Tag Archives: letgo

There is no greater or less than, when it comes to you…

As ‘life’ seems to happen around us, many people like to compare stories or talk about the issues. However, there is no comparisons between your story and theirs.

Of course we are all connected and as humans, we can all FEEL empathy or sympathy depending on our similar incidents.

But…everyone has moments of being depressed, sad, hurt, lost and disappointed. I can remember the day, my son explained that pointing out all the reasons someone should be grateful, isn’t always the best feeling emotion for someone suffering. I questioned why or why not, it always seemed to work for me. Highlighting all the reasons I should be grateful, how blessed I am and so on.

Nick explained how sometimes those comments are more detrimental to the person.

That was several years ago and to be completely honest, I didn’t truly understand.

Now, I do!

You see we ALL have moments where life feels overwhelming, too much and disappointing. Those who their stories, are well known and inspire others, but also you and me.

As I wrote and rewrote my speech for the area contest @Earlybirdstoastmasterskc, the days seemed to be zooming by. Closer and closer, my excitement was building and the anticipation of all the exciting opportunities, this club has to offer, was assisting me in working up the best message, I had ever written! Ohhh, if you could only feel my radiating excitement.

Yet, day by day in LA we had to jump one hurdle and then twenty five more or maybe a hundred more! (Okay I am being a bit over dramatic, as Ashby says).

But it is true. I could whine and cry about every little speed bump thrown in front of us, but where would we be then? Instead let me share what I have learned.

This week I had to let go of my first speech competition. It was to be on Monday February 5th. There were no guarantees I would move on to the next level, because our club has intense competition, but I wanted to attempt it, in the worst kind of way!

I had prepared and practiced the entire road trip from Kansas to LA.

As the hurdles popped up, some one at a time, others it seemed like fifty at a time, I began to realize my excitement was about to he turned into disappointment! With all the issues about having Princeton, I quickly realized my trip would be delayed, forcing me to step down from the competition.

Now this may seem silly to anyone else, but I cried and cried! I was disappointed, sad, overwhelmed and a little bit selfish. Most of all I was torn! This was my baby girl and very dear to me granddog. But I also wanted to attempt this competition!

Then my lessons began!!! Everytime I would express my disappointing emotions someone would share on Facebook or tell me about a horrific event. For example in the past month we have lost loved ones to accidents, cancer, flu and suicides. I would cry for them or add to my prayer list.

Yes, my silly little issues seemed trivial after all of that. I have so much to be grateful for, I know that.

Then I realized Nick was correct. Pointing out or minimizing our own disappointments, by comparison, is not fair, to you.

My epiphany was EVERYONE, experiences their own depression and disappointments. And YOURS is just as important as the next one. Because we are all on our own journey and life happens whether we are striving to improve or not.

And MAYBE, JUST MAYBE…this is a key to helping others choose to feel all the emotions, yet not give up.

The key is to allow yourself to feel the negative emotion. Express your feelings of disappointment. (Allow this moment). Do not worry about feeling trivial compared to other people’s issues. I am Not saying dwell on it and/or illuminate the situation, but rather, ALLOW yourself to have a moment of tears.

It is okay!!! There is no greater and less than, when it comes to you and how you feel. Maybe if we begin to allow kids and adults to say, “I feel like giving up.”

We will have less severely depressed or suicides. When I was having a moment of ‘selfish disappointments’ it felt good to allow the sadness, for a moment. It forced me to find solutions, it allowed me to be human, and it reminded me how quickly ANYONE can give up.

It is time we begin to allow our younger generations to know we have all been there. We have all had struggles and let it out. All of it! Say it if you feel it. It’s okay.

No matter how trivial it may be to others. Your disappointments, moments of sadness or maybe your losses are not comparable to others! You are allowed to say it because believe it or not… EVERYONE experiences negative emotions.

My greatest hope is…this post will help one person to choose life. If you are not feeling so well about something, say it! And quit worrying about comparing apples, arangatans, and kale spinach. This is YOUR EXPERIENCE! No one elses!






Happy Coaching 101 (day four) tbc…

Yesterday, I left you hanging because you received exactly the information, I received when I told this nice (strange, to me at the time) lady her first Happy message.

At first it was the usual, I send the message and no response. I messaged her the next day and said, “Are you okay? Do you want to continue your coaching?”

Normally, I do not feel the need to have a response, but for some reason my confidence was way down, due to the circumstances. You see, after she told me about her loss, I questioned, is their happiness after losing a child or your husband? I wasn’t sure and nor did I want to find out. Therefore, like many others I chose to not talk about those horrific events or possibilities. God had a different plan!

