My First recorded SUNSHINE MESSAGE! I am so excited!! Up very soon a ‘Happy Message’ daily! If you are struggling with the past this will HELP!!!
To Be Continued…
(We left off at this part of our story)
With their feathers ruffled as if they were taking flight, the boys took off running towards Franky’s back yard.
Freddy decided not to go because he was so mad at how rude his friends were. 😠😳
When the boys entered the gate their eyes almost popped out of their heads! Toys, a sand box, outside games, a swing set and at least ten other Flamingos. All GIRLS! And All different colors!💖💚💙💜💛
At first Ralph, Freddy’s best friend felt sad that Freddy didn’t come and began to turn around to beg him to join them.
Until, he spotted Franky slipping out the gate to go ask Freddy. Before she disappeared she paused, turned around and winked at Ralph. He smiled real big and went off to play in the sand box with Mabel the purple Flamingo.😉
To be continued…
Franky lightly pecked on the gate to Freddy’s back yard, as she began to tumble and fall into the gate. It flew open making a loud BANG, as it swung with great force. Due to Franky completeing a somersault, with head first and feet quickly following. She landed with a ‘SPLAT’ flat on her back, starring up at the gigantic cumulus clouds floating by.
When Freddy rushed over to check on his new friend, he noticed she had two long, pink & lime green, tubes tightly gripped in her beak. She may have taken a tumble, but she refused to ruin her new friends gift!
Freddy gently removed the funny shaped tubes from Franky’s beak and the two began to laugh, HYSTERICALLY! Before long they were both laughing so hard they were rolling on the ground, with tears in their eyes. They were holding their cheeks & tummies trying to ease their discomfort from the over abundance of laughter.
Between gasping for air and left over chuckles, Freddy asked Franky, “What were you trying to do? And what are these things?”
Recovering from her somersault and long outburst of laughter she replied with, “Bubbles! Those are bubble containers in our own colors! I was bringing them to blow bubbles with you and ask you to come to my house and play.”
The two of them rolled around a few minutes more, enjoying the moment of laughter and regaining their composure. Until both flamingos were silent, laying in the sunlite, not moving a muscle.
Freddy broke their silence by clearing his throat, as if he were about to make a declaration, he paused for a moment, then rolled towards Franky and said, “I don’t want to come to your yard to play. Not because I don’t like you, but because I am so mad 🙁 at my friends. And, and…(his feathers began to become ruffled again, as he raises them up and pushes one in Franky’s face as if he is pointing at her)…and if you knew how awful they talked about you, without even knowing you…GRRRR, it makes me mad even thinking about it again! I mean they were terrible! And then they ran over there without a care in the world! (He takes a deep breath in and his voice begins to crack) It was awful! They didn’t like you because of your color and your gender! I am sorry to tell you this, but my friends are FAKE FRIENDS! And I am super disappointed in all of them! Well at least most of them! So if you want to stay here and blow bubbles, I am fine with that! BUT I am too upset to go over there!”
Franky starred at Freddy, batting her long, beautiful eyelashes, as she listened intently to her new friends feelings! However, when he had completed his negative rant, Franky shrugged her shoulders, gave him his bubbles and simply replied with, “Hmmm I am sorry this incident bothered you so bad. I was only sad because my mommy didn’t let me invite you, myself. If you don’t want to come over that is fine, you can keep the bubbles, I hope to see you next time!”
And off she went, disappearing behind the gate once again.
Freddy stood there in a state of confusion. He thought to himself…Did she not hear anything I said? Why did she just go back to playing with those Flamingos, who didn’t like her just because she was green and female!
He wandered over to the peep hole in the fence. With his one eye ball, he scanned the entire back yard with in seconds! It did look like a great deal of fun! Fillip was racing a lavendar, girl, flamingo through the obstacle course. Franky was riding big wheels with Frank. Ralph and Mabel were eating a yummy ice cream over at the hot, pink, picnic table.
