Bowling Green Kentucky at Western Kentucky University, over fifty years ago.

Both from neighboring counties, meeting at the university. After 6 months they were married and lived happily ever after. (That’s the story, thanks everyone!)

I can only imagine his excitement! He married one of the most beautiful women in the world. BUT… with beauty comes a family full of beautiful people and beautiful ideas (kind of?).

Bare with me! Yes, they have been married for a long time, they have two beautiful children, a wonderful son n law, adorable grand cats and four gorgeous grand children. But before all of that Uncle Bob married his sweet wife, who came with a sweet (Ha ha) farm family. LOL!

Uncle Bob had now acquired a brother and sister n law, who were still young, he never imagined what funny and chaotic things were in store for him, over the next fifty years or so!

Life has began:

I wonder when or if he ever began to truly understand the dynamics, of what he has taken on. I will say this he NEVER SHOWED his frustrations with all of us.

First Scott was born. My mom, Charlene, I believe was ten. In our family it is tradition for the grandmother to go and stay with their daughter for two weeks, after the baby is born. That means my Baw Baw, Violet, would be living with these newly weds. Hee hee, I giggle thinking about Baw Baw bossing everyone around and my Uncle Bob thinking what in the world have I done. He never said anything mean or hateful. (How do I know? Duh it’s Uncle Bob. I don’t have to be born to know how he is, He is just that AMAZING).

For a side note, my mom often wondered how he didn’t have a heart attack. Because she rode up on her bike with Scott in her basket and still he said nothing! We still chuckle about that.

Fast Forward: five years later my sister in spirit and my cousin for life was born, Trina Lou! Oh my, here we go again the entire family, but especially Baw Baw.

Three years later it’s me, it’s me not Sandra Dee, but little ole, meek, quiet, never says anything me, Teena Drake! What? You don’t agree? Okay, you are right, I was born talking.

Now I know, no one could have prepared this patient, gentle, kind caring, quiet understanding man about the next twenty years or more of his life, with the Ashby family.

I realize no one knows what the future holds and he would have been bored without us, however, let’s just say we put him to the test. I wish I could write ALL the funny stories about him, someday I will share them.

I do remember the day Trina Lou and I were discussing her dad’s temper. I laughed and laughed because I knew he was human, but a temper? Listen to her tell this…

“Teena, if you ever want to know if daddy is mad, watch his mouth!”

“What? His mouth? If my mom gets mad you better run because you don’t have to watch her mouth you will hear it.” (Me too, everyone knows if I am upset).

Trina continued giggling and lowering her voice to a whisper, “Seriously, he moves his jaw and licks his lips. I always know to move on. That’s how I know I am in trouble.”

Really? That’s it? She was telling the truth! Over forty years I have not heard him become angry, but I do watch his facial expressions, if I am concerned.

As years went on everyone has lived with Uncle Bob and Aunt T. Now I am not dumb by any means, however, I never realized how amazing my uncle Bob is and always has been, until I became an adult. When any of us were in limbo, needed a place to crash or live, or a hot meal or anything, Aunt T would say, “Come on over.” Or, “Sure you can live with us.”

I know she never thought twice! Sometimes, I think how the heck did my Uncle Bob do it! I am telling you it was always someone or something in our family. Card games, teenagers, Farm family, church friends even kids and grand kids of others. I bet if they had and register for all the people, who have stayed at their home, it would be filled, maybe two or three of them. Steady as always, my Uncle Bob, never faltered or gave up on any of us.

My last story to make you laugh and give you a grasp of how amazing this man is.

One of the times I was staying with them, Trina Lou and I had been riding bikes, in the neighborhood. We lost track of time (usual) and he came looking for us. When I saw the red station wagon driving down the road I said, ” Trina! We are in trouble.”

I jumped up from the wet ground and waved him down. I was filthy, butt wet from sitting in the grass, hair matted in the back because I hated taking time to comb it, I looked like I didn’t know how to dress myself. He slowly pulled off the side of the road, I immediatly began telling some long, dragged out, story of why we weren’t home. (Like I knew!). He listened patiently and I can now see he was laughing deep down, but he stayed calm. He replied with, “Girls it’s getting late you need to get home.”

I said, “Shew, we are a long way from home, I am glad you came…I will put my bike in the back…”

Continues with a straight face, not a shriek, peep nothing was to prepare me for what he said. My Uncle Bob smiled, then chuckled (like he does) and replied to my simple, understandable request with, “Nope, you are riding home. I am not putting you or that bike in my car.”

Let’s rewind! What? Did my Uncle Bob just laugh at us, four or five miles from home, drove out here not to yell at us, beat us, or anything, but won’t put my bike in his car? What is happening? I was devastated. However, after our ride home I never did that again.

Wrap it up: I could tell you a million funny and heart warming stories, about this man, my family has been blessed with.

He has lived with a lovely wife that I know he has always loved dearly. Even when she said, “Sure, you can live with us.” (Off the top of her head!).

He has Spent fifty Christmases, same as Thanksgiving, always tried to ensure my Aunt came home once a month (if possible), has been through Uncle Rod going to Vietnam, all of the nieces and nephews being born, countless birthday parties, graduations, he has cried with us, and laughed with us. All of this is just from his wife’s side of the family. He still has his other side to tend to and everyone elses too. Uncle Bob stayed strong and steady and carries on like none other!

Happy Birthday Uncle Bob we appreciate you! You are awesome!

We all love you!!! I hope you get to Golf today!

Livelove