Please note that my first response, when she requested Happy Coaching, was No. I am not sure this is what you need! Why? Because after she told me her circumstances I was pretty sure a grieving counselor would be best. However, she sternly insisted and explained, “I have already done all of the counseling, I am going to do. I wish to receive your services.”

Now for her first response to the message. After sending it I heard nothing for about twenty four hours. The next day was rapidly ending when I receive a text that said, “NO.’

“No? What? No you do not want to continue? No you won’t create the map? No you won’t take the imaginary eraser and erase your pain? What is the No for,” I asked.

I received nothing for another twenty four hours. Then this is the explaination…”No, I will not erase anything! No, I do not want to discontinue the coaching! No, I do not want to share, but did create it.”

Okay? I thought. Then I sent the next message:

I am glad you chose to not erase all the tears, pain and hurt you have had in your life. Now it is time to create the next portion of your life map. What you want or desire? The past map was for you to recognize that you have had some fun life experiences and to see how many skills you have developed. The imaginary eraser was for you to delete the pain. However you quickly realized erasing those down times, you would be erasing the good as well because no matter what, there will always be ups and downs. But to erase the pain is to also erase the life with your child and husband and although losing them was terrible and hurt dearly, you would not have wanted to miss being with them on this journey. Enjoy, creating the life you want to lead. What does a typical day look like? Where do you want to live? Do NOT hold back allow the freedom of your imagination.

Please note, I know how difficult it must be, to focus on the future with all your loss, but this is one portion of our steps to finding your own happiness. That is to recognize the past has brought you to this point and no matter what you nor anyone else can change it. However, it is up to you to decide how you incorporate your paradigm, into your future. The main goal is to NOT live in the past, learn from it, enjoy the good parts and now only focus on the future (end of message).

I learned as much from this lady as she did me. We didn’t talk on the phone, she paid in money orders, and nor did I have her address. Even when I attempted to make excuses or bow out (due to being unsure I could help her) she would insist and deliver me a message.

From what I have learned is everyone suffers at one point in their life. Whether it be losing a child, divorce, death, drugs suicide, accidents, job loss, illness and much more. Everyone is on their own path and we all handle circumstances differently. However, one thing is for sure…Happiness is a choice. You can choose to mourn for the rest of your days and highlight the catastrophes. Or you can choose to live for the next great adventure and highlight the accomplishments.

On a personal note…I have had some of my dear friends suffer great losses and I am super sorry for that. My only hope is for you to remember and illuminate the GOOD in those loved ones you have burried. Try not to focus on their absence as much as their triumphs. My dear friend, who lost her son to a deadly illness always told me, I don’t want him to be known for his illness, death or his name to be emotionally attached to sadness or despair. Rather, she wants him to be known for his life, accomplishments, and his kindness he brought to the world. Wow! I must say that is a phenomenal desire and wouldn’t our loved ones be so happy to know, we are celebrating them?

God Bless!

Until we meet again my friends, your legacy will live on.









Happy Coaching 101 (Day 2, free trial)

This segment was for a beautiful woman, who was struggling with depression, divorce, and detoxing from a toxic relationship. She has been through a great deal this past year. However, I know, her messages assisted her in more ways than one.

My friend, you are worthy of being happy and you deserve it. At this time it is time for you to let go of a lot of crud!! It is the time for you to begin allowing, receiving, and let go!! Life is meant to be happy!!!! Nothing else matters!! Oh sure you will have down times, but they are simple reminders of what you do not want!!! The difference is now you know the reason for these paths of least resistance (Abraham-Hicks) therefore, any negativity or hurtful times will only last a short amount of time! Once you recognize why you are feeling this resistance, then you change it.

You are amazing and I know how difficult it can be to let go and accept that life is so simple but it is!!!! The meaning of life is….hmmm think it’s time to figure that out for yourself.






suicide? Suicide? SUICIDE?

This picture is on a house boat with Darion Drake and Matt Reed, when they were little. Although his memory will always live on, his physical form was taken from us. Why? Because he couldn’t see a better way! Isn’t it time we show others, there is always a choice. A choice to live. If life feels ‘too much’, pause, breathe and hold on…THIS TOO WILL PASS!

I will never ever forget the moment, I received this crazy phone call! “Teena, Matt has killed himself!”

I rubbed my eyes, cleared my throat and asked,”What? Did you say Suicide?”

“Yes, he is gone!”

(This is not a posting to upset anyone, but it needs to be written!)

I woke Eric up and we both broke down and began to sob. Heart broken, angry, hurt and deeply saddened were just a few emotions, we were experiencing.