Freddy continued to think about how awful his friends were. He questioned how Franky could make friends with people who had said so many ugly things, without even knowing her.
Finally, he couldn’t stand it any longer! He marched over to Franky’s back yard. As soon as everyone saw him they ran over to greet him! “Hey so glad you came! Hello Freddy, it is nice to meet you! Freddy, I am glad you decided to join us!”
But Freddy had already made his mind up! He couldn’t let it go! He had come for a purpose and he KNEW he was doing the ‘right’ thing! He swooshed his feathers back and forth to shush everyone standing around him. He raised his head real high, beak up, stomach in, and he announced…(clearing his throat to ensure everyone was listening), “I am here to announce…”
The big, blue, Flamingo turned down the music and everyone became silent. No one moved, spoke or even took their eyes off of Freddy. As they anticipated what he had to say.
“I am here to announce…my Pink Flamingo friends from my backyard…(big breath inhale and exhale) DO NOT LIKE YOU! BECAUSE YOU ARE GIRLS AND DIFFERENT COLORS!’
An awkward silence spread throughout, with a few snickers, and some sounds of disapprovement, when Freddy completed his last word, COLORS! Frank, the one who spoke up before, questioned Freddy, “How would you know? You have been whinning over there by yourself! We are the ones who came over here and have made friends! Go back to your lonely yard, if you don’t want to have fun because we are having fun and are happy.”
Freddy stood there wondering where he went wrong. He dropped his head, began to cry, and walked towards the gate. He couldn’t understand how being honest was a bad thing. He wasn’t trying to hurt anyone, but yet he felt terrible.
Before he could disappear behind the gate as eloquently as Franky does, he heard a more mature voice, speak up, “Freddy, we all want you to stay! Please won’t you come have an ice cream.”
Freddy continued to look down at the ground and slowly walk towards the gate, “No, I can’t! No one wants me here! I guess I am a bad Flamingo!”
Out from the shadows of the house stepped a six foot, beautiful, lanky, lime, green, female flamingo and she said, “Everyone is welcome at our home! And I want you here,” in the most Angelic voice Freddy had ever heard.
At first his entire body felt frozen as he starred up at this different, but exquisit species. He wondered if she was even a flamingo. Freddy wiped the tears from his eyes and replied, “But I said the wrong things. I made everyone mad at me. I feel so bad, but I felt bad before and I thought if I came over here and told them…”
“Pause, take a deep breath my sweet child. I knew what you were attempting to do. Let me ask you something, can you change what you said? If you could, would you?”
“Of COURSE! I would most definetly take it all back. I wouldn’t have stayed over there by myself. I would not have came over here and announced all that mean stuff,” explained Freddy.
“Let’s start over! Hello, my name is Lilly. Your name is?” The beautiful flamingo asked Freddy.
“My, my, name is Freddy. I am your next door neighbor. My best friend lived here before you. I wished whoever moved in would be a nice family with children.”
She gave him a big hug and patted him on the tail feathers, as if she were saying shew, shew, now it is time for you to go play and have fun.
All the other Flamingos gathered around Freddy to show him the wonders of Franky’s backyard. The other girls introduced themselves and went on playing.
Freddy felt a tap on his shoulder but when he turned to the right there was no one there. He quickly turned back to the other side to attempt to catch the culprit. When he turned back facing front he jumped because Franky screetched, “BOO!”
They both began to laugh once again.
Freddy looked at Franky and said, “I am so sorry! For…”
But before he could continue Franky shoved him with her shoulder and said with a smirk, “Apology accepted. I knew you would come around!”
“How? How did you know? I was so angry and hurt…I couldn’t think of anything good!”
“Because my family’s motto.”
“Yes, you don’t think we are oblivious to our differences do you?”
“No? But what does that have to do with it?”
“Our family motto is…’Create enough FUN that your differences become an ASSET or a GIFT rather than a hinderance.’ ”
Freddy repeated the family motto to himself a couple of times. Although he agreed with it, he continued to struggle with the past comments. He asked Franky, “But what about before? When they said they didn’t like you because of your color and gender?”
Franky giggled and said, “You have a great deal to learn. For now, lets just say I expected their first responses. But the difference between you and me is that you blend in with the majority of pink flamingos. Soooo you became offended for me. Which is understandable and I do appreciate your kindness. However, I know I am beautiful! And I have been taught to love all flamingos regardless of their differences. As for their past comments…I knew they didn’t know any better.”
“One more thing, Freddy…we all make mistakes. It’s up to us whether we want to forgive or hang on. No matter what, none of us can ‘fix’ the past. It’s your choice as to what to keep or let go.”
Freddy and Franky hugged and went off to the sand box. They played until bedtime. Roasted marshmallows, sang around the camp fire, and enjoyed all of their new friends.
Rather than trying to conform or force others to be just like us, why don’t we all enjoy our differences!
Franky and Lilly were correct! We all make mistakes. It is up to YOU to forgive, forget, and have fun. Or hang on, blame, and live in depression.
I am so grateful for you reading this. We hope Freddy and his friends will continue to empower you and carry Livelove’s message.
Everyone makes mistakes. Everyone needs a little help sometimes.
Email us: Livelove.firstname.lastname@example.org and we will set you up with the BEST Coach for you!
Written by: Teena Drake
© owned by Teena Drake
How can cat litter and relationships be compared? If you are having trouble in your relationship, at this time, you do not want to miss this message.
Is your partner driving you crazy? Do you wonder why you even try? One thing is for certain if you are struggling…You are living in the Cat Litter Box with generic litter. You know the kind that does not cover up any of the smell and generic toilet paper is more absorbent than this bunch of rocks, you attempted to save a dollar bill on. (Pause…Take a big whiff, inhale, and smell the nasty litter you are using that is ineffective).
Living in the cat litter box with your partner is disgusting. It means that you take a poo, half way cover it up, allow them to do the same, and your smelly dance is never-ending.
For example: If you are struggling in your relationship say out loud ‘why’ you feel the way you do.
Did you hear your fears from the past come out? Do you realize most of what you said is no different from cat poo in the box? It happens, it will stay there until it is cleaned up, and it smells to high heaven, until it is bagged and disposed of.
Most arguments involve words like: should, could, would, wish, why did you, what if (which is asked due to their or your paradigm= past), how could you and the past continues to take over the future.
“You are living in the past or holding your significant other to yesterday. Yet expecting them to not return the favor.”
That’s just like standing in a cat litter box taking a poop, your partner doing the same, although it is covered, you keep digging it up, and smelling the disgusting aroma.
When in reality once the poop is there the choices are inevitable 1. Enjoy the aroma. Or 2. Clean it out by bagging it, tying the top to seal it and disposing of the evidence.
Does this mean it never happened? Come on we all know sh*t happens. But do we want to continue to dig it back up? Is a better question.
Are you and your partner living in the cat litter together? Worse yet, have you decided to be cheap and using the kind that never gets rid of the smell?
Recognize what you are doing, decide what or how the significant other could fix your emotions (not that they can, this is only to recognize why you are feeling so irritable with them), and make a good decision for you both.
It is not about the solution, it is about getting out of the disgusting cat liter box!
My greatest hope is you get a little laugh and a lot of relief. You are awesome and worthy of feeling good!
Sending you LOTS of LOVE!
God loves you.
Living in the past can always be compared to poo. The past happens, but do you want to continue to live then? When you can decide today to feel and smell better?
Livelove.email@example.com a message for you if you need it.
Thank you for reading.
Written by: Teena Drake
What the heck are you? Are you a writer? Speaker? Coach, Author, Educator, or Entertainer? What the heck are you?
After my last speech at Toastmasters in KC, these and many more questions filled my brain. After someone asked the above questions and, “What are your plans, next?”