You see this was extremely unexpected, because Mathew had been through this exact same horrific experience, with his older brother. He was a teenager and it happened right before his birthday. So you can imagine why we never thought Matt was capable of repeating the event.

However, sadly he did! Leaving his sister, mother and nephew with voids, never to be filled.

Let me tell you about Mathew Reed!

He had a spirit of LIVING! He loved cars, helping others, his family (especially his wonderful nephew). He was a ball of energy. Always willing to lend a helping hand and he could make you laugh until you peed your pants!

At his visitation, I heard the same thing over and over again. “Why? He was such a great person. Why?”

I wish I could answer such a simple question, as to why? But I can’t. Instead, I want to illuminate his life and hopefully help someone else. As I write, in almost ALL of my postings, NO ONE CAN CHANGE THE PAST! I, nor you can reverse what has been done. Yes, you can receive strength to carry on, but once any act or deed is done, it is done.

However, I do believe, my loving Mathew Reed and I can help someone. Someone who is hurting, contemplating and feels stuck.

You see IF we could have stopped this, Matt would probably be preparing for a fun filled night of hanging with his friends. Texting me at midnight to just wish me Happy New Years and laughing about all the crud he has been through. However, none of those events can or will happen.

Sad? Yes! Change it? No 😔!

Learn from him? Definitely 😎!!

If Matt could speak to you right now he would say, “Hold on. Pause. Breathe Deeply. And LIVE ON!”

It’s okay to feel…anyway you want to feel. But please continue to remember, ‘This too will pass.’

I love you Mathew Reed and will continue to send out your message.

God Bless

Please, I beg of you, help me to help others. Tell someone today, that no matter what, it’s going to be okay. It will work out and this to will PASS!






Here I go again!

Picture this, I am without makeup, hair is up in a messy bun, still in my pajamas and have only had one cup of coffee. That cup is the only evidence of me even being out of bed…THE ENTIRE DAY! So What? I will tell you so what, I should be off to the shower, getting dressed and attempted to look productive. BUT NOOOO…I am sneaking back to my computer to write, just one more. One more inspirational thought to share. One more description so intense, you are entranced to continue to read, follow, like and share, all in one fell swoop. Why? Why do I choose to write it? Why? Why can’t I be like everyone else and just video blog it? I guess in time. However, for now my large audience of six readers, sixty one followers and forty likes, I dramatically, thank you for reading and liking what I post! No, really I do appreciate you…All of you, even the yesterday you or the day before, that you too.

Sounds strange doesn’t it? For me to write, bizarelly, about appreciating someone each day, as if they were a different person each day! However, does it not seem strange for people to act, speak, or share how well they know you, yet haven’t spoken to you in, lets say, five years. Or maybe five months, what about a lifetime, only know them according to a form of media!

I don’t know why this message is becoming so strong. However, judgement of others is one of those ‘biggies’ some of us, all deal with, at one time or another. For some reason someone needs to read this message.

Listen up! I don’t care who you are. If you are one of my family members, an enemy (hope I don’t have any or if anything, I hope they will forgive me), the pope, a famous artist, young, old, religous or not…it doesn’t matter ‘who’ you are;  You are a different person than who you were last year. And thank goodness for it! I would never want to return to a more niave me or a less lived me. That one who might have not thought before she spoke or acted. The one who was not as well seasoned. The one who thought so many trivial things were important like competition or winning.

If you are continuously being ‘reminded’ of who you once were and you don’t like it, then YOU, LET IT GO! Some how change gears! In your mind. If you are known as inconsiderate and pompous and do not like that astigma, begin to act and feel as though, a person who is considerate and humble. I am sure you have had someone in your life that exemplified those qualities. I know as I wrote the curriculum for Livelove (still writing, but so close!) I would think back about my heros. Not everyone else’s heros and not my mom, who is always the number one hero, for me. But Heros who were talked about or ‘judged’ in a powerful, yet, positive kind of way!

Think about it…Pause, who are you patterning off of? Everyone patterns off of someone!! The difference is some of us recognize, who we want to pattern off of and choose to study them, their lives, and how they are portrayed. Maybe, you are reading this and you are saying, “I am a Christian and my hero is Jesus.”

Which is perfectly fine with me! Because the more I study leaders, the more I see those who stand for love, protection, kindess and abundance, are the ones who withstand time. My simple question is why do you live with so much judgement? On yourself and others…Want to live like someone as great as Jesus? Better do some research, because his love for all of mankind and what he stands for is… NOT JUDGEMENT! NOPE, I HAVE LOOKED, ITS NOT IN THERE.