I spent the last 24 hours with a sense of sadness as I allowed myself to reminisce through the past. Did I say something wrong? Maybe I am too much? What am I? Who am I? What if I can’t make it? What if? Why? Maybe I am not good enough?
NEXT…I woke up this morning allowing the same questions to pound through my head like a bull in a china shop! WHAT AM I DOING? You see I was focusing on what had already been done.
Finally, I found my manuscript from a coaching session of an elementary student! In the very beginning, I taught her how to find and use a ‘Happy Word’. Then I explained that as long as she was focusing on what she CAN CHANGE and not the past, everything would be fine. For example: She had failed a spelling test and was extremely upset with herself for not studying. I redirected her attention to the fact that the only thing she can change is the next spelling test. Unless of course the teacher would let her re-take the last exam.
Day after day we would discuss why she was sad or angry. Each time it was something she had already done and couldn’t take back.
Do you do this? I do! If I allow myself to become engrossed in the past. I become sick to my stomach, don’t eat, and wallow in self pitty. But the truth is you or myself, cannot redo yesterday, we can only improve today.
My answer to all the questions are YES! I am a writer, speaker, coach, published author, educator, entertainer and…much more.
Just like you, I must feel down on occasion to enjoy the up moments.
If you are feeling sad, depressed, frustrated or angry today…allow your brain to feel the emotions long enough to remind you, this is NOT THE WAY YOU WANT TO FEEL!
Now, take your smile back. Find your many titles and wear them with pride. I know it isn’t always easy to let go of the past. Or to forgive those who irritated you. However, I promise if you will hold on…one more minute…find a happy thought and reset your vibration.
Some ideas on how to quickly reset:
Last time I checked no one is perfect. I know I am not, but our imperfections mold us and allow our talents to be illuminated!
Sometimes giving up feels like it would be easier. But I promise even that phase or process of giving up hurts worse than a reset. So I beg of you if you are reading this post…right now…please know:
YOU ARE WONDERFUL JUST THE WAY YOU ARE! YOU HAVE GIFTS TO SHARE WITH THE WORLD! YOU ARE WORTHY OF BEING LOVED! YOU ARE WORTHY OF BEING HAPPY. FEEL HOW AWESOME YOU ALREADY ARE AND KEEP ON ADDING TITLES TO YOUR LIFE WITH PRIDE.
Happy Coaching- Livelove.firstname.lastname@example.org
Written by: Teena Drake
As Livelove LLC evolves and grows by leaps and bounds my circle of people continues to grow like wild flowers! Yesterday, I left the house at 1:00 in the afternoon and returned around 9:30 in the evening. My day was filled with beautfiul people, some I was collaborating with, others coaching and wrapped up the day with learning more about my Earylybird Toastmasters family. To say the least it was magnificent! I felt blessed beyond belief.
As I laid my head down to relax, my mind raced as if I were in the Indy 500. Comments, conversations, scenarios, and questions raced around and around chasing one another.
Then it suddenly stopped! Similar to a dime spinning and wobbling, only to have a hand smack it…SPLAT! The dime lays still, waiting for someone to pick it up and begin again.
My STOP! Was the moment I realized, “GEEZ, even God is not as hard on us, as WE ARE!”
As my mind was suspended in space, merely observing the comments made throughout the day, by others and even me. Thats when I questioned, “Why? Why do we beat up on ourselves? Why do we feel so compelled to be perfect?”
Why do we continually beat the same old drum? With the same repeat pattern?
What can you change about yesterday? My friend, you can change nothing about yesterday! The only thing you can do with yesterday is regurgitate it over and over in your mind or with others. However, it can never be ‘fixed’ or altered. The past is where it is for a reason.
Instead, try implementing these little thoughts to help you adjust, readjust, and begin focusing on creating tomorrow’s memories by making today magnificent.
For the past has already come and went. Tomorrow may never come. Leaving TODAY, is all you have to play. Enjoy!
Need a little extra help jumping some hurdles in your life? We have a multitude of resources and would love to help you find your ‘Happy’ Spot today and beyond!
Also don’t forget to send me a message, Facebook post or email if you are ready for your copy of Happy Coaching 101! I plan to have it published asap. Completing the finishing touches this weekend and my goal is May to have it ready!
(The first edition will be e-book, second Audio, and third will be paperback, but if someone insist on a paper back I will see if my friend Dave is up for the task, LOL)
Written by: Teena Drake Nickname- Sunshine!
Have you ever thought about what you receive, that is gratifying when you beat a nail over the head with a hammer, over and over again? Not that you are building anything, but rather simply pounding away at the same nail, in the same spot. BAM, BAM, BAM, BAM, BAM, BAM, BAM, THUD (MISSED IT ONCE), BAM, BAM, BAM, BAM SPLAT…OUCH, I hit my finger! How monotonous would that be? Is there anything gratifying from this simplistic action? What about the question, is there anything harmful? This action, does it cause you any serious harm?
If you do not hit your finger, could the action of the described event be harmful? Not really.
What do you receive when you have a piece of wood, a nail, and a hammer? A situation without a solution. Think about it, some people love to take the same situation, one solitary nail or thought, and they hammer it until it becomes the same sound and same results.
Maybe it is time to leave the situation where it belongs. What is done is done. If you made a mistake be grateful you have the emotion of sorrow, so you will learn from it and move on. Most people do not make the same mistake twice if they feel a little resistance (or sorrow) for their actions.
However, if you are continuously focusing on something you cannot change, STOP, if you desire change! It creates you great pain and although it is not visible damage, such as the hammer and nail, the internal effects, would shock you.
Allow yourself to be happy. You do deserve it and drop the hammer, aren’t you tired of swinging it?
Email us: Livelove.email@example.com
Need a little extra help? Angel Card Readings are now available…just email us!
God Loves you no matter what!
It’s that time of year to reflect, plan, and carry on. As I look back over this past year, I feel like the past 365 days have been 365 years. Have you ever had a year like that?
The first four months I focused on moment by moment and one step, literally, at a time. The next few months were filled with Senior Spring Break, graduation and more transformations.
Although this year has seemed long in some ways, it’s difficult to believe it is over. And yet, it is the last official day of 2017.
What do you do with special days like today? Hopefully, you take time to write all your past accomplishments, this year. Check off the accomplished goals and set some new journeys/goals for 2018.
When you focus on all the ‘good’ you have in your life, it illuminates you and lifts you up, to be in line for more good.
One of my favorite rituals is to scan through ALL of my pictures for the year. On my phone, Facebook or anywhere else I can find ‘snap shots’ of the year.
The most important action you can take today, is being grateful. Yes, as you review over the past, there will be some irritating conversations or events, but if you will tilt your head a different direction, a new perspective will appear.
In other words life isn’t meant to be perfect. However, those imperfections are what assist us in enjoying the Awesomeness of Living! So yes, skim over the low frequency times, remember them (for now), to learn, but don’t try to fix anything from then. IT CAN’T BE FIXED OR CHANGED.
When you stumble across an event that really hurts or bothers you, remind yourself, “I can not change the past. Therefore, I am only going to focus on today and my future.”
Listen up!! If you find yourself down and out…Pause, hold tight this too will pass. I promise, even if it hurts really bad today, tomorrow will be brighter. Look for the good in all situations.
I can smell the bacon sizzling, eggs a cracking, batters being whipped and beaten. Come about four o’clock in the morning, Thanksgiving morning. I would slip down the stairs as quietly as the old crickety floor would let me and slowly, ever so slowly, open the door at the bottom of the steps. Sliding my small little girl body through a sliver of an opening, to ensure I did not awaken my mom and dad, who were on the hide-a-way sofa in the, soon to be magical dining room.