Wow! I have had a weird week! One post about politics, now this about religion, oh and don’t forget the other ‘hot topics’ about depression and dejavus! I am just the messenger. I promise my disclaimer will say, judge me not for the message I bring, but rather enjoy the blessings of reading and learning.

You are okay! You are amazing! Please let go of the judgement and the harsh judgements will let go of you! You do deserve to live to be happy.

God Bless!

Written by: Momma Teena





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That’s okay punch me again and again I can take it! 

Sound familiar? How many of us say have you ever noticed when it rains it pours? This is very true it appears that deaths come in threes, I don’t know if it is multiples of 3, but you get the idea. Sometimes it feels like one financial tragedy leads to another or another or even another. 

Wait a minute! I guess insufficient funds means insufficient funds across the board. Therefore, it would be a dominoe effect. Meaning yes the more you focus on negative or ‘unhappy’ thoughts the more negative and ‘unhappy’ thoughts will appear. The GREAT NEWS IS…THIS UNIVERSAL LAW GOES BOTH WAYS! 

What? You mean I can begin to think a happy thought and it will go away? Yes, it can be that easy. However, I must admit if you go back and read my past few blogs you will see the ups and downs. Let me explain. I am on this great journey that began with a tragedy…Although I always knew my mission and passion I wasn’t fortunate enough to bring it all together until now 45 years later. However, I am grateful I am where I am now and want to share this journey with you. Okay if you were lost you are up to speed now, you may read on.

Anyways, after my lovely message of freezing negative events in your brain, walk away, bla bla bla. Yes if you read it, you understand. Anyways it is all very true and utilizing that technique is important and easy after you learn how!!! So after I wrote about ways to divert negative energy from punching you when you are down ,is to think happy thoughts and come back to it, I didn’t imagine I would have to test it. However, I did! I guess I should say I was privileged enough to try this technique. However, at the time I didn’t see it coming and shew I learned my lesson fast enough to move on. 

Okay so I am traveling down interstate 70, sunroof open, stero blasting 80s music on satellite radio, blue skys, I had blogged and was feeling on top of the world. Then I get a phone call from a disgruntled daughter who I am happy to hear from, but she proceeds to complain and says something that made me mad. I mean I was really mad in like ten seconds flat. Psycho mom stuff! 

I said, “Okay honey (gritting my teeth while forcing a smile like she could see me) I think we should hang up now. Mommy is driving and doesn’t want to have something bad happen, so I am gonna disconnect this phone call now.”

At that moment I began to think now I understand why people think when they are down life keeps punching them down even further. 

Don’t get me wrong my emotions were real and I had legitimate reasons for being mad, I also explained all of my expectations and how I felt and why I reacted that way and she was all about herself and why was she like that? SHEWY! That was a great deal of typing when all you need to know is recognize…I was more concerned about me, myself, and I than I was about my baby girl. I will admit it. Don’t mistaken me I always put the kids first, but after reading the above writing I was still struggling with letting go of control, which benefits or appeases me! Anyone, who knows me, knows I love and adore my children. This was the dumbest argument we had ever had in our entire lives. That’s how I knew it was a quick trip to a negative environment to look for the correct tool to use when a situation like this arises. 

We hung up and my phone went from 20 percent to zero percent in like five minutes flat. My charger won’t charge and I am getting ready to be riding solo for a few hours. I froze my anger as if it was a still frame from an old film, in my brain. Then I began to brag out loud about my daughter to the air and traffic, I probably appeared to be a lunatic. By the time I could use my phone I had teared up thinking about how amazing of a baby she was and all that she has accomplished in life, in just a short time. 

Many people will agree, it appears life kicks you down when your at your lowest. ( Or something like that). But it goes both ways. I had talked myself into letting go of this argument based on false expectations that no one knew about, except me. I truly just let it go and yes I felt a bit argumentative. However, after I listened to myself and I got over being mad ; I began recalling all of her adorable, funny, looks, sayings or even her long three hour self  written and orchastrared songs.  No the situation didn’t vanish immediatly but as soon as I recognized it for what it is, it vanished. 

That was my opportunity to test the tools and techniques. The argument didn’t become damaging to either of us, when it was over it was over. I even took time to thank her and explain what was going on. We kissed hugged and made up. 

So yes you will have moments that life will knock you down. Work, family, kids, outside events…your job is to find the quickest and simplest way to divert the energy 😋!  Find a happy image or thought to quickly change scenes in your mind. At first this will be a struggle but keep at it, keep practicing because your end result is phenomenal! 

God Bless and remember to Have Fun!!!!