As my bare feet touched the cold floor, I would cringe, drawing it back in hopes I would not groan so loudly, to wake everyone up. As I approached the opening to the doorway of the kitchen, I could hear her clanking the pans (as quietly as she could) and almost methodically dancing, in her house robe like a glowing angelic human. If I didn’t disturb her and freeze like a statue, I could hear her lightly singing a sweet hymn. Usually something like, Thank you Lord, for saving my soul or I will walk with Him and I will talk with him….
I try to hold my breath for as long as possible, so I can hear and watch her for just one more minute, only to slip on a rug, lose my balance and come sliding in the kitchen, butt first. She basically, keeps going and says, “Teena Gay, what are you doing up it is too early and you will be cranky before Thanksgiving dinner is served!”
As I began to whine and explain how excited I was and I rambled on, she seem to forget what she had said and would start talking to herself. Almost as if a check list was in her head and not even I could get her off track (Which if you know me I can get anyone off track, most of the time).
Mmmmmmmmm, can you smell it? I can! I can smell the green beans a bubbling, the turkey browning, the sweet pies a cooling. One by one a family member would emerge. Poppy would slip down the steps, wrap his arms around Baw Baw, giving her a reverse hug and a sweet peck on the cheek. She would always stop, pause and embrace his hugs and his kisses.
You know as I sit and write this I can’t help, but pause, close my eyes and as the tears stream down my face, I give thanks! I am grateful for these precious memories.
I remember thinking my grandmother was super woman! You know, I might be wrong, but until my Poppy passed away I think she cooked the majority of the food. I know we all pitched in something throughout the years, but honestly that was Violet Ashby’s legacy! Not just Thanksgiving Dinners, but bringing people together, by opening her home and preparing the most delicious, blessed and cooked with love meal anyone could ever imagine.
The time would quickly come, when those who weren’t in town, would begin to arrive. Oh the smiles on everyone’s face. The big hugs that seem to be never ending as the back screen door would open and SLAM, directly behind anyone who entered. Greetings, greetings!!!! It was like a house full of laughter and the energy was so strong it seemed as though, our farm home was coming to life celebrating hundreds of years of family, would vibrate and glow.
Finally, it was time to eat. Now most of the time as we all gathered around the ‘big people’s’ table or the ‘kids’ table off to the side (I don’t think I sat at the big people’s table until after I was an adult of like 25! Lolololol), the room would be so loud, Forman Hamilton who was the neighbor down the road, could hear us. However, once my Poppy, Uncle Bob, or Uncle Rod said, “Let’s bless this food…”
We all stopped talking and immediately grabbed hands and bowed our heads. It was like a snap of the fingers when it happened! Next, BRING ON THE FOOD!!! Heavenly Ham, terrific turkey, goodness gracious gravy, pluffy potatoes, stupendous slaw & stuffing and Pie, pie, pie! Did I forget to mention Butterscotch PIE!
We would all pass the food around the table: macaroni and cheese oh my!
As Thanksgiving approaches, enjoy each person you are with. Take time to put your phones down and turn off your technology for just a moment and record those smells, laughters, moment by moment sounds and events in your memory bank. Because you can never relive this time again. Next year will be different. It may not seem much different, but it will be. Everyone will be a year older, have new perspectives, some will pass others will be born, no matter what the only way you can relive a memory, is create one!
Thank you for reading, sending you much love!
(Don’t forget to check out December 8th, our upcoming event/celebration is going to be fun!)
I could have never been a baker because they would have to throw a delicious lopsided cake away, based on principal. However, the truth is I am enjoying serving more and more lopsided, imperfect, delicious, ooey, gooey, cakes. It may seem odd for me to create this comparison to life, but if you stop and think about it, maybe you will see.
In the past I would become so upset over the smallest things. Oh my if someone didn’t like me or worst yet, thought bad of me! I mean someone told me the other day they didn’t appreciate or agree with one of my blogs. I batted my eyes, truly listened to their concern and apologized. No, I wasn’t angry, hurt or frustrated! I kind of understood where they were coming from. (I will come back to this conversation later in the post).
No, I have never been a baker and I am pretty sure most of my cakes have always been losided, similar to a volcano drooping down on one side, unevenly. However, in other ways I was a perfectionist! I expected everything to be perfect. Actually that’s not quite true, I expected, for everyone else, to have expectations, of me, to be perfect! That makes so much more sense, to me.
You see Ms. Debbie’s words of wisdom rings, throughout my head, when someone misunderstands something I have written or stated, “Teena, you need to finish that thought; not everyone knows you well enough to follow the many thoughts rolling through your head. That means you could be easily misunderstood.”
It is true. My thoughts are swirling by the millions and when I become excited or extremely emitting energy in one way or another, the outcome of my words are not always self explainatory!
Back to the point! In the past I always thought I had to be perfect. Although it is unrealisitic nor possible, I placed those restraints on myself. I always wished I could blame this on someone else, but I can’t. It isn’t because of the expectations my mother had, husband or children. Not what the school system placed on me nor the parents or students. It was me! I lived in a perfect world and if anyone messed it up, I would almost fall apart just like a baker would if he/she had to serve one of my slippery sloping cakes.
However, now I just don’t have it in me. Not really that I have slowed down or my thoughts have become less and less. That is far from the truth! I rarely have any particular expectations anymore. I feel myself evolving to one of the richest parts of my life, yet. It is amazing! The feeling of butterflies fluttering in my stomach, when I know Eric is on his way home. The excitement that overwhelmes me when I get to see all my children, family and friends. I am truly grateful and blessed.
I can remember (which I will only remember this for a moment then I am letting it go forever) coming home and being filled with anxiety, stress and aggitation. I worried about how everyone, I do mean everyone in my life chidren, husband, mom, dad, grandma, teachers, peers, students, principals…I worried about! I can’t tell you how many tears I have shed over someone being ‘mad at me.’ If you have ever felt this way or continue to live this way, read on I am about to spill the beans of how it is ‘fake news.’
Come in closer, get real quiet while reading this…IT IS NOT IMPORTANT! Yes, you heard it here first! Perfectionism is not important nor will it add to your life. It is true. Being ‘Perfect’ is ‘Fake News.’ I have meditated this entire year, almost everyday, to gather information or muddle through some theories, so I could share with you! Guess what? I have even tried to Remember why I hated someone (never really experienced HATRED, nor do I want to, so let’s call it disliked their actions). Could remember very little. Almost like when you soak an aspirin to give to an elderly, attempting to swallow. The memory still had a little substance, but not enough to recognize what it was and the end result was no more pain or suffereing from that situation! Wow!!!! In other words, “This too will pass.”
Yes, some memories carry a powerful impact both negative or positive, but the strongest impact is how you felt and how you feel. Instead of struggling or wrestling with the past, go bake a cake! Make it lopsided, oozing with melted icing and enjoy the laughter about your blunders.
It is time to come out of the closet, perfectionist. You are worthy of being terrific without being perfect. Just do it! Drop your rules and regulations for yourself and let us see the beautiful YOU! The VIBRANT YOU! It makes me so excited, I just want to break into song! You know a random song that says, “You are wonderful, be happy, enjoy, mess up and laugh along the way!!!”
Hmmmm I might have something!
Back to the blog posting that might have not been a complete or self explanatory concept, I admit I have imperfections! Thank you for noticing and better yet thanks for reading my blog! As always I hope you are inspired and motivated to live a Happy Life!
Had to use this picture because all the lopsided cakes I look up were, what? PERFECT!!! Go ahead and try it, type in Google search, ‘Lopsided Cakes’ grrrrrr they were adorable!!!! Lol oh well be happy!
Good Morning!! This is my favorite day of the week!! Yes, believe it or not Monday mornings are my favorites, actually the entire day is!!! Isn’t that funny? I wish I could explain, one thing is for sure…it’s my FAVORITE DAY! As I was plugging in to my morning a Teena moment came to me! What if your paradigm or past was obsolete? Suddenly, out of no where…no one knew you and you had no recollection of anyone? What would you do differently?
Let me tell you about a little boy who challenged me everyday, yet said to me one day, “Do you know why I love you Mrs. Drake? Because you always accept me as a new me, the next morning.”
What???!!!! I think he must be talking about another teacher. Because everyday I prayed he would be a new him in the morning. And you can’t imagine how many days I thought, “I love you, but I don’t know if I can make it another day!”
I don’t care who you are, we all have people in our lives like this. Whether it be a student in your classroom or a Co worker, it doesn’t matter who they are it’s who or what you know about them.
After this thought about, your past being erased, I thought of that little boy, who believed in me because he felt like I believed in him! And I did!!!
This thought took me on a fun journey of emotions. Because I now know why that little boy said that!
I had him in 3rd grade and five years later I had him in 8th grade. Before 3rd grade began, I was handed 18 files to read and learn about my students. Their strengths, weaknesses and behavior issues. I read one!!!! (Which coincidentally he transferred out and I never had him). I closed the first folder and quietly walked to the office with all files in arms. I remember the look on our secretaries face (who I adore) when I said, “Can I have a copy of their medical files only? And any IEP’s?”
You know she wanted to say, “Are you stupid? You are holding them.”
However, I think the color still fading from my face and the weakness in my knees, explained it all!”
When I explained how I couldn’t educate effectively if I knew all the other opinions and data from their past. She was speechless. But it never did work with me!!!! My feelings were a great deal can change in one summer. There are so many factors that play into a person/students learning abilities, maturity, behavior ect… Yes this carries on with good or bad signals.
For example: That little boy was a day by day case, EVERYDAY. However, the first three weeks of school, I never knew this child had any trouble at all. He read at a 5th or higher grade level, he was loving, kind and amazing. (And still is to this day).
Then one day he didn’t come to school, then another. When he did return it was like a switch had turned on. His peers were constantly irritated with him, he would poke them, write on their papers…I mean I was in a state of grrrr!
What did I do? Funny thing is I didn’t realize it then, but now I see I did what came natural. I went with what I knew. I had built my own perspective of this child. Therefore, his paradigm to me was an intelligent, sweet, funny and kind child. I knew nothing about his past teachers opinions, his home life or his, let’s call it persistent personality, to ensure his life was as he wanted it. His paradigm was wiped clean as for me. That is why we had the discussion, EVERYDAY, “Tomorrow is a new day! You, my intelligent, well behaved, studious young man will begin again and tomorrow will be even better!”
Yes, we had that same conversation hundreds or maybe even thousands of times from 3rd grade, then 6th through 8th!
Did I change him? Nooo I do know I loved him, as a student. I do believe I helped him see a better him. And if you knew his real life paradigm, you like me, would be tempted to provide him with excuses. However, how would that help him? Or me or anyone else who might struggle with his quirky, nontraditional ways.
Ask yourself, “If my paradigm was wiped clean right now (and I was healthy bla bla bla), what would I want my new one to be?”
It is not to scare you, but just think…if you didn’t worry about the past, if no one had something to hold against you from 30 years ago (yes, people still claim to know someone even if they haven’t spoken to them in 30 years, that’s crazy to me). Not that you live your life based on other people’s opinions, just a fun little thought.
Next time you begin to become irritated with someone or something stop and ensure this is a reaction towards this particular incident and not a reaction based on the past. When you begin to live for or to feel good, life is paradise with a twist.
The twist being those small, quiet irritating moments to remind you of how you want your memories/paradigm, to be in one day, a month, a year or even years.
The pages are unwritten and you my friend are holding the pen!